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struggling big time

DCUKMod said:
I can understand how you might feel, but he seems to have shown some interest at last.

One way I'd ask you to think about it is, if you go and he's unhelpful, you can tell him how disappointed you are in him, just as you stuck to your guns the other day. If you don't go, then nothing will happen, and he could be forgiven for thinking you're not too bothered.

Please do go Ally. It's about time this guy surprised you in the correct way.

Fingers crossed for you.
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I know I have to go but it's just the ifs and buts that I get from my gp. He has never listened to me in the past. Not even doing anything when my psych has suggested in a few letters. If he ignores another professional, what's the chances he will listen to me this time. Even the DN has tried with the meeting with him and not doing anything to her concerns.
I will go and know if I Don, t then I will never know
 
Go @ally1 go. You've done so well recently and hopefully you are that bit stronger to take on your GP. You do know a lot of us here are on your side supporting you.

Best wishes
 
ally1 said:
I know I have to go but it's just the ifs and buts that I get from my gp. He has never listened to me in the past. Not even doing anything when my psych has suggested in a few letters. If he ignores another professional, what's the chances he will listen to me this time. Even the DN has tried with the meeting with him and not doing anything to her concerns.
I will go and know if I Don, t then I will never know
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Ally try to think back to your telephone appointment with him when you didn't let him fob you off, insisting he made the appointment for you. Just think back to that and if necessary do the same in the surgery.

You can do it. I'm sure you can.
 
DCUKMod said:
Ally try to think back to your telephone appointment with him when you didn't let him fob you off, insisting he made the appointment for you. Just think back to that and if necessary do the same in the surgery.

You can do it. I'm sure you can.
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Thank you. Oddly I am better on the phone then talking to him face to face.
He is not the most punctual person. Appt is 10.30 so I know there will be a wait. X
 
Hiitsme said:
Go @ally1 go. You've done so well recently and hopefully you are that bit stronger to take on your GP. You do know a lot of us here are on your side supporting you.

Best wishes
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Thank you. I am better talking on the phone.
He has a way that when you are in his room, at making me feel so uncomfortable that hi start to squirm.
 
ally1 said:
Thank you. I am better talking on the phone.
He has a way that when you are in his room, at making me feel so uncomfortable that hi start to squirm.
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Just stare at him and imagine him constipated and sitting on the toilet. That should do the trick. :)
 
ally1 said:
Thank you. Oddly I am better on the phone then talking to him face to face.
He is not the most punctual person. Appt is 10.30 so I know there will be a wait. X
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I'd suggest you take a few notes with you to help you remember what you want to talk about. I think we've all walked out of the consulting room, only to remember something that was important we mention.

If he's not looking to do anything, you could ask him how you are to manage to live your life, unable to be confident of being able to stay on your feet. There's a safety issue here.

The other thing you might like to consider trying (again, if he's not looking to do anything) is to ask him what he would do if he were in your shoes. That can be a very, very powerful question.

If he's saying something like, I'd just toddle home and get on with my life, your response should be short and sweet. It should be "Really?", then keep quiet and wait for him to speak next.

Ally, all of this must be so, so frustrating for you. I'd be so angry with him, if it were me. I can only imaging it impacts your mental health. I don't know when you next see your psych, but if nothing happens tomorrow, maybe you should consider asking your psych the same question - what would he do in your shoes. He may have ideas for raising the profile of this to acceptable level that we don't understand.

In certain circumstance Consultants car make a Consultant to Consultant referral, which bypasses the GP. They don't like doing it, and much prefer everything to go via your GP, but they can do it. I was told this by a Consultant Opthalmologist, albeit in a social situation. I have known the person who told me this for years, and I would trust what he says.

Ally, I keep my fingers crossed for you. If I were closer, I'd offer to come along for moral support. You deserve so much better.
 
DCUKMod said:
I'd suggest you take a few notes with you to help you remember what you want to talk about. I think we've all walked out of the consulting room, only to remember something that was important we mention.

If he's not looking to do anything, you could ask him how you are to manage to live your life, unable to be confident of being able to stay on your feet. There's a safety issue here.

The other thing you might like to consider trying (again, if he's not looking to do anything) is to ask him what he would do if he were in your shoes. That can be a very, very powerful question.

If he's saying something like, I'd just toddle home and get on with my life, your response should be short and sweet. It should be "Really?", then keep quiet and wait for him to speak next.

Ally, all of this must be so, so frustrating for you. I'd be so angry with him, if it were me. I can only imaging it impacts your mental health. I don't know when you next see your psych, but if nothing happens tomorrow, maybe you should consider asking your psych the same question - what would he do in your shoes. He may have ideas for raising the profile of this to acceptable level that we don't understand.

In certain circumstance Consultants car make a Consultant to Consultant referral, which bypasses the GP. They don't like doing it, and much prefer everything to go via your GP, but they can do it. I was told this by a Consultant Opthalmologist, albeit in a social situation. I have known the person who told me this for years, and I would trust what he says.

