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Type 1 diabetes rant :). ( revised title ). DIABETES RANT.

Discussion in 'Diabetes Discussions' started by Anaelena, May 29, 2015.

  1. Pipp

    Pipp Type 2 · Expert
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    Yes, it is a brilliant rant. Not quite the best ever, but close. I am sort of wondering if my contributions on this thread have been helpful. After all, they seem to have provided further annoyances to be ranted about. Just so it is clear to everyone, I state openly (in preference to a PM to the OP, as I am not sure if that could be misconstrued) my intentions in participation here were not intended to inflame. Perhaps my intended empathy for Anaelena has come across as antagonistic? My mention of @nosher8355's blog and the fact that he doesn't complain was in relation to Anaelena mentioning that it is hard to listen to older people complain about neuropathy, was purely because I know how old nosher is, and he has trouble enough with his medical condition, but I actually admire the way nosher does not complain. (And as a resident of Wirral and supporter of Tranmere Rovers, well he has good cause to whine) ;) @Anaelena it was not a suggestion that I thought you were complaining. As I said, I am full of admiration for someone who has overcome such obstacles. I mean, you have had all that pain and suffering, but have been able to have a 20 year career in nursing. That is some achievement. Also that you have two beautiful boys. Something else to be proud of.

    Anaelena you have said you don't want me to compete with you, and I won't. I am not sure if you meant you have 'gastroparesis', rather than 'gastropaesis' I do know about the former. It is hell on earth, and if that is what you have you have even more of my sympathy. You also said you didn't want me to ignore you. I am trying not to. I have wished you peace and wish you well. Not ignoring you, but not wishing to engage in a conversation where what I say is taken in the wrong context either. I won't be hurt, because just like having immunity to being made to feel inferior by people who do not know me I have built up immunity to people who want to hurt me with words too. Once again I say I have empathy for your need to rant, but I will not have my good intentions and attempt to empathise be used as anything other than intended.


    We all need to rant and let off steam from time to time. So hope ranting here helps. Very different to complaining.

    Peace to you, and be well.
     
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  2. LucySW

    LucySW Type 1.5 · Well-Known Member

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    Dear Anaelena, My God it sounds hard. Well done you for managing, however you do it, to keep on going and have a life and family and be there. All power to you, and love too tho I don't know you. Well done, and live.
     
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  3. Mrsass

    Mrsass Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    @Anaelena omg number 5 had me howling!!!!! When people say something like that to me I do not understand what the hell they expect me to reply with... Oh wow that's amazing... Oh yeah I'm expecting my leg to drop off in 20 years... Might lose my sight before then but wayhey, that's life... I'm not a violent person but i do get the urge to punch 'those people'
     
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  4. Anaelena

    Anaelena Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Right ? It almost dehumanizes us and with a prediction of the worse to come . Like , hello ??? I am a human with actual feelings. Do you realize what you just said to me ? Lol
     
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  5. conniecar

    conniecar Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Oh that first post is like the script of my 70's childhood and beyond ! Ace ! I just wish the Daily Mail would stop headlining diabetics as collapsing the NHS. Even my mother in law believes the hype, and has questioned me closely on how 'bad' I am? "Well, how bad do you want me to be?" I've been a prickly, defensive type 1 since 1976 so I've wanted to rant openly for a long time. I work with a lady who bores everyone to death with her symptoms daily, and she's doing me no favours. She went home ill recently and I was firmly told that her diabetes must be worse than mine, as she really struggles with it. I always tell her I'm a Sagittarius first, and the other stuff is an inconvenience ( epilepsy is a biggy - bit I've not told her as it looks like I'm competing). Inside obviously I'm wanting to be violent. A little bit of info seems to have created a nation of experts, but I wouldn't try to spout about MS, Parkinsons, Asthma, Coeliac Disease, because I'm ignorant and it'd be hurtful to try to talk to someone with these conditions,and TELL THEM IT'S THEIR FAULT !!!!! Thank You, I'm off to read the Daily Mail and eat a packet of digestives xxxx
     
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  6. RuthW

    RuthW Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    I knew a woman who died of breast cancer and towards the end she said that the number of people who said or implied that she must have in some way "caused" it (by not having a baby and breastfeeding, by eating the "wrong things", etc) almost caused her as much pain as the prospect of dying shortly.

    It's called "The Just World Theory". When people encounter suffering and death, they feel afraid and console themselves by creating the delusion for themselves that there is justice in the here-and-now. If you are suffering, you did something wrong or stupid. I don't do wrong or stupid things, so it can't happen to me. It's a psychological defense.

    Oddly, extremely religious people often DON'T do this because they believe justice comes in the hereafter, not now. Part of the purpose of the world for them is suffering and helping each other. Of course, that depends a bit on the individual character too.

    I just recognize that the person who said the stupid thing is in fact afraid, and speak to them gently and tell them how it's not so bad really. Their fear hurts them more than my diabetes hurts me.
     
