Hi Sarah, I don't know what the street life thing you mention is but have you thought of putting a message on to say coffee and a chat and to help you clean? It might sound a bit weird but some people DO just love to clean.....afraid I work on a "clean enough" principle@Phlogiston
Thanks Adam, I agree, online communities are great and I am very busy answering this thread and stuff I put on the heart attack page on Facebook.
One day at a time sounds like a plan. I would like to write a weekly menu and hence shopping list..but I worry that as usual it will all end in the bin and I will get my credit card out for sweet carby shopping in Morrisons. You see with me, it's a comfort for feeling so down all the time.
I always say hello to anyone I pass in the street on the way through to the supermarket. I chat with the checkout staff if they seem friendly, some just want to get their job done and get home. (Don't blame them). I actually like being in my home where I feel safe and I have my cat to keep entertained so I don't get bored. As I mentioned in one of my last replies, I would like it if people would come to my house for a natter. If only I could clean it, I would put out a message on streetlife for people to come for a coffee.
Best wishes to you Adam, and thanks again,
Sarah x
Crikey I didn't realise so many people would reply to me. First of all let me say thanks and I will endeavour to reply to each of you in this post...
@Patricia21
Thanks for your message, and for your kind words.
I am not a church goer, sorry I am a non believer. I went to a spiritualist church once or twice and it stressed me out to be honest although I can't say why.
Why did you move to somewhere where you knew no one, I could never do that, I moved here for a fella.
I would be happy for people to come here and pass the time of day, I like to talk about what's in the news and debate contentious subjects.
Goodness me, how on earth did you get Legionnaires? I am so sorry for you, it must have been hard. I'm sure your friends from church helped you mostly yes?
I know what you mean about nutrition but seriously I do like some good food, just not a lot of it. I mean there are not a lot of foods I enjoy that are healthy but even though I do enjoy them, I can't eat the same things all the time. I don't like a variety of stuff. I was brought up on meat and two veg but now I find it too boring to eat, saying that I have tried new foods but don't like them. I have pledged to write a list of lower carb foods that I do like and hope my dietician will help me slot them into my diet.
Thanks again, best wishes,
Sarah x
I live next to Morrisons so can carry one light bag at a time because I have to get it up two flights of stairs and I get breathless from my heart attack.
Seems if your really want to do something you can!I am fiercely independent to the point of carrying 25 litre bags of cat litter up two flights of stairs 3 weeks after my heart attack, and every time since.
Thank you for taking time to reply to us all ....@Kat100 - I have tried mantras, meditations and affirmations but to no avail. I feel as though I have brain freeze and it's impossible to think positive when in a downward spiral. There are no triggers to make it better again. Thanks for your input though.
@AndBreathe - All the other people in my block work or are out most of the time. The lady downstairs from me who lives alone has just gone missing and when the police came the other I realised I don't even know her name or any of the other residents for that matter. I will rectify that on her return. I will not promise anything these days, I only beat myself up more when I fail. And I always do. I appreciate your input too, thanks.
@Patricia21 - I am sorry you contracted that dreadful disease from a holiday. One usually assumes a holiday will relax you and recharge your batteries.
@Sable_Jan - Streetlife is an online community for ads, sales, events, requests for handymen etc. It operates in your own immediate area, and I think was intended for people to get to know their neighbours. I joined as soon as it was available in my area. I am feeling a bit better today thanks, because of the people taking the time to reply to my thread both here and on a heart attack page on Facebook.
@Alisonjane10 - Thank you for your information, I shall look it up again. I believe I did it once before but found out my nearest centre is in Gateshead which I can't get to. Because I have been so reclusive, I am getting more and more agoraphobic and I would never use public transport or go to a place I don't know. I suffer from panic attacks and when being assessed for PIP the lady from Atos had to come to my home. Thanks for your kind thoughts.
@Lynmi - I have thought about church and there are plenty around here but I have no idea if they are baptist, methodist, CofE or what. I am so ignorant of these matters. I went to a CofE school when aged around 8 - 11. As with not using the Samaritans because of guilt I would be afraid of feeling like I am using people who are church people for their kindness. Sounds mad I know, and it sounds really weird just seeing it black and white but I have always been taught never to owe anyone anything. I am fiercely independent to the point of carrying 25 litre bags of cat litter up two flights of stairs 3 weeks after my heart attack, and every time since.
