Disappointed in myself, how do I fix this?

[Mrsmac247]

Sorry to come back posting after so long with negativity, I have no where else to go and feel helpless. I was diagnosed in 2016 as T2 and recommended medication. Thankfully I found this forum and managed within a few months to get my HBA1C levels into just below pre diabetic range without medication. I felt like i had done the impossible! Then in a false sense of security I slowly started eating foods which I knew were not for me but thought 'it's ok, I can change this'.

For about a year I was doing ok, gained a little weight but felt ok, I stopped testing - big mistake. Fast forward and between mid 2017 and early 2018, I had 2 significant losses; a mother figure and my mother in law and 2 other losses; an uncle and an aunt...they all had diabetes and passed of related illnesses. I developed a rather useful skill (so I'm told) at arranging funerals but the mental impact was out of this world. I hated diabetes yet my consumption of food became erratic, convenient and self loathing.

Enter the 6 monthly diabetic check! As I thought, I was back on the T2 radar, the bottoms of my feet hurt and I am trying desperately to get back on the wagon and have sort of gone into a panic about diets and foods (if you are using diet please see my other thread in weight loss and diets!)

Has anyone ever fallen so badly? How do you move forward as I feel stuck! Does that mean that my feet are now permanently ruined? The first time around the pains went, this time they haven't.

 

[ianf0ster]

Sorry to come back posting after so long with negativity, I have no where else to go and feel helpless. I was diagnosed in 2016 as T2 and recommended medication. Thankfully I found this forum and managed within a few months to get my HBA1C levels into just below pre diabetic range without medication. I felt like i had done the impossible! Then in a false sense of security I slowly started eating foods which I knew were not for me but thought 'it's ok, I can change this'.

For about a year I was doing ok, gained a little weight but felt ok, I stopped testing - big mistake. Fast forward and between mid 2017 and early 2018, I had 2 significant losses; a mother figure and my mother in law and 2 other losses; an uncle and an aunt...they all had diabetes and passed of related illnesses. I developed a rather useful skill (so I'm told) at arranging funerals but the mental impact was out of this world. I hated diabetes yet my consumption of food became erratic, convenient and self loathing.

Enter the 6 monthly diabetic check! As I thought, I was back on the T2 radar, the bottoms of my feet hurt and I am trying desperately to get back on the wagon and have sort of gone into a panic about diets and foods (if you are using diet please see my other thread in weight loss and diets!)

Has anyone ever fallen so badly? How do you move forward as I feel stuck! Does that mean that my feet are now permanently ruined? The first time around the pains went, this time they haven't.

Hi Mrsmac247,
No need to apologise for asking for help and support when you obviously need it!
The whole purpose of these Forums (as far as I am concerned) is to educate, help and support Diabetics.

I'm using LCHF and Intermittent Fasting by 'eating to my meter'. But I'm still near the beginning of my journey.

Most people using mainly diet, or diet alone fall off the wagon from time to time. The longer you have stayed on the wagon in a sustainable way, the easier it should be to get back on it. By this I mean adopting a dietary lifestyle which allows you to eat both pleasurable and healthy food in sufficient quantity so that you do not feel hungry!

It appears that you were doing LCHF in the past. This may be a suitable lifestyle for you but if it isn't and you find Keto, Carnivore or Intermittent Fasting easier, then switch to one of those - they all 'work' for those who can maintain them!

Even Dr David Unwin had a T2 patient (in his late 80s) who fell off the wagon with dietary 'carb creep'. But once he was given the Unwin chat this man managed to get back on LCHF, reduce his HbA1C even lower than before and improve both his weight and his health immeasurably.

A French gentleman ( or at least using a French sounding name) recently posted in here that he'd achieved remission of T2D and Retinopathy and Neuropathy using LCHF after approx 25yrs as a T2D being on Insuilin (which made him gain an extra 30lbs on top of already being obese) and having such neuropathy that he lost his big toe to the disease!

He is living proof that it is possible to achieve remission from T2D no matter how bad it is - the only limits being amputation or death.

You can do this!

