How do yo cope

[Nicolii]

There was a programme about diabetes on TV fairly recently. Man was having his foot amputated, sadly. The nurse bent over to him and said "and we've but a bit of glucose in your drip for you" like it was some kind of special treat. Too much glucose was the reason he was loosing his foot.

That nurse was just cruel.

 

[Nicolii]

That's completely understandable. Remember though that many people have completely irrational ideas or beliefs; and will have no clue about your condition. When I was first diagnosed I was told by two elderly ladies that they knew someone who was diabetic, and he just eat what he liked. The guy would probably have been killing himself. Not only that, but if I didn't eat all these high carb foods I'd "end up in a box". Stupid people to be ignored. Maybe the people you dine with are not real friends if they don't have your real interest at heart.

I honestly think lots of ppl are ignorant. There's a lot of ppl who love to overindulge and f you don't then you're not one of them and you're no fun. I just hate ppl focusing on me. Like one lady said 'you don't eat much' and that was after I had steak and potatoes for dinner followed by a large iced chocolate with cream.

 

[Nicolii]

Unless like me, you just can't tolerate any carbs, most T2s can have a few carbs.
It all depends what you can personally tolerate or what your glucometer says.

If friends or colleagues cannot accept your lifestyle then they are not your friends and not worth the worry or bother.
I would imagine that some are jealous because all the talk is about you and the rest is peer pressure.

By the way, if eating out, do you ask the staff how your food is cooked or treated. I travel a lot and usually the staff in most places is generally good with regards food.

Most vegetable oils are not conducive to low carb.

Best wishes

Yeah I agree. I mean it just so happens to be that these ppl targeted me when I did manage to lose the weight. I think cos it's such an effort for me to maintain this diet a lot of ppl want to provoke me. Oh yeah, I still get the comments like 'unlike you, I can eat whatever I want.' But I know it's a lie cos I never see those ones eat.

 

[Guzzler]

But I do agree with you. It's just when I see these healthy slim ppl living a long life and eating ****, I just feel silly.

You have to change your mindset. You have a medical condition. Do people with other conditions feel silly?
Of course we would all like to eat and drink like the crowd but we can't, fact. If we choose to do so and become one of those people with uncontrolled diabetes then that is our choice and we cannot then look back and think that we did all we could to avoid the devastating consequences.
You seem to be more upset about what other people think about you and that other people (non diabetics) can eat whatever they choose and get away with it. You must change this attitude to one of acceptance of your diabetes status and stop thinking of all the food you cannot have and start enjoying all the stuff that will keep you healthy.

 

[Robkww]

I tell them about blood sugar spikes which everybody can suffer from, that they can contribute to CVD, Cancer and Dementia and that they are brought on by eating the very things they are suggesting I eat - most of them then get online, do some research and adapt both their eating habits and their attitude to me.

 

[Sean01]

Is anyone else out there struggling socially in relation to their diabetes? Like my own family members are fine with it but almost everyone else out there makes fun of me due to my dietary requirements. Some ppl make fun of me cos I always order a salad or steamed veges as my main meal. They act like I'm super strict with my meals like I'm depriving myself cos they're all eating high carb meals. I get criticism everywhere. Ppl will say things like -
I don't believe you have diabetes, you just want to be skinny.
If you have this ice cream you won't put any weight on.
And why do you need to lose weight?
Carbs are very important. You're not eating any. You are depriving yourself.
I'm worried about your eating, you don't eat enough carbs, here's a chocolate cake.
And why don't you eat chips? Are you special or something.
You won't catch a disease if you have a chip.
I don't understand why ppl diet (whilst looking at me).
You know that salad dressing has more calories than this pasta?
Why can't you eat ice Cream?
That's ok, we can eat our food it's her loss, she's missing out on this food, snob.

When I say I have diabetes problems/sugar problems they don't believe me. Then many ppl will deliberately shove food on my plate cos they can't handle my healthy eating. They see me as a disease cos I can't eat the same as them. They won't accept my explanation of my health condition. They just label me as a health freak snob and then I'm outcast. It happens with almost everyone. I can no longer eat out. Some ppl whisper to each other and say I'm extreme and dumb. Others just roll their eyes and laugh. So far I haven't met anyone who accepts my condition and it makes me feel terrible.

Stand strong and stand tall. You have diabetes and you are doing your best to deal with it. What would you do if you had to give up smoking or alcohol? Exactly! You would not spend time mixing with people in the fag pit outside the office or down the pub.
I'm going to guess that you are a social person - it seems you are surrounded by people who will tell you what they think - so I'm assuming they are not strangers from the other end of the restaurant. (If they are strangers, you're eating in the wrong restaurants.)

These people are not helping you.

If any of my friends said anything like that to me at all, even just once, I would get up and leave, but not before 'loosing it' spectacularly. I'm fighting a disease that is trying to kill me.

In my own life I believe that friendship is about quality, not quantity. Maybe it's time to thin the herd?

Good luck. I hope you can tell that I am very saddened by your plight and that I am on your side.

Sean

 

[jackois]

I suspect that you could solve your problem by changing your social company. Purge the negative ones, the cheeky ones and all those who get on your case and I think you'll find life to be a lot better....

 

[Nicolii]

You have to change your mindset. You have a medical condition. Do people with other conditions feel silly?
Of course we would all like to eat and drink like the crowd but we can't, fact. If we choose to do so and become one of those people with uncontrolled diabetes then that is our choice and we cannot then look back and think that we did all we could to avoid the devastating consequences.
You seem to be more upset about what other people think about you and that other people (non diabetics) can eat whatever they choose and get away with it. You must change this attitude to one of acceptance of your diabetes status and stop thinking of all the food you cannot have and start enjoying all the stuff that will keep you healthy.

