Help with eating

The first thing is to congratulate yourself on posting this. Its a brave and major step. Well done for recognising what is happening, and that you are an emotional eater.

I know that I, and many others have experienced this, and may well go through this again in the future. There is no condemnation on here, we understand. Do you know why you have become so stressed, and if anything can be done to help your mental health situation?

You are not loathsome, disgusting or any other negative thing. You are a human being in a very difficult place in your life, keeping going as best you can. Well done for keeping going.

As you say, you have done it once, you can do it again. You dont have to undo the steps backwards all at once. Be gentle with yourself, remember to breathe, and know we will support you any way we can. Its Ok to be human.

Maggie75 said:

Hi everyone,

I'm a T2 diagnosed last November with HBA1C of 66, last HBA1C in Aug/21 was 39, previous had been 36 but my eating (badly) has spiralled out of control now due to severe anxiety due to health issues and depression. Unfortunately I'm an emotional eater and although I know this is doing me harm I cannot stop myself from doing it. I had lost almost 3 stone in 6 months, reckoning I've put at least a stone and a half back on, can't bring myself to step on the scales to confirm. I've contacted DN again and explained what's going on, she's arranging another appointment with the dietician for me and has told me to stay on 1 Metformin per day and have another HBA1C in 6 months to try and give me time to get eating under control. The only problem with that is I just don't know how to do that, I know the risks and what I'm doing to myself , it's like a form of self harm due to self loathing and stress. Would my GP be able to prescribe appetite suppresants or something that can make me stop eating like this? I hate the fact that I'm 46 years old and can't stop myself from eating junk food even though I know what it's doing to me and is likely to do in the future. Even reading this post back fills me with self disgust. Has anyone else been through this and if so what did you do? I've even considered going back to some kind of diet club that would keep me accountable at least even if their diet plans aren't ideal.

Maggie

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Okay, quit it right there. The whole self-loathing thing is absolutely uncalled for! Anxiety and depression are real, actual conditions, just as much as asthma is for instance... And if they cause you to do emotional eating, then that's a symptom... Not something you have 100% control over. You know yourself well enough to know that when the chips are down, you'll eat. That's good; if you know what your responses are, you can head yourself off! Listen to Antje, she's got the right idea. If you know you can't help yourself from (over-) eating, then make sure it's stuff you can eat without putting your blood sugars in the stratosphere. First, chuck out everything that's carby and tempting. Make the food bank happy if you want. Then shop stuff that won't hurt your levels. Get cold cuts, sausages, nice hard cheeses, bacon, olives, clotted cream, peanut butter (careful, some have sugars in), dark chocolate, salmon roll-ups with cream cheese or whatever... Anything that's good for a T2 and still feels very decadent: if you're eating for emotional comfort, then it'd better be stuff you enjoy the taste of, or it won't work.

Metformin is a suppressant, but if you're eating out of emotion rather than hunger, it might not help much in that regard. So you'll have to trick your brain for a while.

Take care of yourself eh. You're worth it.

Maggie75 said:

Hi everyone,

I'm a T2 diagnosed last November with HBA1C of 66, last HBA1C in Aug/21 was 39, previous had been 36 but my eating (badly) has spiralled out of control now due to severe anxiety due to health issues and depression. Unfortunately I'm an emotional eater and although I know this is doing me harm I cannot stop myself from doing it. I had lost almost 3 stone in 6 months, reckoning I've put at least a stone and a half back on, can't bring myself to step on the scales to confirm. I've contacted DN again and explained what's going on, she's arranging another appointment with the dietician for me and has told me to stay on 1 Metformin per day and have another HBA1C in 6 months to try and give me time to get eating under control. The only problem with that is I just don't know how to do that, I know the risks and what I'm doing to myself , it's like a form of self harm due to self loathing and stress. Would my GP be able to prescribe appetite suppresants or something that can make me stop eating like this? I hate the fact that I'm 46 years old and can't stop myself from eating junk food even though I know what it's doing to me and is likely to do in the future. Even reading this post back fills me with self disgust. Has anyone else been through this and if so what did you do? I've even considered going back to some kind of diet club that would keep me accountable at least even if their diet plans aren't ideal.

