Newbie in denial needs help...

[c4bubbles]

Hello,
I'm 34 years old and was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes in February of this year. I was diagnosed with very high blood pressure about 4 years ago and currently take 80mg Valsartan once a day. My blood pressure results have always remained normal whilst on the medication. I am also very overweight (BMI - 39.3).
I am ashamed to say that I have been in complete denial these past few months. I am by nature, a very positive, upbeat person but focusing on the diabetes is making me very blue and incredibly tearful. I have read so much conflicting information. On diagnosis, my Doctor told me that had my results been half a point lower, she would be telling me that I was pre-diabetic. I have not had the courage to make an appointment for HbA1c test (preferring to stick my head in the sand and pretend that this isn't happening to me ).
I have tried testing myself using the sticks that you urinate on and these have never changed colour and I have purchased and used a home testing kit from boots (where you prick your finger and have a colour wheel for comparison) and the results have come back as just over normal.
My cholesterol is normal (or was the last time I was tested). When I was diagnosed with high blood pressure, it was noted that my walls of my heart were very slightly thickened (verging on abnormal but my Doctor didn't seem too worried about it).
I am very sedentary but have managed to lose a stone in weight very, very slowly. I was advised that diet and exercise are the way forward as as form of treatment. I was given no paperwork or leaflets and was advised to "look on the internet" for information. I haven't been offered one to one or group support/councelling.
My thoughts are consumed with heart disease and I'm beyond terrified that a heart attack is imminent. This above all, is my biggest fear. I've been suffering from heart palpitations and short, dull aches on the left hand side of my chest for a long time (never excruciatingly painful, but I'm aware of the sensation which is a regular occurence). I've told the Doctor about it before but he seems to think it's muscular pain and not heart related but my instinct tells me otherwise. He has even given me an ecg which came back as normal but something just doesn't feel right. I take aspirin regularly as I feel that the positives outway the risks. I don't want to seem like a hypochondriac and so keep what I'm feeling to myself and scare myself stupid with self diagnosis via google!!!
I don't smoke, rarely, rarely consume alcohol or soft drinks and I LOVE food. I make cupcakes for a living which obviously doesn't help either!
My father had diabetes and died in 2001 (from a non related illness I believe) and I'm pretty sure that diabetes runs in the family. I feel very alone, confused and completely overwhelmed. I have been on a diet of one kind or another for most of my adult life and no matter how dig I deep, I cannot find the willpower to make substantial weightloss a long term success. I am profoundly aware that being this size is literally killing me and I cannot understand my lack of self control when logic dictates that weightloss is no longer just a good idea but an absolute necessity and still I fail...
Your advice and support would be very much appreciated. Apologies for such a long post (this has building up inside me for 8 months).
Cindy x

Does ayone have any opinions on coconut oil? I've been doing some research and it's been very interesting. I'd like to try adding it to my diet but can't make up my mind whether or not it's a good idea!

 

[cugila]

Hi Cindy.
Welcome to the forum. Denial is a very easy thing to do. We have probably all done the same but you need to realise that Diabetes is controllable and your health will improve providing you take the appropriate steps NOW and give yourself a fighting chance.

You tell us you have tested your Bg levels ? When have you tested ? I could test my Bg levels at 7am every day and they would tell me that my levels were great. During the day the levels will rise and fall and may be anything but great, they could be horrendous.

Have you tested on waking, before meals, then 1 and 2 hrs after meals ? Testing with a meter is the only way you are going to know what is actually happening to your Bg levels especially after foods. Get the numbers.

Get the HbA1c test done to see what your average levels were over the last 90 days. Avoiding it is doing you no favours at all. That is at least somewhere to start and take corrective action.

YOU have to take control of this and be pro-active in your own treatment and care. If you don't get offered something then go back and ASK for it. Doing nothing is not an option. You have come to the right place for support and guidance. That's what this site is good at.

YOU need to be determined and resolute in your desire to get this condition under control by using your own willpower and motivation. You were motivated enough to come here so that is a good start.

