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Don't involve yourself in the blame game.

  • Thread starter Thread starter catherinecherub
  • Start Date Start Date
Anyone who wants to have long term good health should eat real food and avoid factory processed food, even if they can tolerate refined carbs.
BTW- I shared the link you have in your profile (dietdoctor.com) with my son because it is a very simple and easy to understand (not that he is an idiot, but he really isn't very interested or patient with the more involved stuff i give him on diet info) and he actually read it!!!!!!!! And agreed to try the paleo/LC or VLCHF diet. He needs to lose about 40 lbs and get better control of his BS. I am hoping to get him off metformin and glipizide, if he does change the way he eats ( and of course he needs to exercise more). So ... thanks for putting it in there- hopefully it will guide him to better health!
 
I hope it works out for him. If he sticks to it he will see results. Just a warning about the gliclazide - going low carb while on it can result in hypoglycemia. I highly recommend that he coordinates with his doctor on the change in diet.
 
I hope it works out for him. If he sticks to it he will see results. Just a warning about the gliclazide - going low carb while on it can result in hypoglycemia. I highly recommend that he coordinates with his doctor on the change in diet.
Yes, thanks for the tip- he has an appt next week so hopefully he will discuss it with him (I say hopefully because at 26 he is pretty noncompliant so far with behavior modification.Very frustrating ) I do know to that you really have to stick with it strictly ( if you sneak in the carbs- it totally fails to produce the results re: BS control). I do know that I have been sticking to it for a month and I definitely have more energy. That must mean something good is happening!
 

I must thank you catherinecherub and this forum full of people who question and share.

My mother was diagnosed with Type 2 in January this year, after many years of ill health and disability, and I was/am quite frustrated with her as she hasn't modified her diet/behaviour in my eyes at all, only giving up wheat for lent. I realise after reading your post and links that I have subscribed to this 'it's the individuals 'fault' for Type2', I think or rather now I know I have unrationally blamed her for her ill health over the years even though I know the reality.

So when my doc told me in June that I may as well assume I have Type2 as my HBwhatever was borderline and my family history was so Type 2 heavy ; mother, her sister, her father, my fathers mother had it, it goes on. Since that eventful day in June, my drive for taming the diabetes beast has been that I didn't want for my son the 'burden' of my choices that have led to this... I hope that makes sense. I still have the drive for taming of the beast, just not from a place of self blame.

Once I read the OP, I have been in mild shock and I realise I need to give my mother a sincere apology. She is not like me whereby I will question the Doc's, she takes what they say or prescribe with minimal questions but that doesn't make her culpable.

On a good note, since reading in another post about inflammation, diabetes and carbs, I have shared this info with my mother regarding her crippling inflammed joint problems that are not RA. It makes sense, although her response was to take this to the Orthopedic Consultant next month.... I bit my lip to stop myself saying "good luck with that".

The reach of this forum has even had a positive affect on my relationship with my mother.... it knows no bounds. All who agree say, aye.
 
Wow- I am really impressed by your doctor's approach. Well said. I think the problem comes in because for some people who are overweight (not more than many, many people walking around without diabetes!) a cornerstone of treatment is to lose weight and exercise because is it often has significant benefit for those with diabetes. It isn't about blame, but using the tools in one's tool box to manage a disease. Like telling people with high blood pressure to reduce salt intake- they don't use more than other people, but have a sensitivity internally and they need to reduce what they use due to its effects on hypertension. Not blame but relationship to treatment. Unfortunately this part about "it's not your fault" gets left out!!
 
