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Why don't people get it?

Discussion in 'Diabetes Soapbox - Have Your Say' started by Outlier, Mar 21, 2022.

  1. Outlier

    Outlier · Well-Known Member

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    Someone I haven't seen since before the first covid lockdown will be visiting the area and asked if she could come to see me. "I'll bring some cakes".

    Sigh.
     
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  2. Rokaab

    Rokaab Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    Do you know what all your friends/acquaintances medical conditions involve?

    If you don't have a condition or know someone closely that does then chances are you wont know a lot of stuff about it either.
     
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  3. Antje77

    Antje77 LADA · Moderator
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    I can understand how you don't remember the dietary wishes from people you haven't seen in over two years.
    Unless you have been talking about your diabetes and the way you manage all the time with your friend, why would you expect them to think of that right away?
     
  4. lovinglife

    lovinglife Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Why should they? I have friends with various conditions and my knowledge of all of them is very basic. We saw friends last weekend after 2.5 years and to be honest they could have brought sugar mice coated in honey and I’d still have been like a puppy with two tails to see them - just enjoy the time with your friend and ignore the cakes.
     
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  5. Outlier

    Outlier · Well-Known Member

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    I've been T2 since September. She has known for a month less than I have known. And yes: I do expect friends to remember something this important. I remember what my friends have told me too.
     
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  6. Goonergal

    Goonergal Type 2 · Master
    Retired Moderator

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    I’m with you @Outlier . I might forget someone doesn’t like Brussel sprouts, but I wouldn’t take alcohol to someone who doesn’t drink, or bread to a coeliac or gluten free friend.
     
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  7. MrsA2

    MrsA2 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    If only it were that simple!!
    I'm fine until confronted with one in my or someone else's home.
    I can ignore them in shops and restaurants, but brought as a gift to a home...how can anyone say "no"?
     
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  8. jaywak

    jaywak Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    I think all my friends and family know I have type 1 but the amount of times I visit them and get offered massive carb filled food and pie and ice cream for afters , I think they think i'me being over the top when I say sorry I can't eat all that , but unless you suffer an illness yourself why would you really know what it does , I get people saying a little of what you fancy wont do you any harm not realising yes it does to me .
     
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  9. Fenn

    Fenn Type 1.5 · Well-Known Member

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    Without people misunderstanding, we would miss out on “are you really going to eat that?” #smugface
     
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  10. HSSS

    HSSS Type 2 · Expert

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    I don’t think the issue is people being unaware (as many have said unless they have it or deal with it closely they may not know.) It’s the one who do very well know and ignore it anyway.

    I have family who at the very least are capable of remembering I have diabetes and restrict some foods, especially sugary stuff. That’s really not hard to remember. Nor is it hard to ask to be reminded if particular foods are ok or not. But they insist on trying to feed me rubbish. And mock me for it. They also are totally paranoid about another family members nut allergy. (Which I understand as I grew up with a nut anaphylactic person). So they take one health and dietary condition seriously but not another.
     
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  11. zand

    zand Type 2 · Master

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    I would not eat the cake and let the friend take the ones she hadn't eaten back home with her.
     
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  12. searley

    searley Type 1 · Moderator
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    I know a lot about my diabetes as I live with it every day.... but most around me don't have a clue even though they have been told.. and some can only just remember their own name from day to day..

    Then there is the other end of the spectrum where people assume I cant have something.. which as a T1 I can have what I want
     
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  13. Lamont D

    Lamont D Reactive hypoglycemia · Master

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    If I didn't tell everyone constantly, they would never imagine how my diet works, what I can eat or don't want to eat, they don't bring me treats, they ignore my pleas for fresh food, when I eat or don't eat when my big family has parties. Or when I used to travel away in a hotel or restaurant!
    but the worst is, my wonderful other half when she forgets and asks, if I want a butty or some nice spuds to have with my meat or do I fancy this or you used to love them! Or forgets that I fast everyday!
    My son's offer breakfast or brunch!
    As long as I remember, and not tempted or persuaded to have a bite of something I would call baddies!

    And I do, believe it or not, I bore my former colleagues, friends, neighbours and of course family with my constant health issues!
    And if I didn't tell you of my experience, you probably wouldn't be aware of RH, and my other conditions that have interfered with my life.
    So, of course you will remember this!
    My conditions..........

    Late Reactive Hypoglycaemia
    Lactose intolerance
    Hypertension
    Essential Tremor disorder
    Restless legs syndrome
    Burning Itching
    Anxiety
    Depression
    Arthritis
    Bad back
    Shin splints
    Varicose veins
    Bald
    Slightly overweight
    Aversion to cooked vegetables

    And I am very healthy according to my last full blood panel tests!

    So don't forget to remember all this and don't be surprised if they ask a question or two!

    Regards
     
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  14. Fenn

    Fenn Type 1.5 · Well-Known Member

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    Bald? Is that a condition? I’m changing my list to include occasional hiccups:)
     
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  15. Riva_Roxaban

    Riva_Roxaban Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    One of the Blue Care nurses that come to my place to dress my leg wound, always brings a "low carb' cake as she knows I am T2 for smoko.

    It works out ok on my daily carb allowance on my moderate lchf menu.

    I see you have "longevity" as well.

     
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  16. jape

    jape Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    If some doctors don't even know that cakes are bad for diabetics, how can we expect lay people to be up to date with the fact that cakes are bad, bad, bad, bad for diabetics???
     
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  17. Lampman

    Lampman Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Your question is why don't they get it. I suppose the simple answer is they do not live with it themselves, and do not understand it. My doctor had a chart on her office wall showing that famous plate of food for diabetics, with one third carbs. Friends not knowing or remembering is one thing, but the doctor? I have two daughters, one with her own dietary requirements because of a (non diabetic) condition. She remembers my diet. The other one still buys me sweets at times.
     
  18. Shecat

    Shecat Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    I am sorry she is so insensitive and yes it hurts!
     
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  19. jaywak

    jaywak Type 1 · Well-Known Member

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    To show how ignorant people are of diabetes I told some new neighbours that I was diabetic, to get a reply of what type because you know there are 2 types one were you mustn't eat sugar and one were you have eat sugar !
     
  20. nicki92

    nicki92 Type 1 · Active Member

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    It's hard isn't it... after six months with type 1 I'm already tired of having to explain to people that I can eat anything I want to. I have one friend I see all the time who keeps buying healthy-looking snacks because she assumes they're better for me - like non-potato crisps. I feel like if I'm injecting anyway -- which I still have to with vegetable crisps! -- it doesn't make a difference whether it's one unit or five and I'd rather eat something I'm going to enjoy. I'm happy to say yes or no to people when it comes to food, I'd just rather be given the choice myself and not have people trying to make that choice for me.

    At the same time I understand it's very different if you have type 2, and please don't take this as me trying to minimise or invalidate your experience - just putting the other perspective out there as I think it is difficult either way.
     
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