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Where on earth to start?

JoKalsbeek said:
I don't know what to say. I'm short for time this morning, with strikes and the papers promising bad weather as well as we head out to my mom's oncology appointment. But I've been reading your comments, and for the first time in what seems like a long time, I allowed myself to just cry for a bit. (If something teary wells up I usually get rid of it right quick.). I needed that more than I thought I did. It took some of the pressure off, it seems.

Thank you. I've missed you, but thought I had nothing constructive to add anymore. Just felt so angry all the time, so lost. Thank you for shining a little light my way. Just... Thank you. I love you all.
Jo
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Sending positive vibes your way for your challenges today. Crying is good for us. I can understand your anger. What you are going through is hard.
 
HSSS said:
The bit about kidney stones - was it established as fact the stones were uric acid or was it an educated guess? If it was the latter can you get it confirmed or refuted conclusively in case the carnivore option could still be open if in fact they are oxalate. Can you get some medicinal help with the diabetes, and very very understandable low mood? I always fight against these trying to do it al on my own but I’m not so sure we always should. Sometimes a temporary bit of help can get us through the worst moments til we can resume the fight alone later when the worst has past.
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I kept meaning to come back to this, but things just keep piling up. As they do tend to do, eh... I'm sorry things have been doing the same for you, and I do hope you're hanging in there...

...Anyway, yes, it's uric acid. Entirely. I was told to just go with the assumption that it was calcium-oxalate, as about 80% or the stones are made up of that, but of course, mine have to be a rare breed. ;) Took them months to get the results, as the first test failed. In the meantime I started testing myself and my urine was quite acidic, all the time. Allopurinol gave me migraines, so I'm sticking with sodium bicarb and veg to get more alkaline. The foods that would help most are problematic, either because of the bladderpain I got stuck with post-vaccination, or because they're just too high in carbs. So I'm drinking 2 to 3 liters of water a day now, trying to keep stones from forming again, and very carefully adding a little more animal protein into my diet again. Just now, it hopefully won't crystalise with all the water coming on through. If it does, well, I still have enough morphine to get through this experiment, should it fail miserably and new ones form.

My blood sugars seem okay, still in the normal range, but I've had them lower than this. No medication needed just yet. And as for the depression, well... Medication's never been an option for that, alas. (Constant migraines, increased suicidal thinking, worsening Sjögrens). I've tried them all, some months, some years, and it always made things worse. So I'll just have to hang in there as-is. I try to go outside as regularly as I can, try and keep my head up. Bit hard right now as I picked up mom's new meds after her appointment with the oncologist... And got C19 again in the bargain, as everyone there was sick, from staff to patients. Can't go outside for a bit, I'm isolating. But once I'm up and running I'll be taking pictures of the neighbourhood cats again. It helps.

I'm going to give it all a go.... The diet changes, the buckets of water, the going out there and let the wind get rid of the cobwebs.... It's slow going, but I'll get there.

Hugs, and thank you,
Jo
 
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