I think you know that you must lose weight. Losing weight will help your Diabetes and reduce your Bg levels. It will have all sorts of benefits in other areas to. Advice from people on here will help you get a strategy to do that. YOU have to stick to it and forget what foods you love....do you love life ? That is more important than anything else. Letting Diabetes beat you will just lead to more complications and reduced life expectancy.

This is the wake up call Cindy. Don't oversleep ! :wink:

 

[Reetpetite]

Hi Cindy

Welcome to the Forum - you have come to the right place for help and support. I am still a relative newbie to diabetes (diagnosed in May this year) so am not an expert but by following the advice of the people on this forum I have managed to get control of my bg and lose over 2 stone in the process - and I assure you if I can do it so can you. I have nil willpower but I realised very quickly that it was me that was going to have to take control or suffer the terrible consequences that could happen down the line and as I value my eyesight and feet it gave me the 'kick up the backside' that I needed to take control. I'm not saying it's easy because there are still days I struggle and feel down but I give myself a good talking to and start again.

This is what I did on being diagnosed:

Firstly, I bought a test meter and tested when I woke up (fasting) and then before a meal, and then one and two hours after a meal and on going to bed. I also kept a food diary for the first two months of testing so I could see what food raised my bg levels - it became very obvious that things like bread, pasta, potato and rice all raised my levels. So I cut these out and starting low-carbing - within a week or two my bg numbers reduced and I try to keep them below 7 mmol/l. They are usually in the 5's and 6's now and I would like to get them a little lower. When I was diagnosed I was 12.5 and my first HbAlc following this a couple of weeks ago was 6%.

Although I have reduced my carb intake I still have the occasional portion of rice or potatoes - but these are much smaller portions than I used to eat. I eat lots of vegetables and have at least one or two pieces of fruit a day (not bananas or plums as they make me 'spike'). I have also found that my sweet tooth has almost disappeared - I don't have the cravings I used to for chocolate or biscuits. In fact I eat extremely well and enjoy my food.

Using a blood sugar meter will tell you what the best 'diabetes diet' is for your body. Use it and regain your health - you won't regret it.

This is what worked me me - but you will find, as I did that everyone is different and what works for one person doesn't work for another - so you have to find what works for you and the only way to do this is by testing yourself regularly.

Read everything on this forum, increase your knowledge about diabetes and then decide how you want to tackle it. There is lots of help here - take advantage of it. There is also a thread on here re coconut oil - type it into the search box to find.

Good luck Cindy - and take control.

Rita

 

[c4bubbles]

Thank you both for your advice and support.
Today is a new day and a fresh start.
After my big whingy vent last night , my positivity head is back on
Off to my slimming club and the chemist and I'll give my Doctor a call asap.
xxx

 

[wallycorker]

Hi Cindy,

You've had some great advice already from others above.

Diet is your most powerful tool in helping to sort out your Type 2 condition. I've been a Type 2 for nearly nine years and I'm still free of problems as far as I know - even after following very poor advice for around eight of those years.

You can read my story here:

viewtopic.php?f=20&t=10512

Best wishes - John

 

[c4bubbles]

Thank you John.
Your story is a real inspiration and has given me lots of ideas.
Cindy x

 

[Spiral]

Welcome to the forums, Cindy. Lots of great advice here.

Firstly, you need to stop feeling guilty and worrying about how you have handled things in the past. It isn't helpful and is getting in the way of you doing something positivie now. your story rings bells for me. My BMI was higher than yours when I started and I have had some really good results - my blood sugar readings are down and the weight is moving. I have to be half the woman I was at diagnosis :shock:

I think it is irrelevant whether or not you would be diagnosed as pre-diabetic if you were half a point lower. The line they draw to diagnose diabetes is because they have to put a line somewhere. Many of us think that line needs to be a lot lower and we are unhappy with the very poor standards of control that are described as adequate - they are set simply too high to avoid complications.

