I don't want to eat..

[Fallgal]

Thank you Fallgirl for your post, I appreciate you taking the time. I like the idea of writing a list and I will try that with my dietician next time I am there.
I have a couple of 'online friends' but I miss human contact so much. I'd like to pass the time of day with someone, chatting about news and current affairs and such like. The thing is there is someone who enjoys spending time with me but I find him as boring as hell and I would rather be alone than see him. All he does is moan about his life in which he has hobbies/interests, a full time job and parents. All the things I used to enjoy I can't be bothered with now. No one wants to do everything by themselves.

Thanks for being so positive Neil but I can't honestly see a future. When I started this downward spiral, everyone said it wouldn't last forever, better times were around the corner....I didn't think for one minute 17 years later it would be worse.

x

Sarah, what did you like to do before? Would you enjoy them again if you had someone with whom to do them? Are there any clubs, organizations, groups, etc. nearby that share the same hobbies or interests? or maybe an online club/organization that has meetups from time to time? (There seems to be an online forum for every single interest under the sun!) I know online isn't 'human contact' but it might be a first step to meeting new people who share your interests (or what you used to enjoy, and can again). Is there anything you always wanted to try but put off for whatever reason? 48 is very, very young, far too young to throw in the towel and not be interested in anything. In my pea brain I am around 28. I only wish my body would follow suit!

I know it is cliche to say that one feels better after exercise, but even I must admit it is *true*. Twice a week I traipse to town. I go in all but the most severe weather. I will let you in on a little secret (well, you and now the rest of the world, I guess). After considerable hair loss, I now wear a wig full-time. This happened just a couple years ago and I was terrified that it would blow off in the strong winds we get. I did not want my hair (or lack thereof) to keep me a prisoner in my own home! So I pin that sucker down, put on a hat, tie up my hood around it, and go walking when the wind is kicking up gales. I may look like a complete dork but I give zero eff's about what anyone thinks. I do my shopping, talk to all the market stall holders and it really cheers me up. I've gotten to know quite a few people just chatting to them about nothing in particular. It is a shame really that most of the market stall holders are men because I want a gal pal! Still though, it gets me out of the house when I'm not working and I learn a lot and meet a lot of interesting folk. Just last week I stopped to try olive samples and chatted to the guy for a while as he seemed lonely (his stall was a bit away from everyone else's). He ended up giving me a nice portion of olives for free! So I had a nice conversation, made a new acquaintance and scored some low-carb food.

You just need to take that first step (literally)!

 

[AndBreathe]

How do you do your shopping?

 

[Millhouselady]

I used to go to the pub and watch football, exercise, ten pin bowling, days out, pub quiz etc. I find most of those things difficult now with my dodgy arm and hearing things at the quiz. I wish we had a market here. I live next to Morrisons so can carry one light bag at a time because I have to get it up two flights of stairs and I get breathless from my heart attack. There is nothing else around here except the seafront which I would like to walk along if I had some company. Done it enough on my own. Lol. My healthcare professionals don't like me using online communities as they say the information I get is not the same as what they say. And of course they are always right.
I don't have any interests nor do I wish to do anything I've never done.
The reason the wind is such a pain is because it takes my breath away and I don't have enough in the first place. I do feel like my body is falling to bits. Everything just seems too hard, life is too hard but thanks for caring x

 

[daddys1]

In my less depressed days

All I can say Sarah, you are halfway there when you know you are depressed, I have been there, there is always a way up & out of this very deep hole you have got yourself into.

and rather than sit with me people just took the chairs from around the table that I was sitting at. I must repulse everybody.

You know, and I know you will understand this, that when you are depressed, often things end up as 'self fulfilling prophecy' . Being depressed and everybody taking the chairs away, makes you think there's maybe something wrong with you, but if were not depressed you may not have liked what had happened, but you would not of questioned whether it was you that had that effect on the people around you.

Everything just seems too hard, life is too hard but thanks for caring x

Get you sugars right and things will start to improve.