 

[SaskiaKC]

I feel stuck too.
I was diagnosed T2 about a year and a half ago. I went on Metformin and started eating a LCHF diet. First A1C after being on that a few months was great! I lost about 20-25 pounds. Doctor was happy. I was happy.
About 6 more months went by and I went in for blood work and while my A1C was still great, like my weight, my LDL cholesterol was horrible. Doctor recommended quitting LCHF and trying the DASH diet. Also prescribed a statin.
Now, 18 months after diagnosis, I have gained 10 pounds back, LDL number isn't great, A1C was OK but not as good at it had been on the LCHF diet. I got discouraged and started indulging in too many bad foods -- mostly pastries -- too many carbs and too much sugar. Not bingeing, just "treating myself" on occasion.
Just this morning I decided that the way forward, for me, may be to try LCHF again. I am more worried about LDL than A1C now, but being overweight isn't any more heart-healthy than bad LDL numbers are, and I may try risking a higher LDL in hopeful exchange for a lower A1C and weight.
This isn't a good time of year to try this, with Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, but I think I will forge ahead anyway.

 

[ianf0ster]

I feel stuck too.
I was diagnosed T2 about a year and a half ago. I went on Metformin and started eating a LCHF diet. First A1C after being on that a few months was great! I lost about 20-25 pounds. Doctor was happy. I was happy.
About 6 more months went by and I went in for blood work and while my A1C was still great, like my weight, my LDL cholesterol was horrible. Doctor recommended quitting LCHF and trying the DASH diet. Also prescribed a statin.
Now, 18 months after diagnosis, I have gained 10 pounds back, LDL number isn't great, A1C was OK but not as good at it had been on the LCHF diet. I got discouraged and started indulging in too many bad foods -- mostly pastries -- too many carbs and too much sugar. Not bingeing, just "treating myself" on occasion.
Just this morning I decided that the way forward, for me, may be to try LCHF again. I am more worried about LDL than A1C now, but being overweight isn't any more heart-healthy than bad LDL numbers are, and I may try risking a higher LDL in hopeful exchange for a lower A1C and weight.
This isn't a good time of year to try this, with Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, but I think I will forge ahead anyway.

Hi SaskiaKC,
Did you know to expect the LDL to increase while still in 'weight Loss mode' on LCHF?
It was just to avoid a confrontation with my GP that I did the (short term hurtful) Dave Feldman Protocol to reduce (artificially) my LDL for my Blood Lipid test. So my ratios were actually much worse, but my GP is still in the stone-age and so just ignored the raised Triglycerides (caused by chugging Olive Oil).

Health Care Professionals actively working against you is the norm for us T2D's - so it pays to be both better informed than them and to plan one step ahead of them!

I'm confident that when I have my next Lipid Profile blood work, my LDL will be lower than when I started on LCHF due to having purged all that visceral body fat and normalised my HbA1c.

 

[bulkbiker]

I am more worried about LDL than A1C now, but being overweight isn't any more heart-healthy than bad LDL numbers are, and I may try risking a higher LDL in hopeful exchange for a lower A1C and weight.

Why are you worried about LDL it isn't even included as a risk factor in CVD risk calculators?

 

[Mrsmac247]

Thank you, it always seems harder on the second, third, forth go around probably because of the knowledge that it can be done and I let it slip. Carb creep is definitely a problem for me, I can have an occasional treat if I factor it in like after sunday dinner but I have always been an emotional eater so that 1 treat turns into a week and then I say next week I'll do better. I definately know (from my meter) that my body can handle some carbs but cannot do with the carbs at every meal and the majority of the time I need to be low carb.

Perhaps I need to fix my focus because I cannot go back and change the past but can try to be more mindful about how I proceed going forward, I just want to be able to stick to it!

Indeed Saskia, and in the same breath, when is the right time but now? I have my daughters 21st and another 9th coming up as well as my mothers 80th then Christmas followed by a 10 year anniversary! there will always be something. Thats given me something to think about!

 

[SaskiaKC]

Why are you worried about LDL it isn't even included as a risk factor in CVD risk calculators?

It is a major risk factor. In fact you are the only person I know of who doesn't seem to be aware of that.

 

[bulkbiker]

It is a major risk factor. In fact you are the only person I know of who doesn't seem to be aware of that.