I wasn't happy with the very negative picture painted for diabetes and found it very depressing - and it just added to my feelings of guilt and depression. Us T2s don't have a very good image do we? We have no one else to blame because we are fat lazy slobs who brought our illness upon our selves. However your post gives the impression that you want to get good control and avoid the complications that "inevitably" go along with diabetes. I (and many others here) chose to beleive this condition doesn't have to be inevitably progressive - I need to have a bit of hope and the results I have had so far have give me that.

I think you need to inform yourself about how blood sugar works and then decide how you want to deal with your diabetes. The most useful information on blood sugar I found before I found my way here was at http://www.bloodsugar101.com an American website which now has the UK blood sugar readings listed too - this means it is much easier to read if you don't have American as a second language. Really simples! Americans measure blood glucose differently :roll:

The HbA1c test is a really useful measure for you (the American HbA1c is the same as the UK one). I'd say get it done asap! I reduced my HbA1c from 7.8% at diagnosis in Feb to 7% in May by cutting out all added sugar and junk food and adding fresh and raw, mostly glycaemic index (GI) principles. I went low carb in may and further reduced that to 6% on a low carb diet and no medication at all. I'm now taking metformin as I want to lose weight and get to a normal blood sugar a bit faster than diet alone.

Whatever you decide to do, you need a diet you can stick to for the rest of your life that will help you lose weight and manage your blood glucose, because that is how long you will be diabetic. There will be knock on benefits for you cholesterol and blood pressure, I think.

Pay for as little as possible! The drug companies are falling over themselves to get you to use their products, so ring up customer services and see if you can blag a meter from them. My main meter was a feebie from Roche - sent out by first class post which arrived the day after I called them. I have also acquired several finger pricking devices from this approach! I got a second meter from the competition at the top of this page. It isn't a real competition, give them your details and you will get a meter, but it may take a several weeks.

Take a look at the threads here for info on testing and the struggle some of us have in getting strips on the NHS. Many GPs/PCTs don't like us T2s to test :twisted: and we have to work hard to get a supply of strips on prescription. I have confirmed with my GP that he will prescribe me 50 a month, I buy the extras. It isn't fair, but every strip he gives me is one I don't have to buy myself.

Testing is expensive, so you need to know how to interpret the results so that you are not wasting strips. Testing is the single most useful thing I do to see how I'm going - and I got a huge buzz when I saw those levels falling very quickly as I tweeked my diet. I fail to see how we can gain control of our blood sugar without knowing what the food we do does once we have eaten it.

I supplement my 50 a month NHS strips with additional strips I buy from eBay. Check the sellers reputation and set a limit above which you will not go - mine is half the retail price but my last lot (which I bought in bulk) were considerably less. Some people buy direct from the manufacturer, which is cheaper. Anything you do buy, make sure you get the VAT exemption, but you may need to persist with this. I understand there is a VAT exemption for somewhere on this website. If you take any meds for your diabetes, you should be entitled to free prescriptions - this is not means tested - and covers all your prescriptions. It takes a while for the card to arrive tho...

I think that the health tests you have had are very positive results But running high blood sugar makes you feel ill. Since I reduced my readings I no longer get regular headaches or fatigue - I have a lot more energy. Since I dropped the carbs I have stopped getting indigestion and acid reflux. These health improvemenys happened very quickly. I have also lost fair bit of weight.

There are lots of different approaches and you need to find one that works for you. I made a number of stepwise changes, what made the biggest difference to me was dropping starch carbs. What works best for you may be different, it will take a lot of work to understand your diabetic body and I don't think you will be able to do that without testing.

I set myself regular targets. These are very simple - a better result at the next blood test. I'm aiming for normal blood sugar readings. You also need to decide what you want from your health care - this is your body and your diabetes. In not giving you very much info, your GP may have done you a favour as you found your way here 8)

What I do to manage my diabetes is against virtually every piece of advice my lovely GP has given me :roll: The NHS healthy plate advice makes my blood sugar hit unacceptably high levels. I think we spend a lot of time humouring each other :roll: but he is pleased with the improvements so he carries on prescribing me the strips, even though he disapproves of the fact I'm trying to get even tighter control of my blood sugar.