Hoping this is helping a little.

Neil

 

[Bluetit1802]

Blimey ....

 

[jack412]

Thanks for your support everyone, I really do appreciate you taking the time to reply, I am just sorry I can't do the replies justice.
Firstly let me say I have been having therapy on and off for 17 years and it hasn't worked. One therapist even wrote back to my doctor that I couldn't be helped.

it sounds like you taught the therapist a thing or two, they sometines get very full of themselves

I don't like proper food, I have tried fish but can't deal with it, especially if it has bones and/or skin.

I've got good news for you sharks don't have bones and not many people think they're proper food.

I am on yet another tablet for omega three so the dietician is not worried about that. She basically told me that unless I get my head sorted everything will be too much of a mountain to climb. She knows I can't even function most days.
I don't eat berries and nuts as I have gum disease and the bits drive me mad.

I would buy the smooth peanut paste then, don't get the crunchy

Finally, I don't even go out of the flat unless to an appointment, so walking in the high winds is not an option for me exercise wise. I just can't motivate myself to move from the bed or sofa.
So sorry everyone
x

that's ok, I don't walk in to the high winds either. I have it blowing on my back and pushing me along..I can go much further that way..I can get right down to the supermarket, do some shopping and get a bus home

 

[Sable_Jan]

Hi Sarah

I've read all your posts and the replies and there have been some really good suggestions there...... I'm sure its none of it easy to take those first steps again but you've taken the biggest step by sharing how you feel....

I noticed the post where you said that you thought you "repelled" people....that they came and took chairs etc.... Most people are out in their own little groups and really aren't taking much notice of anyone else... they probably wouldn't even pay much notice if the Queen or someone famous were sat there.... too busy caught up in their own little world..... If you get brave enough to go out again like that... if someone comes over to take a chair, look up and smile....you might get one back, you might not but I'd guess that more often than not you would... something small, but a start....

I know this next suggestion may sound extreme but have you tried contacting the Samaritans http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us... I know that people know them for talking people out of suicide but they are Much, Much MORE than that.... they are there for anyone who needs to talk, no matter what about, relationship problems; being bullied; feeling the way you do.... you don't even need to ring them up, they have an email address too.... the people you will talk to (be it email or phone) will know about your local area and what things there may be around to help you....

As others have said, I say the same... you are halfway to solving a problem when your recognise/acknowledge it ... and that's exactly what you have done by talking to us....

A last thought before I go... are you allowed any pets in your flat? A small dog to look after may just change your focus and give you reason to get out and then you won't be by yourself. Training classes would get you and the dog mixing with other people and it is surprising how many people will stop to chat with you when you have a dog......I know, I have 5 German Shepherds..... and if you also got your little dog from a Rescue Centre then you would be saving a life too...

Hoping tomorrow is a better day for you
Jan

 

[Fallgal]

Sarah,

Why don't you start posting on the eating threads, what you had for breakfast, what you're making for tea, etc. As Neil said, as soon as your sugars are under control, you'll feel a lot better. I used to wake up cranky and tired as hell every morning. I slept badly at night and it would take me hours to 'fully' wake up. When I got my sugars under control I felt SOOOO much better. I have loads more energy. I can walk so much better. I am far happier. Please do this for yourself. If you become more active on the forum and post in the various threads, you'll get so much support and help with menus, etc.

Surely you have interests? Do you like films? reading? tv shows? music? photography? Along with making a lit of the low-carb foods you actually enjoy, how about making a list of things that make you happy, no matter how small? I absolutely love the coast; how wonderful you live near the sea Your dream is to live in a mill house and mine is to live near the coast!

Even if you feel everything is utter **** right now, do this for yourself and see how much better you can feel all around when your diabetes is under control. How about making yourself a promise that you will do one positive thing each day for a month and see how it goes? Hugs x

 

[Sable_Jan]

What's an OP?