Maggie

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Maggie, by confessing this, you have made the first step to do something about it. It is a carnal thing that our body will desire stuff... it can come in the form of food or other vices... We just need to manage it.
I can understand that it can be tough and we all go thru a time or season in our life that may be tough for us and especially in such a time like this Pandemic... So first off, be glad and commend yourself for taking this first step of acknowledging your fault and the need to do something about it. It will be extremely difficult for anyone to do anything if one is in denial.
Loving to eat something is very common... what is controllable is when we need to stop. I have found out that a whole bag of junk food is really bad... but what if I stretch that junk food from one sitting cleaning the whole bag of say chips... to perhaps over the week.... rationing say a handful only... just to satisfy the craving.... this can be a start also for how you will turn your life around. When we have these quick wins, we know we can overcome what will come next...
Get used to being hungry or just below the starving line.... and don't feel you are going to waste the food... some of my friends including me used to think that it will be wasteful so best to polish it off and be done with it... then I realise the wisdom of a saying... food will always go to either my waist or to waste... so you can decide. I prefer not my waist....
Start with small achievable steps Maggie... you can do it. Once you overcome this, you will have control over your life and diet again. Stay safe and stay strong.

Maggie75 said:

Thank you for your replies, in answer to the question of why I have become so stressed, I've had 2 breast cancer scares in 2 years, both benign thank goodness but caused massive anxiety and depression which I already have anyway, stuck in a very unhappy relationship, in a stressful job which I hate, I just feel trapped and eating and drinking makes me feel like I can cope a little better which is just silly because of my T2. Obviously very personal things but hopefully they'll give an insight as to why I'm doing what I am. Very low self esteem the counsellors I've spoken to in the past have called it. This is why I need help with this, on waiting list for more counselling but that could take a very long time in this current climate we're in.

Maggie

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I know only too well how you feel and why you are out of control. I know that there will be lots of us who do as well. You start to feel that by slipping into old ways you have failed, but NO. It isn't easy to keep liking yourself or admiring your own surprising strengths when huge things come along and whack you in the guts, as they have with you. Try to focus on the road that you've travelled so far, and realise that you've only taken a wrong turning, and can soon get back there. With myself it was finding a comfort food to replace my old ones, and it's actually a creamy cheesy mash that isn't made with potatoes but you'd never guess! I then took time to try out lower carbs until I got to the stage of totally loving my food. I would love to help you find your way back, and I'm sure we all will support you until you do. Until then focus on the achievements you've made so far and be good to yourself xx

Massive hug to you. You are absolutely in the right place.

Find some recipes that appeal to you. If you adapt some old favourites like cauliflower cheese, lots of modifications you can make. Cottage or shepherd's pie. Change the mash topping for either cauliflower or celeriac mash loaded with butter and black pepper. It's a hug in a bowl.

Google keto mug cake. Yummy cake, takes around 90 seconds to nuke and serve with double cream.

Maggie75 said:

Thank you for your replies, in answer to the question of why I have become so stressed, I've had 2 breast cancer scares in 2 years, both benign thank goodness but caused massive anxiety and depression which I already have anyway, stuck in a very unhappy relationship, in a stressful job which I hate, I just feel trapped and eating and drinking makes me feel like I can cope a little better which is just silly because of my T2. Obviously very personal things but hopefully they'll give an insight as to why I'm doing what I am. Very low self esteem the counsellors I've spoken to in the past have called it. This is why I need help with this, on waiting list for more counselling but that could take a very long time in this current climate we're in.

Maggie

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Have you tried contacting MIND? They do some excellent councelling and CBT courses, including one on self esteem issues.