Obesity is ya know, obviously linked to T2 DM and it is one of the more effective means to manage the disease, but insulin resistance is considered to be rather genetic, and makes losing weight more difficult (and also may likely have contributed to weight gain in the 1st place!) I think it would be best to take responsibility instead of taking blame. Responsibility not in the "whys" but in the management part of it. All diabetics, whether thin or overweight do have to manage their dietary intake of carbs and also strongly benefit from BS control with exercise. Both these things are tough to do for anyone (unless you LOVE to exercise and hate desserts or pasta!) regardless of weight. I am Type 2 and have never been overweight- so no one is blaming me... but guess what?! I have the same disease- so I guess it isn't as simple as being obese. We all need to be kind to ourselves and drop the self-blame (regardless of how other people treat us)- that is the only way we can love ourselves enough to do the hard work of managing this thing! I know... easier said than done!
 
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You make a very good point about stress. Physiological and emotional stress affect blood glucose levels. While there are many complex metabolic/biochemical reasons for this, it is a known fact. In the ICU, we have everyone (even those not diabetic- on insulin drip/hourly testing and titration) because of this. Interestingly, as a T2, I pretty much know what I have to do to stay in control - but the highest my BS ever was, was the day my daughter had surgery-very stressful- I had not ingested one morsel of food- yet my BS was over 300! One thing exercise does is help manage cortisol levels and the stress response we have (neurotransmitters too). It also lowers insulin resistance. I really hate to exercise frankly, but I have good results when I do.
 
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Well said! When my son was diagnosed with DM T2, I was there and this was exactly what she told him, which also helps ease the burden of self-blame. She did say with meds, weight loss and exercise he could reverse the diabetes, but nothing will reverse the genetic factors leading up to the diagnosis (in his case metabolic syndrome).
 
Well I am not sure I agree with your thoughts about remaining dumb and ignorant, but I can say I firmly believe that very low carb/high fat diets are perhaps the best "medicine". The trouble is most doctors or diabetic specialists don't prescribe this diet, and many people are in the mindset of being powerless ( with regard to medical concerns) and the medical team has the "power"- and you don't question that, particularly older folks. I would like the medical community to get behind the data on VLCD's and accept it as a dietary regimen they actually prescribe.
 
My son had a BMI of 33- He just never lost weight - even when he had facial surgery and couldn't eat solids for 2 months (He had between 500-1000 cal daily- I made in blender- high quality soups etc- not low carb though.) He only lost 10 lbs. Last month , he started the VLCD, and has lost 15 lbs in less than a month. He feels great, his blood sugar levels much improved, and he doesn't feel starving all the time. I don't care what any doctor says- I think this is the way to go if you are T2.
 
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My parents blame me alot for becoming diabetics...they keep saying that I should have known better since my parents themselves are diabetics.... I should have control my diet....wish I could turn back in time...

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Ya, and you could wish you had different parents (genetically speaking, that is!) but you can't - so figure out a way to calmly and lovingly tell them and yourself that blame is NEVER useful, helpful or healthy. Life isn't a court of law where establishing blame is important. It is more about a series of choices we make, in relation to all the things we have and don't have control of. What does the serenity prayer say (not just for AA) ? And the wisdom to know the difference...so the healthiest choice is to do whatever you can, right now, to take care of yourself. We all are doing the best we can at the time we are doing it, and we can choose to do, learn, and to be a part of things that enable us to make better choices. Choose not to internalize blame.
 
Wow- great information shared by both of you! And it seems, in a cruel twist of fate, the more impaired your ability is to metabolize carbs seems to be directly proportional to how much you crave them! (My life anyway
 
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I think we have to put blame for the diabetes epidemic, on American politicians who were quick to rush in with dietary guidelines to cut fat, so that they could give Americans cheap food and also export it. The UK government just followed along.

Having made one colossal mistake which millions of people have died and suffered from, they have steamed straight ahead with genetic modification. Another potential timebomb.

Food manufacturers and supermarkets are guilty of putting profit before health and offloading a lot of cheap rubbish on us.

It's a scandal when additive free food, not contaminated with GMOs and added water is so expensive. Your health shouldn't depend on your bank balance. It often means that young families and pensioners who need the most nutritious food get the worst diet.