I've been reading all the posts and have made my considered reply after reading what everyone else had to say.... there was no point me just repeating what others had said.

 

[catherinecherub]

OP = original poster.

We really do not need people arguing about who is offering what as we need to help the OP.

As for the shopping, I expect AndBreathe was wondering if the shopping was done manually or via the internet.

 

[Simon84]

opening poster 2,,dont realy matter a lot tho

 

[donnellysdogs]

The U3A is fantastic for over 50's.. But sorry, don't know OP 's age.
Its cheap and has great opportunitys just even to read a book together and be in different company for a while.

 

[Robinredbreast]

My dream used to be to live in a mill house. Seems a long time ago now.

I don't have any family and only acquaintances, no friends. It's yet another thing I have strived to do but no one seems to care enough to stick around for long. No one understands me and why would they want to. I am very negative and get upset when they tell me to do something that I can't do.

I have no idea where to go from here Neil, so sorry. I feel I am wasting everyone's time. x

Hi, honestly you are not wasting anyone's time, you are not a nothing or a negative person., You are a human being crying out for help, support and guidance. There is a thread called DIABETES BURNOUT and it is a must read and I'm sure you could benefit from it.
Best thing is to just take little steps and just focus on the now. One day at a time, what have I achieved today ? but the thing is you may not see it as an achievement, but when you dig a little deeper you will see the positives and this will bring some meaning to your life.

'What lies behind us and what lies before us, is nothing compared to what lies within us'

Take care and wishing you all the best for a more positive future.
With my very best wishes RRB x

 

[Indy51]

Have you heard of targeted amino acid therapy for neurotransmitter regulation? If not, worth reading either Julia Ross or Trudy Scott.

 

[Fallgal]

Blimey ....

Help out the foreigner here, please. What does this mean in context?

 

[Robinredbreast]

Help out the foreigner here, please. What does this mean in context?

I thought that too ? I wonder how the OP is feeling today ?

 

[Mike d]

I took the "blimey" as a recognition of the challenges so many face in dealing with their condition ....

Mike

 

[Heathenlass]

I took the "blimey" as a recognition of the challenges so many face in dealing with their condition ....

Mike

As did I .

Signy

 

[Bluetit1802]

Help out the foreigner here, please. What does this mean in context?

I took the "blimey" as a recognition of the challenges so many face in dealing with their condition ....

Mike

Yes, something along those lines, Mike. I was expressing my surprise at the difficulties the OP is facing, and how so many good people are trying their best to help her. What a wonderful forum this is.

 

[Natalie1974]

I used to go to the pub and watch football, exercise, ten pin bowling, days out, pub quiz etc. I find most of those things difficult now with my dodgy arm and hearing things at the quiz. I wish we had a market here. I live next to Morrisons so can carry one light bag at a time because I have to get it up two flights of stairs and I get breathless from my heart attack. There is nothing else around here except the seafront which I would like to walk along if I had some company. Done it enough on my own. Lol. My healthcar
e professionals don't like me using online communities as they say the information I get is not the same as what they say. And of course they are always right.
I don't have any interests nor do I wish to do anything I've never done.
The reason the wind is such a pain is because it takes my breath away and I don't have enough in the first place. I do feel like my body is falling to bits. Everything just seems too hard, life is too hard but thanks for caring x

I found myself in a similar position to you now a few years back...the depression took hold and took me down. I was down for a long time, I gained a load of weight, stopped taking care of myself and my diabetes, I lost a whole load of really good friends. It's really not a nice place to be but you can change it..it can and will get better for you.

This may sound a little crazy and I wouldn't normally recommend self help books because they're not really something that I believe in...but someone recommended this book to me whilst I was in the pit of depression and it really helped me to get myself back on track. It's very cleverly written and extremely funny and whether you take it on board or not...you'll laugh your socks off reading it and if even a couple of the points he makes have an effect...that can't be a bad thing.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Get-Gri...TF8&qid=1429173933&sr=8-1&keywords=get+a+grip