I feel helpless. . Someone give me some hope.

[emt1992]

Hello Everyone!

I am a 31 year old F, Wife, Mother and daughter. I’ve had T1D for 29 years of my life. Yes diagnosed at 2 1.2 years old.

Recently I am in transition to switching insulin pumps as my last ones warranty ran out.

Confession. Since becoming a Mom, everything is so much more precious to me. Thus including my quality of life and how much of that life I may or may not have. . . . .

I’m not the healthiest and I haven’t taken the best or worst care of myself. Like any 20-30 year old I wanted to “live” so among those choices I gained weight and am in the 300lbs range and well. . . I’ve reached the point I’m terrified. The switch to my pump has been awful. My sugars are all out of wack and I feel terrible and the mental status of concern (but some would call over thinking) has begun.

I’m terrified I am going to die young and not be able to see my 4 year old next week child get her first boyfriend, graduate high school, walk down the isle or heaven willing, get married to the love of her life.

I just need some hope. I’m staying strong. But I need hope.

How old were you or even someone you know when you were diagnosed with T1D and how many years have you lived with T1D?

I feel like based off internet research I’m doomed. . .

 

[EllieM]

Hi @emt1992 and welcome to the forums

It sounds like changing pumps is very stressful and I feel for you, but as I'm on MDI I'll let the pumpers encourage you about that.
I've been T1 since I was 8 in 1970 (so 53 years) and I can assure you that I've had some periods of truly atrocious control (particularly in my pre glucometer teen years).

I did find my weight went up after childbirth but recently have managed to stop the increase and achieve a small reduction (from obese to overweight) by a combination of lowish carb, exercise and watching the cheese and alcohol.

As far as my diabetic control goes, I have good and less good days. When I have a bad day I just try again the next day, it's all you can do.
Yes there is always hope. If it's any consolation one of friends had a father who was T1 from 2 and he lived to see his grandchildren, despite the fact that he was diagnosed decades before glucometers.

Are you able to talk to someone about your fears, it can help? If not, these forums are a safe place for you to vent, but it can help to talk to someone face to face.

Virtual hugs and enjoy your daughter while she's young. Before you know it she'll be a stroppy teenager and you'll be longing for the days of toddler tantrums.

(My son and daughter are adult now, and teenage stroppiness is long behind them.)

 

[JoKalsbeek]

Hello Everyone!

I am a 31 year old F, Wife, Mother and daughter. I’ve had T1D for 29 years of my life. Yes diagnosed at 2 1.2 years old.

Recently I am in transition to switching insulin pumps as my last ones warranty ran out.

Confession. Since becoming a Mom, everything is so much more precious to me. Thus including my quality of life and how much of that life I may or may not have. . . . .

I’m not the healthiest and I haven’t taken the best or worst care of myself. Like any 20-30 year old I wanted to “live” so among those choices I gained weight and am in the 300lbs range and well. . . I’ve reached the point I’m terrified. The switch to my pump has been awful. My sugars are all out of wack and I feel terrible and the mental status of concern (but some would call over thinking) has begun.

I’m terrified I am going to die young and not be able to see my 4 year old next week child get her first boyfriend, graduate high school, walk down the isle or heaven willing, get married to the love of her life.

I just need some hope. I’m staying strong. But I need hope.

How old were you or even someone you know when you were diagnosed with T1D and how many years have you lived with T1D?

I feel like based off internet research I’m doomed. . .

I know you asked for T1's, and I'm not one... But if you're worried about the weight, maybe this'll help: https://josekalsbeek.blogspot.com/2019/11/the-nutritional-thingy.html It might help shed some weight, just please do not do anything too drastic as you'd hypo with the insulin you're on. Slow and steady, that should make a difference as you go along.

There's a whole lot of T1's here who are older than you are. Everyone has their ups and downs, as life does tend to, you know, happen. It's not all sunshine and roundabouts, sometimes we hit a rough patch. They made it through. You will too. Hang in there!
Hugs,
Jo

 

[Tony337]

Hi
55 and on my 50th year of insulin.
Good shape for my age and last hba1c 42 which is 6.0 in old money.
I suffer from depression and have done for 10 years so i know how tough the world is.

i feel you need help with your head first as all the negativity is eating away at you.
Others are better qualified to advise on pumps and health but i find walking a fantastically simple but effective way to help with fitness........i have analysed my libre to the nth degree whilst out walking and it helps my insulin effectiveness with little effort and you can do as much or as little as you want.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

Tony

 

[JAT1]

I would suggest dealing with your blood sugar readings first. Especially if you reduce your carb consumption in order to stabilize and reduce your blood sugar, your life-expectancy will increase; you may also lose weight and that will help with your mental as well as physical health. My experience is that by keeping to approx 70 carbs per day and prebolusing to avoid spikes keeps me in range and consequently happy.