Thank you for your kind response, Jojo. I am glad you have had the chance of a good life with children to bless this world. I've chose not to have children because I do not wish for them to inherit my curse. But perhaps, that's also because I don't think I'll be able to find a partner with how quiet I am and my inability to provide due to unemployment.
Of all the tributes flooding in for Robin Williams, this is the one I feel should be shared here today. By Jason Manford via his Facebook Fanpage
"If you feel alone and down, anxious and low. If you feel deep sadness but can't find a root cause. If people tell you to 'snap out of it' or 'things can only get better' or 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger', know that it's simply not always true. Sometimes it does kill you.
Please seek help. No one will think you're being melodramatic, I swear. No one will think you're silly or wasting people's time. No one will say 'what? But you're always so happy, maybe you're just having a bad day'. For some people, every day is a bad day and they get through it, but sometimes they stop getting through it.
If depression can (allegedly) kill Robin Williams, one of the world's greatest funny men, well it can get any of us at any time. If the Genie from Aladdin can suffer and the DJ in Good Morning Vietnam can be affected by it, then so can you, or your child or friend or work colleague.
I always remind myself of the quote from Watchmen:
"Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life is harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go see him. That should pick you up." Man bursts into tears. Says, "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
Please. Ask for help. If you have no one or if you don't want to to tell them yet, then ring Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 for someone to talk to, or talk to your GP.
The world needs you even if you don't think it does. I promise, we need you here, now."