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  7. kirstiemarie91

    kirstiemarie91 Family member · Well-Known Member

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    Absolutely love this!
    *Air high five*
    Never a truer word spoken!
    :) x
     
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  8. conniecar

    conniecar Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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  9. conniecar

    conniecar Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    This has been an ace post ! Like a few I've sometimes resented type 2's, especially when I was a teenager and didn't want embarrassing hypos, wanted to drink copiously and not have to eat at designated times. I wanted to be like everyone else and well meaning people saying 'do you need to eat?' when I was trying to be witty (!) or 'you won't be able to eat this, so I'll not ask' didn't help. But my mum is type 2 and hasn't the freedom that I have in loads of ways. Her diet only regime can't be counteracted by an extra jab, even at Christmas it stays firm. I've seen her have to deny herself in lots of social situations where I've indulged. She's a petite size 10 and is very healthy ( my profile pic is her and Dad by my beloved Morris Minor, Connie ( best reason to keep my eyes healthy ) My life of course would be easy if I could just jab 3 times a day, and get on with it. But as we know, it's a balancing act. I'm off this week and have had perfect tests, but as soon as my work in a school kicks in you can bet they won't be. Who wants to be hypo in front of 30 teenagers so I run a bit higher. We're all sick of trying to tell doctors the obstacles we face, and fed up of being told I 'could do better'. Two years ago a consultant said I'd done incredibly well after 38 years and made me cry. That many years of anger, misunderstanding and frustration take their toll, and I told him that was the first positive I'd ever had. He was amazed. So.....forgotten what I was supposed to be saying now? Anyway, whatever type you are it's hard and a little bit of knowledge from the public has made it harder at times ( even when I was pregnant the midwives got confused ) but it is a complex thing. If I could live in a cave and not be bombarded by relatives,the public, school kids and Haribo ( who puts them by the till at the garage anyway? ) life would be dandy. Good luck to you all
     
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  10. Emmotha

    Emmotha Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    I hate the "I couldn't do that" comment re injections.

    I mean really??

    I just say "well you'd be dead pretty quickly then" in a nonchalant manner. Lol.

    If they then wish to continue the conversation I explain that it could happen to them, or anyone else with a needle phobia and than diabetes (type 1 or 2) doesn't only specifically target those who are ok with needles.

    Like we have all said, you just have to suck it up and get on with it as best you can!

    I do wonder if they'd say the same to a drug addict if they met one - it's not like we're embarking on a recreational activity
     
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  11. RuthW

    RuthW Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Number 5. Yesterday a friend of mine called me and after discussing some other stuff, she suddenly said, "Aunty Ruth, you know my old neighbour, well she has the diabetes, and last week they gave her an operation and they cut off her, what is it called, you know, her foot finger. But why? Why, Aunty Ruth?" And so on, for quite a while.

    In-between much stifled laughter, I spent several futile minutes trying to explain to her that we were talking about a "toe" but the impromptu language lesson bore no fruit at all. So I addressed her concerns, explained how high blood sugar damages the heart and blood vessels causing poor circulation, culminating in unhealed injuries/infections, and possible amputations, etc. I went on to tell her all the other nasty things that could possibly happen to me. And then reminded her of how much I walk and exercise (which, though twenty plus years younger she has always found very eccentric of me) and that this is the reason why, and she proved very receptive to the explanation.

    She was very distressed by her neighbour's losing her foot finger and very concerned it could happen to me. This girl is from Tchad and very open in expressing her feelings, so it was clear that it was concern (near panic, in fact) that led to the question. Maybe English people (famous for our reserve, wary of "interfering") are having the same feelings when they say the dreaded Number 5?

    All the way through the conversation I was laughing because I was thinking of this discussion! Plus, the final irony, this girl has schizophrenia and she's worrying about me! When I first met her she was off her meds and wrecking her family life. I convinced her to take them ("Why are you moaning about a few pills? I take four or five injections a day?" " But, Aunty, I want to be normal." "When you take them, you ARE normal.") and she really has been very well ever since. So my punchline was, "You see, I told you this ages ago. What YOU have usually gets better as you get older. What I have usually gets worse. So that's why I try so hard." (Underlying lesson: Be grateful and keep taking the tablets, my dear!")

    Some illnesses are more stigmatized than diabetes. Many worse and much more hurtful comments are made to people with mental illness, which is just as genetic and "undeserved" as diabetes, but harder to cope with sometimes because you primarily use your mind to develop coping skills and people with SMI are often more isolated than us. I think you can't expect understanding and destigmatization unless you offer it too.
     