So take a look around here, especially in the diet and food forums. Ask questions, inform yourself and stop worrying - use the anxiety you have to find ways to improve your health.

 

[NickW]

Cindy,

As others have said, the important thing is that you're taking steps to control the condition. Many of us have had periods of not wanting to face up to it, that's just a normal human reaction - but as you've also been told, you're the only one who can actually do anything about it. It sounds like that's what you plan to do, so that's a great start!

I'm a T1 not a T2, but I read a lot about diabetes in general, and I personally think the key thing for the majority of T2's is to regain insulin sensitivity. T2 often occurs due to hyperinsulinemia - that is, chronically elevated levels of insulin. You then become insulin resistant because you're constantly over-exposed to insulin (an analogy I heard is like walking into a room where someone's wearing too much perfume; you smell it really intensely, but after a few minutes you stop smelling it. That's because the receptors in your nose have become desensitised to the smell. It's the same deal with insulin receptors in the body; flood them with insulin all the time and they don't work as well).

And of course, what makes you produce lots of insulin in the first place? Carbohydrates in the diet, particularly refined carbs.

The answer is then to remove the original problem - i.e. the carbohydrates that are spiking your insulin levels in the first place. Again to analogise - if you got sunburn, which is over-exposure to the sun, you'd know what to do - you'd get out of the sun!!! Similarly, if you've been over-exposed to insulin (by eating too many carbs), you want to... stop getting over-exposed to insulin (by stopping eating too many carbs).

All of this is a long-winded way of saying that my advice would be to move to a low-carb diet, ideally making as much of your food unprocessed and unrefined as possible. That means veggies, meat, fish, a little bit of fruit (not much!), nuts and seeds.

Don't go on a crash diet or anything - just move to good-quality foods first and foremost. A bit of exercise would be great, but again don't try to force yourself into massive amounts of exercise straight away, and choose something you enjoy (or will at least tolerate). This is all difficult and takes some willpower, but it sounds like you realise the gravity of the condition and want to do something about it.

Weight loss is important, but I personally think that focusing on the real problem - regaining your insulin sensitivity - is the primary goal, and often weight loss will come along for the ride anyway. There are cases of people achieving complete remission from T2D by doing this - that is, they come off ALL medication and have NORMAL blood glucose levels. Heck, there are even very rare cases of T1's regaining pancreatic function on a strict paleolithic diet.

Finally, all the best for your efforts in dealing with this - diabetes sucks, but we've got it and the only choices are to deal with it - and the consequences and difficulties that involves - or to ignore it and deal with those consequences and difficulties. And I for one intend to die with my feet on!

Cheers,
Nick.

 

[wallycorker]

Great stuff that Nick! I'm with you all the way!

Best wishes - John

 

[c4bubbles]

Hi Spiral ,
Thank you for all your advice.
You're right, the overwhelming feeling is guilt. The fact is that I've done this to myself, it was completely preventable and thanks to some really insidious pieces of writing in the press, I feel as if I'm a drain on NHS resources when these resources should be provided for those who are really ill...
I'm trying to focus only on the positive and everyone who has replied to my post has been hugely supportive. For that, I am beyond grateful. It's nice to feel that I'm not struggling with this on my own.
I've applied for the free meter through the competition and am looking forward to being able to test myself and find out what really going on with my health and then making some big desicions about how I'm going to affect positive change in my life.
I'l be tackling my doctor (possibly quite literally!) as soon as I can get an appointment and organising my HbA1c test asap.
Thank you again for taking the time to offer your advice
Cindy x

 

[c4bubbles]

Thanks Nick for all the info.
Argh... I have to admit being a complete carb addict (with addict being the operative word here)with a very, very sweet tooth. I'm a big fan of fresh fruit and smoothies. It helps tackle the sweet tooth problem a lot of the time too... What fruit can I have that will do the minimum damage? And low carbs? Sweet potatoes, brown rice, spelt pasta? Are any of these a possibility? Are wheat free products low carb?
SO many questions going on in my head :roll:
Thanks again.
Cindy x

 

[wallycorker]

I've never found that fresh fruit of any kind causes me any problems as far as blood glucose readings are concerned. I eat loads of fruit. However, some others report that certain fruits do cause them problems.