So guys, once again I am totally thankful of your kindness.
Best wishes, Sarah x
I am feeling a bit better today thanks, because of the people taking the time to reply to my thread
@catherinecherub
Sorry I missed your post earlier.
I am having physio on my shoulder but every time I forget about it and reach I scream in agony, so it feels like it's getting worse. I am doing all the exercises except the ones that hurt too much, but I guess they are the ones I should be concentrating on. I had heard about injections but I am needle phobic and can't deal mentally on my own with no support.
I know someone that had an operation on their back to relieve pain and now they are worse than ever.
<snipped>
I had a frozen shoulder for a long time... GP just wanted to give me pills that made no difference apart from rock solid stools... managed to see a physio, who gave me the exercises... lying on floor and trying to get tips of fingers on floor behind my head with a straight arm was impossible for months... but twice a day little by little.... 2 years later it is still not prefect.... but no pills!!
Wish you well
Hj
Hi. Sarah, how you doing?
Hey everyone. Thanks for checking back with me. I am not doing too well food wise. I am going off more and more food every day. I am not even enjoying cups of tea now and I used to have at least five cups a day. I loved eating out and now I don't like wasting my money. Not really sure what to do next, I just don't like food.
Thanks again for your interest x
@Alisonjane10 , you're clearly a top person as I read the post and was lost for words. Well done you.Hi there,
I honestly don't know what to say that hasn't already been said by the members who've already replied to your initial post. It's clear you are suffering from clinical depression, with several related disorders, such as Agoraphobia, which you've been very honest about. You need help to break that negative cycle mindset. There comes a time when your GP can do no more & the help you need has to come from a Consultant Psychiatrist. Their assessment helps the consultant identify other mental health professionals who may benefit you. This help could be from a Community Psychiatric Nurse, Psychologist, MH Occupational therapist...usually a whole integrated team of these professionals. Domicillary visits are often arranged for people who have difficulties leaving their home, as you've described. You can't go on like this Sarah. You're suffering terribly, & judging by your above post, you're becoming even more poorly. I don't know if you ever got in touch with Mind, as I suggested previously, but that's always an option. Phone support via Mind may be a good start for you. The advisors can guide you, provide options, support you, or simply listen to you. http://www.mind.org.uk Be brave Sarah & seek the help you need. People care. You're not alone. But the members on here can only encourage you to take a positive step...you need to actually do it. Believe me, I know exactly how hard that is...and also how very ill a person with depression can become. You deserve better Sarah, and you can do this with help, support & understanding. You're stronger than you think. Please think about it. I wish you all the very very best.
Ali. X
Hi Sarah, glad you got back to us. Just wondered if you've had any sinus problems of late? Not happened to me for a while but it can't half mess up your taste for things....Hey everyone. Thanks for checking back with me. I am not doing too well food wise. I am going off more and more food every day. I am not even enjoying cups of tea now and I used to have at least five cups a day. I loved eating out and now I don't like wasting my money. Not really sure what to do next, I just don't like food.
Thanks again for your interest x
@Alisonjane10
Thanks for your comments Ali, I appreciate it. I have been depressed for 17 years and I am just about to be discharged again from the mental health team. Therapy doesn't work for me I'm afraid, I have tried everything the professionals have thrown at me to no avail. I have been in touch with Mind on and off for many years. The last time they said I couldn't be seen by them unless on anti-depressants like Prozac, I have tried all different ones but they don't work either.
I understand that the members on here can only encourage and support but I know ultimately I should do something, I just don't know what else to do and can't seem to do anything alone anymore, all my strength has gone now.
@Sable_Jan
Thanks again for your input, funnily enough I have tried two different lots of teabags to no avail, I wonder now if it's the milk that's tainting it for me. I don't have sinus problems but some of the meds I am on give me a very slightly runny nose sometimes, may be it's a simple as that. I can't believe that I have even gone off chips, my favourite food of all time.
Thanks again,
Sarah x
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