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What do you do to deal with your feelings?

J

Just_Me_Rachel

Well-Known Member
Hi there,

This is my rant. I have to leave for work and I woke a 15, second morning in a row. I have no energy to get up and go. I have the sensor, and I've been high all night. I can't have high alarms go off because it'll go off too often.

I'm in the process of trying to get my blood sugars stable. It sucks, I feel depressed and frustrated with it. I'm allowing it to overtake my thoughts and energy and I don't want to do this anymore.

What do you guys do when you feel like this?

Thank you.
 
Just_Me_Rachel said:
Hi there,

This is my rant. I have to leave for work and I woke a 15, second morning in a row. I have no energy to get up and go. I have the sensor, and I've been high all night. I can't have high alarms go off because it'll go off too often.

I'm in the process of trying to get my blood sugars stable. It sucks, I feel depressed and frustrated with it. I'm allowing it to overtake my thoughts and energy and I don't want to do this anymore.

What do you guys do when you feel like this?

Thank you.
Click to expand...

It's very frustrating when after trying and trying the numbers just won't follow the rules! I try, notice I say try, to just treat each day as it comes. It gets worse if I don't keep my emotions under control so I have a rant, throw something and then take a deep breath! Back to your immediate problem ... I assume your basel insulin is high enough? Oddly enough I'm having the opposite problem at the mo and am having to reduce my background! Warmer weather perhaps?
Bloody annoying condition ain't it? Lol
 
Just_Me_Rachel said:
Hi there,

This is my rant. I have to leave for work and I woke a 15, second morning in a row. I have no energy to get up and go. I have the sensor, and I've been high all night. I can't have high alarms go off because it'll go off too often.

I'm in the process of trying to get my blood sugars stable. It sucks, I feel depressed and frustrated with it. I'm allowing it to overtake my thoughts and energy and I don't want to do this anymore.

What do you guys do when you feel like this?

Thank you.
Click to expand...
I have woken up at 5:00am with a glucose level above 26! I remember so well the frustration and sense of failure that comes with these situations. Do you remember what you consumed prior to retiring? Are you currently feeling ill or under stress? I am not familiar with pumps and monitors so my informatiin is limited. This sounds like a technical issue.
 
Hi @Just_Me_Rachel Yes I completely get this.. Firstly I try to recognise why, so was it too many carbs too little insulin, ate late etc, then it's correction and carry on. I try not to let numbers get me down anymore as otherwise your life will be ruled by imperfection, accepting that these happen and taking action to correct means I can move forward with my day. If I see a repeat then it's a basal test to check my doses are at the right level. I almost have a sign that appears in my head saying 'next' when I get one of these, which happened last night to me as I was at 14 mmol/l at 2 am, felt thirsty so woke tested, corrected, drank water and went back to bed, then woke at 6.7mmol/l.

As long as you know why, sort your correction dose and just carry on, don't let the numbers rule ;)
 
I try to see it as an annoyance rather than a huge failing or a catastrophe. As long as my BS isn't high enough to be dangerous, I have a little moan/swear in my head for a few seconds, then move on.

Nobody gets perfect blood sugars all the time so don't let a few high results get to you. Treat it as a puzzle - what caused the high, can you prevent it happening again, what would be a good correction dose, etc

I know it's horrible having to go to work when your BS is high and you're feeling bad. If I felt really off, I used to just let my manager/team/colleagues know so that they were aware why I was testing extra/drinking lots/walking around.
 
I woke this morning with a 15 and i haven't got a clue why. Genuinely. It makes no sense to me. Yes. It annoyed me. However, it's just one reading and i deal with it. Give a correction and then monitor it until it reverts back to normal.
If you beat yourself up over every "bad" reading, you will go certifiably insane. If you try to make sense of every single reading you will go certifiably insane.

Try and view the diabetes as a pattern and manage the pattern as opposed to the specific number. If the 15 was a one off then you just need to forget about it and move on. But if the pattern is you waking high each morning, then address the pattern. The sensor should indicate when you are spiking and then it is a case of making incremental changes to your basal rates or your eating habit before bed (bolus ratio and/or type of foods - high fat is difficult for me to manage!)

Diabetes sucks. It sucks now. It will suck tomorrow and forever more. That's a fact. No point in focusing on the problem. Focus on the solution and work towards better control.

Best of luck.

Mark
 
Thank you so much for your response. Turns out, I went a little late to work. Just couldn't do it, feeling the lack of energy I did.

Turns out, I've had three low / just caught it but still feel it low blood sugars since then. I'm starved, craving food, I am. My body is going nuts, it is.