Treat yourself to Jen Unwins new book "Fork in the the road" . Lots on emotional eating in there , and good links to other types of support too.
There's a wealth of support out there, it's just a matter of finding what works best for you. A lot of sites etc advocate total abstinence but to me that seems too harsh in your circumstances

Totally agree with what others have said. Baby steps. I would suggest you stay well away from slimming clubs of any sort. They are not qualified to advise T2s on diet. I would also suggest you stay away from the scales as much as you can. Weighing yourself every day can be stressful and disheartening. I weighed myself at the outset to get my starting point. Then weekly for a couple of weeks. Although I needed to lose weight, my main object was to get the glucose down. So a few weeks later, fortunately I was alone in my kitchen, I coughed - and my skirt fell down. Got on the scales and said "woohoo" and straight on to ebay.......

Remember, we are here for you, even if you just want to let off steam. Keep an eye on the threads about success stories, there is one about what have you eaten today. But most important, find what works for you, baby steps.

Maggie75 said:

Thank you so much for all the replies, ideas and encouragement, I'm going to try making some small changes from now and build it up to changing my diet back to LCHF which will hopefully bring the weight off again and control the diabetes. I'm also going to look at MIND as well for the underlying issues, anything that I can do to help myself right now I'm willing to try. Thanks again for the help, it is greatly appreciated.

Maggie xx

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keep in touch and keep posting : )

Another who completely understands being an emotional eater myself. The world has been very tough for everyone even without all you have gone through so don't beat yourself up. you have achieved a great deal already.

I agree with the previous advice but thought I would just add a couple of suggestions. I completely agree with the idea of stocking up with low carb food that still is comforting. One thing I have is diet jelly with some cream. In summer I freeze the jelly and then it takes ages to eat. I also have cream with some sugar free syrups. That won't help with the weight but may be something that will help with the blood sugar levels.

comfort eating is tough. You know what you should be doing but can't do it. I say I have lots of willpower but not as much won't power.

Good luck and let us know how you are getting on.

Maggie75 said:

Thank you so much for all the replies, ideas and encouragement, I'm going to try making some small changes from now and build it up to changing my diet back to LCHF which will hopefully bring the weight off again and control the diabetes. I'm also going to look at MIND as well for the underlying issues, anything that I can do to help myself right now I'm willing to try. Thanks again for the help, it is greatly appreciated.

Maggie xx

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Hi Maggie,

Try looking at the things you can change. While mental health is being tackled, also try to get a grip on the circumstances that are making you miserable... Sometimes relationships need some extra work from both sides to survive. Sometimes, they just need to end. You might want to see which is true for you. As for work, there are more jobs out there... Not always easy to find, but one can try. If something is making you feel worse about yourself or your life, it may be time for a change. And it's not per se you that has to change, but the situation. You don't have to be stuck somewhere that makes you feel wretched, if you don't have to. You do deserve happiness, or contentment (which to me seems to be much the same), even if you may not feel like it most days.

Hugs,
Jo

I really feel for you, you are a survivor, you are worth do much more than a number on a scale, you have been through so much. I wish you could see how much we can all relate to your story. You are not alone. Even though it doesn't feel like it, you have got this!
Read back through your post, imagine it wasn't you had written it, it was written by someone you care deeply about. Would you be kind to that person? Yes would you understand that they were unwell and had been through do much physically and mentally? Yes.
You deserve the same consideration from yourself.
Reach out to your health care providers. Friends, family and loved ones and us. You can do this.xxx

I echo all the sensible comments made on this thread and have been through similar myself.
IN addition to Jen Unwin's book which is useful and comes from the point of view of a 'sugar addict', I found Elizabeth Benton's book on Chasing Cupcakes to be along similar lines and I've always rated her podcast Primal Potential. She is action oriented which I find helpful and good at calling out the BS on such self defeating statements as 'I always eat junk food' or 'I am a comfort eater and can't stop myself eating....' having been there and worn the tee shirt herself.
https://primalpotential.com/top-10ish-questions-about-chasing-cupcakes/
This is clearly about so much more than health for you so keep practising the good things you do do in your life !

Being unhappy at work can't be helping. There are so many places looking for staff at the moment, maybe set yourself the task of finding a new place of work. It could change things for you.
I once went from a place where I could do nothing right, according to my manager, to being valued and praised for just about everything I did - it made a terrific difference.