I also blame successive governments for not providing cookery classes for kids of both genders which actually teach them to cook proper food. Jamie Oliver has done some sterling work but the government, all governments need to turn back the tide of the SAD because it is sad and makes people sick.
 
Excellent points here. I totally agree with you that the dietary guidelines established are simply garbage- but boy, were they successful in making Big Pharma rich!!! Ya, too bad for us that we are suffering, dying etc, etc... We should be able to trust information given to us- and instead- it is causing epidemic levels of disease. I can't imagine what the fallout for GMO's will be. I was spending a ridiculous amount of money buying organic produce, meats, and other food products and I just can no longer afford it- it is prohibitive!
 
I know that some Type 2's have a hard time because they think that because they are overweight that they brought this on themselves.

I am T2.
I am overweight
I have a sweet tooth

I blame my parents.

No seriously, with both parent being type 2 according to this site I am 75% more at risk of having diabetes.

http://www.diabetes.co.uk/diabetes-and-genetics.html

Because I it worried me I would regularly pester my doctor for a blood test.

I was diagnosed 2 years ago and I cried when the doctor told me. I expected it at some time just not now. My parents were in their 50's when they were diagnosed, but looking back and knowing what I know now, I think they had the condition long before that.

Don't get me wrong, I could have done things differently, couldn't we all in hindsight.

But since that diagnosis, I lost 21lbs (iv'e put a little bit back on but I'm nowhere near what I was)
I go to the gym
This year I signed up for my 1st 5k. I didn't manage to run all the way, (and still can't), but did it in a steady 43 mins and hope to beat that when I do it again next year.

For me in a way it was a kick up the backside to start looking after myself.


This is where I blame myself
I still eat sweets, cake and biscuits. (I have a sweet tooth and not much will power)
I still eat carbs (the wrong kind)
I forget to take my tablets.

My last check up my bg had gone from 6.2 to 7.2 (what a difference a year makes)

So, I am back on the (reasonably health eating), ordered a blood glucose monitor and hopefully get it back down. Back to the nurse in December rather than next year so fingers crossed,
 
Hi all,
I have had t2 for about 7 years now, and if I'm honest i did not take it that seriously as i felt fine, mine was not that i was over weight but i was going through a lot of stress at work, for something that should have never been taken seriouslyin the first place.
As it turned out i was right all along it was a joke but large companys say they have to do this.
Anyway while all this was going on not really knowing the out come. My stress levels were going high as a kite.
I thought i was going mad, so went to see my doctor and done a few test and hay hoo told i have t2 Diabetes.
So up too a few mths ago I had the best Diabetes nurse in our surgery. But all that ended as she moved on ,so now have a new lady who i have never meet, and the nurse i did see i thought i knew more then her, so for me a total waste of time.
What i find refreashing reading through what others have said is hopeful for me, and i feel no longer on my own.
So thank you to everyone.
 
I think the important psychological shift should be from self-blame to self awareness. Self-blame is punitive and engenders shame, which will never help you love and believe in yourself enough to make tough behavioral steps - like changing your dietary choices and level of exercise. If it was so easy, obesity wouldn't be such a problem, so be kind to yourself! You are not alone. Take one step at a time, and while you may not be able to control some aspects of metabolic disease, you can help your health and blood sugar control by committing to lifestyle changes your doctor recommends that can make a difference in your overall wellbeing. best wishes
 
Well said- I can't agree more with your statement about that it is YOUR health and not a game for others to play- yes, it takes many forms of support, but ultimately we will live with the outcome- so best to take the time to educate, self-advocate and see what works the best for you.
 

Thank you for this! For the time being I feel it is so hopeless. I'm always feeling a little down in the winter. This year I've tried to beat that by resting more (according to what I thought was good for me). I have struggled to keep the blood sugar right in the winter months. It has varied a lot during the day. Some days it has been near 12 . Resting has helped to keep the "winter mood" OK, but it seem to have made the diabetes grow worse. Yes, I'll fight, ...
 
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