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  12. Anaelena

    Anaelena Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    A rant is a rant is a rant. Some people have diabetes and mental illness . In fact some of us ranting here may. Not sure it matters. I am not about to psychoanalyze every person I come into contact with and try to understand why they say the things they do. I would die of exhaustion. I don't understand why a rant cannot be a rant without having to play the other side , to me it shows a lack of compassion . Sorry . As I said previously this is not about competition. Of course there are diseases out there that are much worse but I am not here to talk about those . I am here to rant on Diabetes . It is strange to me that this offensive to so many here . I already edited my rant to accommodate. Now I am being told
    "you can't expect understanding and destigmatization unless you offer it too" that seems like an assumption. I feel this rant now needs its own rant !
     
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    #72 Anaelena, Jun 20, 2015 at 7:17 AM
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 20, 2015
  13. Emma1990

    Emma1990 Type 1 · Member

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    This was only meant as a rant for a type 1 diabetic. Should we all just sit in a corner and not speak for fear of offending type 2's. We're all struggling with a difficult but not unmanageable disease. Why do people take such offence so quickly??!! The whole point of this forum is to be supportive of others is it not?
     
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  14. Anaelena

    Anaelena Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    It seems so. As a kid I was told to suck it up . It isn't so bad ... now I am a loud mouth adult and will not :p
     
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  15. Robinredbreast

    Robinredbreast Type 1 · Oracle

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    Amen ;)
     
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  16. Robinredbreast

    Robinredbreast Type 1 · Oracle

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    Just read through a few of the posts and it is good to see a rant about Type 1 and why not ? This is a supportive forum for all diabetes types and I have made a few type 2 friends on here who are just great( type 1's as well) :)<3. Not because they are type 2, but because of their personalities. I try to be supportive to all types,as we all do, but we are just a tiny minority, about 10% of the diabetes population and airing concerns, moans and the occasional rant is bl***y well good for the diabetes soul, good one OP:D
     
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    #76 Robinredbreast, Jun 20, 2015 at 9:05 AM
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 22, 2015
  17. RuthW

    RuthW Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    I liked your rant, Anaelena. I said so, I thought it was very funny. Maybe it wasn't supposed to be funny but it was for me. But this is an open board. It is not specifically yours. There is no unspoken rule that you get to say whatever you think, but nobody else can respond with what they think too. But I didn't think your rant was offensive.

    I am older than you, though, and while I used to feel like you when I was younger, I got over it about twenty years ago. It's no use being stuck in your anger at the disease and other people's reactions, in my opinion. Anger (and a rant, and your latest reaction to my comment expresses nothing else) is not a pleasant or healthy feeling in the long term. And since we are not going to get rid of our diabetes, we'd probably better get rid of the anger. That's my stance. And I'm allowed to say so, Anaelena.

    Plus, I am in my fifties, and fitter, slimmer, healthier than 95% of the other women I meet my age. That's because I have taken great care of myself compared with most people BECAUSE OF my diabetes. I found a plus in it. Likewise, I find a plus in all the friends I have made, some wonderful people, who are also marginalized or stigmatized in some way by society because of their disability or some other factor. I might not have looked at them, considered them as friends had I been able to fit into some Aryan ideal of the "perfect body".

    I am actually happy to have diabetes. I'm loud and proud. Delighted to be Diabetic.
     
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    #77 RuthW, Jun 20, 2015 at 11:12 AM
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 20, 2015
  18. Scandichic

    Scandichic Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    I am glad you have brought up the issue of insensitivity as I find your remarks both insensitive and offensive. Do you really believe that people have to experience things to empathise? As has already been pointed out, diabetes is an awful disease whether T1 or T2 and we should be united in our collective battle not trying to create us and them situations.
    @Anaelena your post made me smile. I am T2 but have also encountered some horrendous prejudices along the way. You sound like a bright, intelligent feisty woman. Hugs to youxxx
     
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  19. Scandichic

    Scandichic Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    What happened after the flight? What an awful, terrifying experience that must have been.
     
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  20. kevinfitzgerald

    kevinfitzgerald Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    This my first post on this thread but I have read through it from start to where we are now.

    Everything is relative to the individual regardless of type, complications, other illnesses, age, social standing, housing, politics, religious or non religious belief, gender or sexual orientation (this list being totally non exhaustive!)

    I have absolutely no idea how my opinions and personal experiences will be perceived by others on this forum when I post something and vice versa.

    However I do know that so long as what I post is true to me (and not intentionally meant to hurt or upset others) then the perceptions, interpretations and reactions of others to what I have posted is not my responsibility. It is theirs !

    I do try to remember though that if I had walked in the shoes of those that may have irritated or angered me would I not think or have the same perception as they do now and that is why I say it is all relative. We are all different and ultimately unique in the way we view things.

    I posted something a few weeks ago and got a post back that upset me regarding what I had posted and there were a couple of exchanges but all was good and it ended with no hard feelings. It happens in everything we do in all areas of life and this will be ongoing always.

    I fail miserably at times but I do try to concentrate on how I react to things rather than concentrating on the things I'm reacting to.

    Guarantee that even if no one responds to this post it will have wound someone up but I have not meant it to upset anyone so if it has I will still sleep well tonight ! :)
     
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