You can't educate your child - at 13 they WILL NOT LISTEN. Particularly not to parents & if they are adamant that they are in denial, neither will they listen to hospital staff until they are seriously ill.
My son rebelled seriously at 13 ( 8 hospital admissions in 2 years) & nearly all of them, I made matters worse by trying to control his diet & insulin as recomended by the medical team at the time. READ the NICE guidelines on Teanage diabetes
http://www.nice.org.uk/nicemedia/live/1 ... /29392.pdf - there NOTHING about parents of teens controlling them or even supporting them with diet etc. All it says is build self esteme & educate them so that they have enough self confidence to
take control of their own doses & diet.
This is what we are now doing & after 2 years of hell trying to follow hospital advice to control him, we gave up, backed off massively, stopped checking meter readings & praised him for every good moment we saw ( very few for the first month or so - but now aged 16 nearly continually perfect
)
You DO as a parent have to try to hide how worried you are about getting it wrong as that is why he will be hiding the being sick & over eating. Any signs that you are trying to take away independance will just cause rebellion just because you are a parent and signs that you might tell him off will make him hide it more.
If you are worried about DKA, Check ketone levels from the urine on the floor in the bathroom or toilet side - boys who are there every 30 minutes are bound to splash some ( sneeky but less visible to them as checking up on them, & just as accurate if taken within an hour or two I have found). It takes ketones off the scale to give DKA & with my son at least 5-6 hours of vomiting before he becomes
seriously ill. Telling his mates how seriously ill he was after DKA, really worked well, as peer pressure to stay healthy is far more effective than parents or hospital pressure & makes them realise they have friends who care for them too despite the diabetes ( good for self esteem). It is only when they realise HOW ILL they became, that they will try to stop it happening again.
Not letting him know you are worried will remove many arguements, but hard to do - you will have to pretend not to be worried at what are clearly high BMs, & leave him to deal with it himself - it reazlly is the best way to learn. Do not order teanagers about "don't eat that/DO your insulin NOW" Try phrases like " you haven't forgotten your insulin have you?" which gives them the last say in there actions - leaving a window of oportunity for him to adjust it without admitting a mistake. Excessive drinking & ketones - only worry if they don't start falling within 12 hours. If they are very high +++, offer loads of drinks & sympathy about possible underlying infection - NO ACCUSATIONS that they might have made a mistake. If the ketones start falling, your tean will be ok at home and you don't need a hospital admission, which can lead to even more problems & feelings of "WHY ME / I'm different", & boost their self esteme that "They are in control of their own body and CAN solve the problem without help" ( Essential feeling for independant 13-14-15 year olds). But if they DO have high ketones, hang around in case you are needed. Invent another excuse why you need to stay at home with them ( don't tell them you are worried - something like waiting in for a delvery makes them feel less concerned about telling you the truth if they get really ill).
THEY CAN GET VERY VERY ILL - if you are sure they are getting WORSE and they don't want to go to hospital, call a GP home visit & get a Dr to persuade them this time they have taken it too far.
(CAlling an ambulance, who will call the police to admit them in handcuffs DOES NOT WORK as it makes hospital even more threatening next time).
Good luck - My sympathy goes out to you - I had the same for over 2 years - from 13 to 15, but by 16 he is finally taking a more sensible attitude and not ALL of his life is a fight against diabetes and authority. Think how he feels about your actions in EVERYTHING you do & he will grow in confidence & take on more responsibility. Bad days will still happen, but it will not be "What did you do wrong" rather "how do we get out of this mess as calmly as possible" He will appreciate you for it far more than if you just attempt to control his life and fail. Failing on this one may mean far worse & he gets reallly ill & is too scared to ask for help from anyone...
Crushersmum