Ally, I keep my fingers crossed for you. If I were closer, I'd offer to come along for moral support. You deserve so much better.
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Thank you.
Funnily enough I had a letter today with an appt with my psych on 11th May
 
Hello Ally,

Please go to your appoint as @DCUKMod says above, if you don't go all the progress you have made will go by the wayside. I find that if I am heading into a difficult meeting (of any kind), I make a note of what I want to discuss and the result I would like to see. That will keep you focused if you feel a bit nervous and if the doctor doesn't listen to you, you have a written record for any future complaints.

I hope it all goes well and you have lots of good things to tell us tomorrow.

P x
 
Hey @ally1 - not going is not an option after finally getting him to listen. Go and he might actually help this time. Let us know how it goes.
 
Providence 62 said:
Hello Ally,

Please go to your appoint as @DCUKMod says above, if you don't go all the progress you have made will go by the wayside. I find that if I am heading into a difficult meeting (of any kind), I make a note of what I want to discuss and the result I would like to see. That will keep you focused if you feel a bit nervous and if the doctor doesn't listen to you, you have a written record for any future complaints.

I hope it all goes well and you have lots of good things to tell us tomorrow.

P x
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Thank you.
Am a quivering wreck at the moment.
 
@ally1 i'm with you. In spirit.

The more you see this GP the more familiar you will be to him. A better patient Dr relationship can develop.

I'm guilty of assuming my familiar gp understands me well and he knows everything.
Put it this way if my partner doesn't what chance has my gp?

The more you see him the more comfortable you'll feel to see him again.
You'll start noticing his ways, hence how best to get him to listen.
Remember, we are all human.

What's the worst he can do?

Nothing?
What til you make another appointment to see him about the same condition/illness? Giving himself more work.
Not many people voluntarily give themselves MORE work.
He'll listen.

Make it easy for him. Tell him what you think he could do for you.
Sometimes they're not in your shoes, as mentioned above.
Describe your difficulties, twice or three times if you feel he didn't hear or respond.

I have full confidence in you @ally1
You will smash this.

A list/notes is an excellent idea too.

I will be on-line for you.
This is going to be easy.

Notes in hand. Maybe pen to write down his reply if you want to remember better.
Don't leave til list all answered, to your satisfaction.

If waiting around alot take your phone, on silence and see us here. Waiting for you. ;)
 
ickihun said:
@ally1 i'm with you. In spirit.

The more you see this GP the more familiar you will be to him. A better patient Dr relationship can develop.

I'm guilty of assuming my familiar gp understands me well and he knows everything.
Put it this way if my partner doesn't what chance has my gp?

The more you see him the more comfortable you'll feel to see him again.
You'll start noticing his ways, hence how best to get him to listen.
Remember, we are all human.

What's the worst he can do?

Nothing?
What til you make another appointment to see him about the same condition/illness? Giving himself more work.
Not many people voluntarily give themselves MORE work.
He'll listen.

Make it easy for him. Tell him what you think he could do for you.
Sometimes they're not in your shoes, as mentioned above.
Describe your difficulties, twice or three times if you feel he didn't hear or respond.

I have full confidence in you @ally1
You will smash this.

A list/notes is an excellent idea too.

I will be on-line for you.
This is going to be easy.

Notes in hand. Maybe pen to write down his reply if you want to remember better.
Don't leave til list all answered, to your satisfaction.

If waiting around alot take your phone, on silence and see us here. Waiting for you. ;)
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Thank you.
I have been with this surgery nearly 16 years and have seen him since I joined.
Over the years, he has been good but with him, it's that he is so hard to get anything done.
 
ally1 said:
Thank you.
I have been with this surgery nearly 16 years and have seen him since I joined.
Over the years, he has been good but with him, it's that he is so hard to get anything done.
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Well it's time he did hun.
Be persistent like posters have encouraged. He will have to do something if those tablets arnt working. He might try something else. Of course you're like me some meds aren't other med friendly but that doesn't mean he shouldnt try nothing.
Emphasis the fact your falling hun too.
It difficult for them to see how well your walking when you walk in using a few steps to reach gp.
My old gp used to come to waiting room to collect us. They saw more.
I think should be common practice unless gp unable.
 
Am home now. Well sort of good outcome.
As usual was 40 minutes late going in.
Explained everything, I couldn,t stop.
He has upped the gabapentin. He said to see what physio says tomorrow, and to emphasise falling over and to see if or what walking aids I need. If I get no joy from physio then to see gp again.
Talked about my dry mouth and hoarseness when talking. I did explain since stopping the bladder med that dry mouth is a bit better.
I need to see how that goes over the next month to 6 weeks then to go back. Then he will review where or what to do next.
Thank you all for help and encouraging me to go
 
So pleased to hear this. A good start and hopefully will lead to some improvement for you.
 
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