This is exactly my problem and the reason I had a 2 year binge on all those foods I couldn't eat. I can't psychologically cope with no longer being able to eat anything and everything like I used to.

One of the problems is that ppl don't believe I have diabetes. They won't accept it. I have being telling friends and my extended family and colleagues and they are all telling me they don't believe me and that I'm a health freak.

 

[Nicolii]

I suspect that you could solve your problem by changing your social company. Purge the negative ones, the cheeky ones and all those who get on your case and I think you'll find life to be a lot better....

I'll do my best. Perhaps I attracted those ppl because I was so overindulgent n the past. But now I can't so it's causing tension.

 

[bulkbiker]

In your position I would have a picture on my phone of an infected foot pre amputation.. when someone says something show them the picture and say "I am avoiding this..."

 

[MikeTurin]

I'm going to guess that you are a social person - it seems you are surrounded by people who will tell you what they think - so I'm assuming they are not strangers from the other end of the restaurant. (If they are strangers, you're eating in the wrong restaurants.)

Problem is two fold - one is that this kind of people is people you can't avoid like parents and relatives, or coworkers.
The other problem is that for a lot of people, like me, to following a diet implies to use tricks like don't having at home pasta and rice or sweets, use homemade salads to eat at work instead to go in a a canteen, to better control cravings and so on.

If Aunt Minnie prepares a big cake and gives you one big slice it's hard to resist sometimes or worse if you go to eat with your parents mum insist to put and prepare a lot of different dishes and prepares some "FOR YOU" and gets upset when you are eating it - is a problem.

 

[Nicolii]

Stand strong and stand tall. You have diabetes and you are doing your best to deal with it. What would you do if you had to give up smoking or alcohol? Exactly! You would not spend time mixing with people in the fag pit outside the office or down the pub.
I'm going to guess that you are a social person - it seems you are surrounded by people who will tell you what they think - so I'm assuming they are not strangers from the other end of the restaurant. (If they are strangers, you're eating in the wrong restaurants.)

These people are not helping you.

If any of my friends said anything like that to me at all, even just once, I would get up and leave, but not before 'loosing it' spectacularly. I'm fighting a disease that is trying to kill me.

In my own life I believe that friendship is about quality, not quantity. Maybe it's time to thin the herd?

Good luck. I hope you can tell that I am very saddened by your plight and that I am on your side.

Sean

Yes I thank you very much and your post made me feel a lot better. You do have a good point and I have to remind myself of this. Thank you.

 

[Guzzler]

This is exactly my problem and the reason I had a 2 year binge on all those foods I couldn't eat. I can't psychologically cope with no longer being able to eat anything and everything like I used to.

One of the problems is that ppl don't believe I have diabetes. They won't accept it. I have being telling friends and my extended family and colleagues and they are all telling me they don't believe me and that I'm a health freak.

Why do they think you are not telling the truth?

 

[BrianTheElder]

The thing that bothers me is that all these ppl who eat the junk food and drink alcohol regularly, they don't have any health problems at all. Like none. My mother in law is the worst. She is an alcoholic who's body has no intolerances to anything. She is 70 and in amazing health. She talks of me like I'm a hypochondriac. I also happen to be allergic to alcohol and so I'm labelled as having something wrong with me. My mum has diabetes too and ppl treat her like she's a disease.

As an ex-alcoholic, I can tell you that it has a severe affect on the liver, a lot of which causes scarring and is irreversible, and probably knocks 20 years off you life. If you're mil is 70, do your sums. 70 is not old these days.

 

[Nicolii]

In your position I would have a picture on my phone of an infected foot pre amputation.. when someone says something show them the picture and say "I am avoiding this..."

This is brilliant!! I definitely find visuals can get the message across better. Thanks heaps.

 

[Nicolii]

Why do they think you are not telling the truth?

They told me they think I'm just trying to lose weight and be skinny and diabetes is a made up excuse. Another told me she thinks I have an eating disorder cos my weight fluctuates.

 

[Nicolii]

Problem is two fold - one is that this kind of people is people you can't avoid like parents and relatives, or coworkers.
The other problem is that for a lot of people, like me, to following a diet implies to use tricks like don't having at home pasta and rice or sweets, use homemade salads to eat at work instead to go in a a canteen, to better control cravings and so on.

If Aunt Minnie prepares a big cake and gives you one big slice it's hard to resist sometimes or worse if you go to eat with your parents mum insist to put and prepare a lot of different dishes and prepares some "FOR YOU" and gets upset when you are eating it - is a problem.

Exactly. Like when I was younger I worked at a cafe. I always packed a healthy lunch. Then one day the boss shoved cake and ice cream in my face. She said I was too skinny and I need to fatten up. I got that a lot when I was slim. Now I'm 30 kilos overweight and ppl are laughing at me. I can't win here.

 

[Nicolii]

Yes true and then there are parties and ppl say geez, you can eat carbs for one night. By that they means, chips chocolate ice cream etc. this is where that amputation photo would come in really handy.

 

[Nicolii]

I tell them about blood sugar spikes which everybody can suffer from, that they can contribute to CVD, Cancer and Dementia and that they are brought on by eating the very things they are suggesting I eat - most of them then get online, do some research and adapt both their eating habits and their attitude to me.

Unfortunately for me these ppl are smart asses who think they have facts in opposition to me. So I don't bother.

 

[chalup]

I am both low carb and gluten free. My friends and family do not eat like I do but they will say to me I want to make such and such, how can we make this work for you? Often it is just throwing in a few extra veggies and a few less potatoes. If it can't be made to work for me I have something else or eat before I go. They have asked why I eat like this and I explained exactly why. It was accepted. That is what true friends do.