Plenty disagree, not only me..

https://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/cholesterol-and-statins.156985/

 

[SaskiaKC]

Hi SaskiaKC,
Did you know to expect the LDL to increase while still in 'weight Loss mode' on LCHF?
.

No, I had no idea. I was happily eating LCHF thinking I was doing a good thing because my weight was coming down and my A1C went down. I was shocked when I went back to the doctor and found that my LDL was so high.
I am always concerned when I read about other T2s feasting on bacon and eggs and bacon and sausages and cheese and more bacon and eggs. They check their FBGs religiously but you can't prick you finger to check your LDL levels so I wonder where those numbers are.

 

[SaskiaKC]

Plenty disagree, not only me..

https://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/threads/cholesterol-and-statins.156985/

Well, I disagree with you but I am not going to argue with you here. You tried arguing with me on another thread and I left that one. I am not going to leave this one. This is @Mrsmac247 's thread, not your soapbox. If all you want to do is attack me, go away.

 

[SaskiaKC]

Thank you, it always seems harder on the second, third, forth go around probably because of the knowledge that it can be done and I let it slip. Carb creep is definitely a problem for me, I can have an occasional treat if I factor it in like after sunday dinner but I have always been an emotional eater so that 1 treat turns into a week and then I say next week I'll do better. I definately know (from my meter) that my body can handle some carbs but cannot do with the carbs at every meal and the majority of the time I need to be low carb.

Perhaps I need to fix my focus because I cannot go back and change the past but can try to be more mindful about how I proceed going forward, I just want to be able to stick to it!

Indeed Saskia, and in the same breath, when is the right time but now? I have my daughters 21st and another 9th coming up as well as my mothers 80th then Christmas followed by a 10 year anniversary! there will always be something. Thats given me something to think about!

You remind me of me. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. Like you, I can tell myself "One treat because it's the weekend," but my body is like a cat on treats -- it thinks that one treat on the weekend should be followed by one more treat on each weekday.

One problem I'm having right now is that all the LCHF foods I ate last year have lost all appeal for me. Sometimes the thought of eating them makes me almost gag. Then there's my digestive system -- a real workhorse that rarely gives trouble, unless I try to eat really well, as I did last Sunday, some very good meatballs, and later a very good salad with chicken -- followed by a Monday of not being able to go out (or very far from the bathroom!).

Hug.

 

[bulkbiker]

I was happily eating LCHF thinking I was doing a good thing because my weight was coming down and my A1C went down

Sounds like a very good thing to me..

 

[Mrsmac247]

And that is it @SaskiaKC I lost interest in the foods. Its not that they were not enjoyable, they were but I struggled a bit eating more fat than my low fat diets used to tell me. I still cut fat off meat and eat skinless chicken etc so I think at times I may not have been getting the full benefits of the way of eating. I feel quite uninspired by the thought of meat and veg and am also a creature of habit so repeat meals. With 3 children and a hubby, there are so many palettes to cook for and I've been ok at not touching the rice and potatoes etc, I think I just became disillusioned when thinking of restarting by all the ways which have now become popular such as keto and IF.

My mind is telling me that maybe just going back to basics with LCHF and some IF will be the way. I have always had a problem with constant snacking and IF has been helping with that, as for all the other prescriptive named diets, I think I need to stay clear at least until I draw up a consistent menu that works!

 

[Concordjan]

So sorry for your losses. A lot to have to deal with, not really surprising that you ‘fell off the wagon’. Also more difficult staying low carb when you are cooking for others who don’t follow this way of eating.
You must start putting your health first. Good luck.

 

[bulkbiker]

My mind is telling me that maybe just going back to basics with LCHF and some IF will be the way.

Certainly what seems to work best for most. Any chance you could persuade the family to join you for a month.
See if their health improves too and it becomes more habitual for all?