 

[c4bubbles]

Hi Wallycorker
Once I'm able to test myself on a regular basis, it'll become fairly obvious if fruit is something my body can tolerate or not...
I guess it's just a matter of trial and error?
Thanks.
Cindy x

 

[wallycorker]

Hi Wallycorker
Once I'm able to test myself on a regular basis, it'll become fairly obvious if fruit is something my body can tolerate or not...
I guess it's just a matter of trial and error?
Thanks.
Cindy x

Yes Cindy - it's a matter of trial and error but you should have a good idea of what is the sensible options after having read postings on this forum. Just gradually make the changes to your diet and you'll get there if you want to do it.

John

 

[c4bubbles]

Hi John,
So far (and it's only been a couple of days) cutting out carbs hasn't been too much of an issue. Rice and pasta and whole grain bread have always been staple foods in my diet, but so far, I haven't missed them. I've decided to up the amount of grains/nuts/seeds, as that is an area of weakness in my diet. I've upped my veggies (which I've always loved) and upped my fruit so that I don't get so hungry. Once I become really hungry, I lose all willpower and binge eat unhealthily.
I'm buying some organic cold pressed coconut oil tomorrow and have started looking into Agave nectar for those moments when something sweet is a necessity! Also researching honey and diabetes... I'll be searching tesco for some of the nut based granola and burgen bread you mention in your post too. I can handle eggs for breakfast every few days but I'm a toast/muesli girl at heart.
I have used a low GI diet before which proved successful in shifting a fair bit of weight and will start incorporating elements of that diet back into my life. I'm a little confused as to how fat fits into my diet (should I be really eating butter/cream/cheese if I'm trying to lose weight) and I'm not a huge meat eater either. Also, with regards to eggs, how many is too many?
I feel positive that I'll find something that works for me.
Thanks again for all your feedback and advice. Keep it coming
Cindy x

 

[Spiral]

Fat isn't fattening. Take a look at the success stories.

Since I have been low carbing I have eaten a lot more fat than I used to, although I have not has my lipids done since I started low carbing. I may ask for that when my GP exresses concern about my rapidly imporving health :roll: Can't win.

What is lethal is hydrogenated and transfat. I think the other fats are only a problem if you eat them with starchy carbs - but the message that low fat low sugar is the way to go is so widespread it is difficult to couter. Do a bit of reading around the diet and food forums.

I'm eating more fat and more protien than I was 4 months ago, and I have lost a lot of weight.

 

[wallycorker]

Hi Cindy,

You seem a little bit too anxious about trying to get things right from day one. That isn't necessary - just keep making small changes of replacing something something that isn't so good with something that you think will be better. That's all it takes!

I can tell that you are moving in the right direction and it is my opinion that those changes will lead to a big improvement. You will know better when you carry out some testing as to how different foods affect you.

I would describe my situation quite simply as low-fat, reduced carbohydrate with loads of fruit and vegetables, low alcohol intake and using low-GI wherever I can. I eat little bits of everything.

Best wishes - John

 

[NickW]

Hi Cindy,

It's great to hear that you're making such an effort with the diet already, well done!

As for your food choices, I'd actually suggest you stay away from adding more grains and fruit to your diet. Whole grain products (bread, pasta, cereal, museli) are still full of carbs and will still make controlling your blood sugar more difficult; and the majority of people are at least mildly intolerant of gluten and grains. I'd suggest simply avoiding all of this stuff - don't eat ANY rice, pasta, bread, cereal, museli... even supposedly healthy whole-grain stuff, brown rice etc. I know it's difficult at first - I was addicted to bread, potatoes etc. and struggled immensely at times - but in my opinion and experience it makes a massive difference to your control. Eggs for breakfast are an infinitely better option than toast or museli, even if you go for nut-based museli and burgen bread. As for too many eggs... I seriously wouldn't worry unless you start hitting more than a dozen a day. Try to go for true free range eggs (i.e. from small producers where you know the chickens roam free, not just supermarket "free range" where the chickens have theoretical access to the outdoors but in reality spend 95% of time inside) - this isn't from a "chicken welfare" point of view, it significantly changes the eggs' nutrient profile. Put simply, proper free range eggs are better for you.

