My boyfriend with Type 1 diabetes

[Stacey_Brook]

I’ve just joined this site, there’s so much information on here which is helpful already.

My boyfriend has type 1 diabetes, he has had it since he was 12 years old.
I want to support him the best I can but whenever I’m concerned about him, he respsonds quite abruptly. I understand that it’s something he has had for a long time but sometimes I feel like he isn’t helping himself...

My main concern is that he has lost his glucose testing kit, it’s been nearly a year since he’s had it... I want to buy one for him but need to know the best device to buy?

I’m also concerned that he has a pain in his stomach every so often that makes him feel sick, he had it more frequently a few months ago to the point he was throwing up and I wanted to call an ambulance because he didn’t have his glucose test, he just told me he would leave if I called them so I spent the whole night monitoring him while he slept. He’s also been very irritable, and his mood changes very quickly. I’m not sure if this is to do with his diabetes, I know he gets very down when we start talking about it but he refuses to seek any help.

I also feel like I wouldn’t know what to do in an emergency if something did happen to him, if anyone can give me advice on this that would be brilliant. I know that rubbing sugar in the gums is meant to help.

I just want him to feel safer in my presence, and I don’t want to feel on edge when I’m with him. I don’t want to sound selfish, I know it must be incredibly hard but that’s why I want to support him as much as I can.

Any advice with help massively!

 

[Jaylee]

Hi @Stacey_Brook ,

Welcome to the forum.

Sounds like your fella does need to help himself..

How long is it since your boyfriend has seen his health care professionals?
Being a T1, he would get issued with a blood test meter by his HCPs & get test strips on repeat prescription along with his other diabetic meds..
Even companies like Roche will give meters for gratis to type ones if you contact them & ask..?

Going to tag in a few guys with the experience to help @therower ,@Juicyj @novorapidboi26 @catapillar

A year is a long time to go without a meter.

Wishing you both luck!

 

[Snapsy]

@Stacey_Brook I'm sending a hug your way. It sounds as if your boyfriend is in need of intervention and support from his doctor. As you - and he - know, regular testing in essential if he is to be in a position to control his diabetes and prevent complications.

As a type 1 he can be provided with a replacement meter for free, and will get testing strips for free on prescription.

Please encourage him to seek advice from a doctor. He doesn't sound well.

(A potential complication of uncontrolled diabetes is erectile dysfunction. As a young man, might telling him that sway him?)

You're doing the right thing coming on here. Why not get him to have a look, too?

Love Snapsy xxx

 

[Gabrielle_Tai]

Hi Hi @Stacey_Brook , i cannot give much advice since i just diagnosis like two months ago and still learning about it. But from what i can learn from my GP, type 1( i think type 2 also) cannot be taken lightly because you can end up with a of diabetes complication. Just advice him that he need to take care of himself and seek help if needed, on what kind of glucose monitoring device to get i do heard a lot of people here recommend Freestyle libre.I not sure how good it is but i heard a lot of positive but myself ( more like my parents) decided to go with Dexcom G5 since the cost is cheaper in a long run ( i heard the sensor can be used up to 2 weeks if you keep reset it).

 

[catapillar]

I've gotta be honest @Stacey_Brook your post does read a little weird. Where are you based, which country? Type 1s don't have to buy blood glucose monitor in the uk, the monitors and the strips to test with are free on the NHS and most manufacturers will provide the monitors free to a type 1 because they know they will make the money back on the prescribed strips.

Are you sure your boyfriend is being honest about having type 1? If he doesn't have a blood glucose monitor presumably you've never seen him test his blood sugar. Have you ever seen him inject insulin?

Rubbing sugar into the gums in an emergency might not in reality be that great of an idea unless you are particularly keen to choke him. If a diabetic is unconcious and unable to eat then step 1 of first aid is call an ambulance; 2) test blood sugar, if no test kit available proceed straight to 3; 3) if blood sugar under 4 administer fast acting carb that can be bucally absorbed without choking (eg honey, jam); 4) if blood sugar over 20/30 don't administer sugar.

 

[Daibell]

Hi. Yes, the NHS will provide a meter for free but most manufacturers including Roche as someone else has said will provide one free if asked. Your boyfriend must see the GP/DN for a diabetes review but you know that. It sounds like he has some depression?

 

[paulus1]

sounds like your boy friend has a death wish. if he is not testing. if not testing i doubt he is jabbing his insulin. so how his he alive. threatening to leave you if you call an ambulance is controlling. as others say this smells of a lie. if he cant be bothered to care for himself and refuses help and support. i would get out of the relationship. unless your keen on funerals or want to push a blind legless chronically sick man around for the remainder of his short life. if it turns out he his not a diabetic he is one sick puppy.

 

[Bluey1]

Hi Stacey,
I don't know which country you live in or how old your BF is. It sounds like he has a delayed or continued teenage rebellion. I don't know if you have any contact with his parents. I think anything you do related to D will not be received in the spirit it is given. A blood test kit will be useless, if he hasn't used one in the last year, I doubt he will now. If you have a connection with his parents do a gift swap, get him a Libre sensor and scanner, but get his parents to give it to him and you give him what they were going to give him.
I know you only mean the best and have his well being as your driver. I know I get cranky when people tell me how to manage my D, however I'm much better behaved.
In Australia I have to get a Drs certificate to renew my license, supposedly every year, but they only ask every 2 years. What a shame it's not where you are as that would encourage him (assuming he has a car licence).

 

[novorapidboi26]

Hi Stacey,

I really do feel for you as trying to support a type one who doesn't support themselves is very hard and frustrating.....

As previously mentioned, meters can be acquired free and usually from the diabetes clinic.....I would recommend the clinic as this will provide an opportunity for him to sit down and have a chat about all the resources available to him that will make life easier for him, from educational courses that will get him back in to the testing routine, to new technology to help with the day to day nuisance of diabetes....

Does he attend clinic regularly?

Do you know what insulin he is on?

As mentioned earlier, he really needs to do all the hard work himself to make a difference.....what you can do is help him attend the clinic appointments and make sure he has his medication......its a balancing act with the nagging though.....looking back I actually appreciated the nagging over the years in my twenties......so as long as you can nag him in the nicest way and you can both just move on, thats the most important thing....

Finally, it would be a good idea for him to explore forums like this....as he can casually chat anonymously to other diabetics, even if its just to gain some confidence and support....

 

[wiflib]

This is what I’d do but then I’m a stroppy old woman.

The next time he is nasty or makes you feel scared or anxious or threatens to leave, look at him square in the face and tell him his behaviour is unacceptable. You are both in this relationship, don’t be his parent or carer, you are his parter, his lover and you expect him to behave like one. Tough love.

 

[Antje77]

Being a type1, not knowing what your blood sugar is and throwing up is alarming. Well done you kept an eye on him. It could very well be keto-acidosis. If it was, he seems to have gotten away with it this time, next time he could be less lucky. Should it happen again, you're right in calling an ambulance.
I wish you all the best with your stubborn boyfriend, and I hope he'll start to try to manage his condition. All the best for the boyfriend as well!