 

[Mrsmac247]

@bulkbiker my longsuffering husband bless him is low carb and what I noticed is that he tries to stay consistent almost waiting for me to rejoin him! My kids are another matter lol I think I have just become obsessed with food so to speak, in the last 4 weeks, I've started IF and partial carnivore (only because I got bored with the veg) but again seem to be looking for the next fix. I watched an inspirational youtuber who isnt T2 but she designed her own diet combining elements of others and lost a lot of weight. I have started writting my own in the hope that I can incorporate some of the things that I love on an occasional basis so that I dont feel I am missing out but also thinking ahead on what I will do in an emotional crisis so to speak. Maybe if I am more prepared, I can make it work

 

[SaskiaKC]

And that is it @SaskiaKC I lost interest in the foods. Its not that they were not enjoyable, they were but I struggled a bit eating more fat than my low fat diets used to tell me. I still cut fat off meat and eat skinless chicken etc so I think at times I may not have been getting the full benefits of the way of eating. I feel quite uninspired by the thought of meat and veg and am also a creature of habit so repeat meals. With 3 children and a hubby, there are so many palettes to cook for and I've been ok at not touching the rice and potatoes etc, I think I just became disillusioned when thinking of restarting by all the ways which have now become popular such as keto and IF.

My mind is telling me that maybe just going back to basics with LCHF and some IF will be the way. I have always had a problem with constant snacking and IF has been helping with that, as for all the other prescriptive named diets, I think I need to stay clear at least until I draw up a consistent menu that works!

My mother was a nutritionist. True, she got her degree in 1937, but she taught me about the importance of a balanced diet. I keep trying to go back to that -- eating a good mix of healthful meats, poultry, fish, with vegetables and small portions of starches.
I think that if I try the LCHF between now and my next doctor's appointment, in January, I will see what my A1C and LDL and weight numbers are then, and after that I will try the balanced "normal" way of eating I was raised on, as a maintenance diet.

I am so sorry about the losses of your relatives and friends.

 

[ianf0ster]

It is a major risk factor. In fact you are the only person I know of who doesn't seem to be aware of that.

@SaskiaKC,
Are you absolutely sure about that? I am not completely up to date on the research but I know these things:
1. Over 30% of people can lower LDL in only 3 days ( Dave Feldman Protocol) - so how can it be long term predictor of an illness?
2. Was not Total LDL ditched as an indicator over 10yrs ago? Apart from stone-age doctors like at my local GP surgery. How can the repair mechanism for inflammation in the blood vessels be the cause of CVD - it doesn't make sense to me. Its a bit like saying that because police are often seen at the scene of a crime, reducing police numbers will reduce crime. - But perhaps you are more knowledgeable than me.
3. Don't the current medical schools teach that the ratio of HDL to Triglycerides is the most important lipid-related indicator of CVD risk? The best one is an increasing Calcium Score, of course.
4. How can all the un-damaged 'fluffy' LDL get stuck in those small lesions in the blood vessels? - Surely it is only the damaged (oxodised) small particle LDL that can get in there.

Of course Statin manufacturers don't want you to know any of that since statins don't have any effect on the damaged LDL (only the good stuff). And neither do they want T2 diabetics to know that Statins increase your BG levels (make your diabetes worse).
Since you are a woman, you probably know that it has been estimated that statins are a waste of resource for women - estimated that although some male lives have been saved by statins ( less than 18% of those who died on statins), absolutely 0 women have been saved.

If you are over 65 ( as I am) then you must have seen that the studies all show that the older people in the highest quadrant of LDL readings (who might be expected to die of heart disease) actually have a statistically significant lower all-cause mortality rate (= live longer) than those in the lowest quartile i.e the section that your GP would like to get you into!

 

[ianf0ster]

My mind is telling me that maybe just going back to basics with LCHF and some IF will be the way. I have always had a problem with constant snacking and IF has been helping with that, as for all the other prescriptive named diets, I think I need to stay clear at least until I draw up a consistent menu that works!

It is not a diet that you need - it is a lifestyle!

 

[ianf0ster]

I think that if I try the LCHF between now and my next doctor's appointment, in January, I will see what my A1C and LDL and weight numbers are then, and after that I will try the balanced "normal" way of eating I was raised on, as a maintenance diet.

If you actually go it (eating LCHF to your meter) then your HbA1c and weight will both be lower, however your LDL will certainly be higher. since you will be freeing up LDL stored in visceral fat, until you get to , eight maintenance mode.

I note that Dr David Unwin (@lowcarbgp on Twitter) now has a 50% remission rate (on Low Carb) for his Type 2 patients. His surgery has the best figures for T2 treatment in the whole of the UK (by official NHS figures).