You don't need to worry excessively about eating fat; it's carbohydrate that spikes your insulin output and drives type 2 diabetes. I wouldn't recommend eating lard straight from the fridge, but cooking with sensible amounts of butter or oil and using oil-based salad dressings etc. is absolutely fine.

I'd also suggest limiting the amount of fruit you eat. While it's certainly better than cake or chocolate, fruit is another source of sugar that will elicit a heavy insulin response and prolong your insulin resistance.

Ideally I'd suggest the majority of your meals should consist of:
- some lean meat, fish, or eggs
- a whole load of leafy veg (think broccoli, spinach, cauli, salads, med veg etc. rather than sweet potato, carrots, parsnips etc.)
- a bit of fat (e.g. an olive oil dressing, some butter over your fish, some nuts or seeds etc.)

I'd limit fruit to occasional use, and try to go for berries or other less-dense fruits (and steer clear of bananas at all costs - they'd LOADED with sugar). And I'd steer away from any sources of dense carbohydrate.

Like I say, this is a big change and may be difficult, and it also flies in the face of conventional wisdom. But it's an approach that has helped thousands of people. It's helped me get my lowest HbA1c ever, it's helped people achieve complete remission from type 2 diabetes, and I honestly think it's well worth trying. Not everyone wants to eat like this and that's fine, I don't intend to ram this down anyone's throat or claim that everyone should eat like this, but I think any diabetic who hasn't tried it is missing a potentially great chance to improve their lives dramatically.

Sorry if this is a bit of a brain dump. Discovering you're diabetic is a lot to take in anyway, then you get people giving you advice to totally change big parts of your life (e.g. your diet) - I think everyone just wants you to do well! But as someone said earlier don't worry about getting everything right from day one; no-one can. The important thing is that you're taking control of the situation. Keep reading up and learning what you can, make those changes you're able to, and just keep plugging away at it. And if there's anything you want to ask or want more information on, I'm sure loads of people here will help.

Cheers,
Nick.

 

[dmk12]

Hi Cindy
I can understand your feeling of denial and guilt as I have been there myself. Being able to test yourself puts the control back in your corner and not just taking the doctors word for your condition and treatment. I also have very high blood pressure and will be going to see a consultant about this on thursday, a lot of the blood pressure meds cause palpitations and this could be the feeling you are haveing with your heart. If it is upsetting you and making you stressed ask the doc to change your meds to something else and see if that helps. good luck.
D

 

[c4bubbles]

Thanks John, Nick and D ,
You advice is gratefully recieved.
I am feeling incredibly anxious as like an idiot I've been in denail for the past 8 months since diagnosis and I'm wondering what further damage I've done to myself but not acknowledging this issue earlier. I feel like I have to catch up somehow but I understand what you're all saying and will take it one (sane) step at a time
I've been reading so much information from this amazing site and the brilliant people on it and I'm feeling very positive, so thank you for that.
I don't know that I can cut out the majority of carbs completely (at least to begin with) but I know I can seriously cut down the amount of unhealthy carbs in my diet. I'm more likely to stick with the program if I wean myself of things like pasta, rice and bread. I should have more willpower but when it comes to food, this is a lifelong problem!
Anyway, I'm looking forward, focusing on the positive, not focusing on the things I can't do.
And D, it's interesting to hear that it might be my medication causing the palpitations. I'll bring it up with the doctor at my next appointment.
Thank you again taking the time to reply to my posts. It is very much appreciated,
Cindy x