I don't want to eat because I don't want to go high. But I'm hungry, I am. I have to learn the rules as if I'm newly diagnosed. What's ok, what's not ok, what I can eat, what will hurt me. It's taking alot of patience -

And, I'm so damned hungry. My blood sugars are dropping, I feel it.
 
Hi @Just_Me_Rachel - You need to eat Rachel, as Azure has said it will only make you feel miserable.

Can you run us through your bg readings today and carbs eaten plus insulin taken, having 3 low episodes isn't something you want to repeat so maybe some analysis on the day's events ?

Try not to get wound up, stress doesn't help your bg levels, you need to accept that some days it will be hard, no 2 days are the same, but knowing what to do when your levels are out of synch will help you cope better mentally, it's like having a plan of action.
 
It was a low hungry. Feel better, somewhat. How do you guys keep doing it?? I constantly wanna go back to bad habits, i.e dig my head under the sand, not face it.

What do you do to keep yourself from despair, other than not take it so seriously. I like the **** curse thing, with this BS I got little choice

So, my day looked like this:

8am,. 16. 4units

9.30am. Coffee&choc, 16carbs,no insulin

1.30pm. 3.6 coffee, choc, wholewheat roll , 3units

3.30pm 18. 4units

5.30pm. 2pieces low carb ww bread with eggs and thin layer peanut butter. 1.65units

7pm. 3.9 (feeling low). 15carbs sugar water

9pm 3.9.
 
@Just_Me_Rachel I will be honest a few years after being diagnosed I did get pretty obsessed with numbers and came on here feeling like it was the end of the world until someone told me to stop obsessing and just accept each reading but to know when to take action, life is too short to constantly obsess, it will take over your life if you let it. You don't have to bury your head in the sand, just take more notice of what's going on, yes it does take some effort to sort it when it goes awry but it will come good again so have a little faith.

The fact that you had a hypo this evening without active insulin on board at 9pm, means you have to do some basal testing Rachel, once you've established that your basal is holding you steady then review your carb insulin ratios, also is this a repeat pattern so did the same thing happen last night ?
 
just trying to work out from those numbers what some of your settings on your pump might be

is your correction factor 1u reduces blood sugar by 3 mmol ?
and is your carb ratio in the pump at 17 carbs per 1u insulin ?

and finally --- are you speaking with your DSN and letting her know how you feel , and that you are getting these highs and lows ??
 
Thanks for that Juicy, I'm glad to hear I'm not alone.... Stressing and obsessing over my diabetes is also a comfort zone for me.. it's time I find a life outside of this, too. I do need to do all the basal testing and ratio testing.

Himtoo, lol no, my pump settings are set to 1:6 insulin to carbs and 1:2 (sometimes 1:2.5) to lower.

I spoke to my DSN re my numbers, I need to get back in touch with her. I do have a therapist I see, but right now, frankly, I could be BTDT. People who actually get it.

Thanks for your help guys.
 
ok -- so I am only out by thirty squillion % :D
( I think I was hopefully thinking it might cause you to revue your settings with your DSN -- :) )
 
People have already covered some methods of treating/solving the problem, I thought I'd mention some tips for the emotional side of things.
  • Sometimes you just can't prevent these sorts of things happening - it's not always your fault. I like to categorise diabetes problems into three areas so I can problem solve most effectively - 1: "completely your fault", 2:"you know why it happened but it wasn't your fault", and 3:"completely not your fault". Some examples of these...1: not taking your medication deliberately, eating something you know you shouldn't, 2: ate too much to fix a hypo, got your bolus incorrect, incorrectly predicted the effect of exercise on your blood sugar, 3: bent cannula, insulin gone bad, getting sick. When things in category 3 happen to me I just deal with them to the best of my ability, but keep reminding myself that I couldn't have known it was going to happen and I tried my hardest to fix it, there's nothing I could have done better. I think accountability and responsibility are very important, but sometimes category 3 things just happen to you and beating yourself up about it won't stop it happening again.
  • Try to remember one GOOD diabetes management thing that happened recently to remind yourself that you can do this and good things do happen. I want to emphasise here that we're focussing on EFFORT, not just results. So a perfect FBG, or a great CGM graph are definitely achievements to be proud of, but you should also congratulate yourself for trying hard, not just being perfect. Effort-based things to celebrate: doing all your finger pricks all day/week, sticking to your diet all day/week, sticking to your exercise routine, recognising hypos, managing another illness, visiting a doctor/educator for help.
  • If possible, put off chores/other unappealing tasks and just relax for a bit - I hate being high and if my blood sugars are seriously out of control while I am, say, doing my homework, I will just put it aside for a while and do something fun. I'm already miserable from being out of control so I feel like I deserve a bit of a treat.
 
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