I know how you feel. This happened to me a few weeks ago.
Well I bought this cook book. It uses various nut flours to bake all sorts of breads, crackers, breadsticks, desserts etc. I have been looking forward to eating this stuff, very low carb.
The nut flours are very expensive and I have been eagerly awaiting my Amazon purchases. Finally I got the last one today. Great!!
So I started.
Then OH comes into the kitchen and needs my space.
I leave.
I have been gathering the ingredients and I start mixing the dry stuff. Where is the baking powder? I distinctly remember getting it out of the cupboard. So I look for this for about 20 minutes. Then I find a very old tub at the back of the cupboard. This will have to do, good thing I didn't throw it out.
Can't find the dried parsley, dried chives will have to do.
OK, the wet ingredients. 1 table spoon of butter, melted.
Into the microwave. Microwave starts flashing and making a racket. Turn off microwave. MIKE!!! He eventually turns up. He tries it and says OMG and turns it off.
OK melt the butter in a saucepan. Whisk the eggs and add the melted butter. Whisk again.
Add the dry ingredients. Whisk into a stiff batter. STIFF??? I can hardly move the ****** stuff.
OK get the kitchen aid out. Not used it for about 10 years. It needs a wash. Ready to go. Fire it up and..... it doesn't work. Dead as a dodo. Go on line looking for hints. No go.
I can't mix this stuff by hand.
Stick blender. Whisk attachment. I look at the contents of the bowl. It is not strong enough for that.
I am not a natural baker. What to do. I add an egg white and start whisking. For about 3 seconds. Get a Tea Towel and put it over the bowl to try and keep the contents off the walls, try again.
I certainly wouldn't have called it a batter. Carried on. Heated the oil for deep frying. Instructions are to use a soup spoon and use your finger to slide the batter gently into the hot oil. OK. Peel the batter of the spoon and stand back as it hits the oil.
I only had the energy to make 5 or 6.
I had 4 for dinner but forgot to test my blood 2 hours afterwards. I did three and a half hours. Readings good but too late to be accurate for my purposes.
In my bowl I still have a quantity of mixture the Romans would have been proud to call cement.
Ordered a new microwave.
Edited by mod for profanity.