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Terminal and Scared

Discussion in 'Diabetes Complications' started by kman, Nov 1, 2013.

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  1. Andy12345

    Andy12345 Type 2 · Expert

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    i though we was talking about fruit? :angelic:
     
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  2. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Not True. FB Sqeezed my Melon ... then left me to Sqeeze my own. And MID died of shock
     
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  3. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    No. Only the. FRUITY !
     
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  4. fatbird

    fatbird · Well-Known Member

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    ****!

    FB
     
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  5. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    You.know me too well FB, LOL !
     
  6. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    To show you I'm no hero, and the reality of what such badly controlled Diabetes leads too, between my previous two posts the pain got out of control, and I got grumpy and snappy and morbid, Daynes away for the weekend, so just Wendie and me, she took the brunt of my inability to cope, and I took it all out on her,

    I'm not proud of it, I'm not happy about it, I just can't control myself, even now it's 1:43 am. And I still can't sleep, 60% pain, 40% guilt, But that is NEVER Ever an excuse, or Forgivable,

    Wendie always forgives me, She LOVES Me ! How she can put up with me I don't understand, DON'T Forgive me, Don't let me off or put it down to the pain, Don't make a hero of me, Wendie does that enough already, just know it's not just the physical pain and the dying, it's not just the Body, that out of control diabetes destroys, it's the soul, it's who you are, it's the beauty in your life,,

    I pray I Die before I kill my marriage, before I hurt Wendie more than she can just brush off, I may never ever have been violent, but my words cut my Angel every time the pain takes over, I have to fight to keep my self in control, I have to love back like Wendie always does,

    DON'T Do this to your Family, DON'T Be me, DON'T Go down my road, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE UNDERSTAND.
     
    #306 kman, Jan 11, 2014 at 1:57 AM
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 11, 2014
  7. Mud Island Dweller

    Mud Island Dweller Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Wendie is also the looser she will loose you so if she gets pleasure in forgiving you take that to help take your guilt away remember she doesn't have long to do that to your face, it isn't your pain moods she loves but your heart,

    To make your problem worse and is to late to change.... it grew by every reader we love you in our own way because every post you put you try to change a life by making someone look at themselves. That is some big heart... while you are dying, scared and in pain, you care enough about people you never met to say "hey l am here don't join me", After you are gone your words will stay....lets see what isnt for any of us to love.
     
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  8. CollieBoy

    CollieBoy Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    kman,
    sorry youre wrong. Heroes don't live gold plated , jewel encrusted lives. they have faults, realise them and work their b*llocks off to try to do the best for everyone despite their faults. You are closer to a hero than you realise. Hope i could be as good in your situation.
     
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  9. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Has anyone ever told you your an ANGEL, I still don't believe i should be forgiven, but you put my soul in a better place, Thank You Dear Friend !
     
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  10. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Fergus, i don't know how I can thank you properly, but your reality check helped more than you can know, I am still far from a hero, but I can only hope I'm no monster either, Thank You again my freind,
     
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  11. CollieBoy

    CollieBoy Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    whether you believe it or not that you should be forgiven, others whether it be "the big man" or your family, or friends can (and will) see your redeeming features and celebrate them.
     
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  12. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Thanks Fergus, Whatever I believe, it's nice that people are still out there reading the thread,
     
  13. richard256

    richard256 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    HEY EVERYONE IS DIEING
     
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  14. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Well I certainly am. LOL. !
     
  15. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Morning All, have a rotten headache, but other pain only moderate
     
    #315 kman, Jan 12, 2014 at 8:31 AM
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 12, 2014
  16. Mud Island Dweller

    Mud Island Dweller Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Sounds a good move given your recent "exploits" see ..... Take this forum 3 times a day on fire and your pain will improve :happy:
     
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  17. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Hehehe LOL are you saying we got a little out of hand here on the thread MUD ? Next time we'll get drunk instead ,( only Joking ... Honest ! ),
     
  18. Mud Island Dweller

    Mud Island Dweller Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Out of hand not a chance... should see me out of hand no on second thoughts don't see me out of hand l am embarrassing giggling out of control then fall asleep..

    Brian always said I am a cheap date......about half a glass of wine and l fall over giggling... then fall asleep
     
  19. kman

    kman Type 1 · BANNED

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    Hehehe.. ..... I'm a cheep date too LOL. ... I only ever have 1. drink a year at Christmas !
     
  20. BramHall456

    BramHall456 · Active Member

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    Kman Im 75 and have terrible neuropathy.read your thread and know how you feel. Trouble is no body in the medical proffesion cares.note you are plyed with drugs which no doubt have horrible side effects.just where do we go from here. Food manufacturers shove suger in everything. Wish they suffered like we do. Inparticulare the kids are having it shoveled down their throats. Tony

    Sent from the Diabetes Forum App
     
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