Chat for ASD families

[Adamtally]

He's was just over 2 and a half we had our suspicions but he is great

 

[13lizanne]

We had to wait until our boy was 3.1/2 before we could get a referral. It was hard to get a diagnosis 24yrs ago and then there were no services available to help. We got all our knowledge from the internet (just like this website + diabetes ), mostly from out of USA Our son is pretty great too and we love him to bits but it was really difficult back then as very few people had heard of Autism far less understood it. I'm glad that it's different nowadays. Your son will have a fine life with you for his parent, you obviously adore him.

 

[ickihun]

Guys is their such a thing as mild asperges? The symptoms on Wikipedia describes my o/h on a bad day. GP has given him antidepressants which helps with depression and anxiety but we has gone from doing day to day duties to struggling to complete anything. He verbally lashes out in anger and frustration. Verbally communicating in a very negative confused way. He is constantly on edge and has in the past used alcohol to relax giving him more of a problem.
I have no experience with any autism or spectrums. Your posts are brilliant and they're educating me.
O/h has an autistic brother and his other brothers son is autistic too.
Is it in the genes? Or does it get triggered some how?
I'm sorry if I sound ignorant but I truely haven't any knowledge, til now of autism and it's make-up. :-(

 

[13lizanne]

Hi @ickihun from what you say about your o/h and his family history it sounds like there might be a case to ask your GP for a referral for tests. I don't have personal experience of this (genetic link) as our son's autism was triggered by vaccine damage. Hopefully the other posters will be along soon to help. Chin up pet x

 

[4ratbags]

@ickihun does your OH resemble his brother in appearance at all as my mother in law, my OH, my daughter, my son and my grand daughter all look similar to each other and they are the ones with all the issues so it can definately be a gene issue. My mother in law was diagnosed by her Dr 44 years ago with post natal depression which she.is still on a myriad of pills for and the Dr who diagnosed my children and GD told me that it was more than likely not post natal depression after all these years but more something to do on the spectrum and.he actually wanted me to take my OH in to get tested but he refused to go. My OH is very unsocial so his farm job suits him well (he doesnt have to deal with people), he tends to talk at you not to you, if I do something different he gets upset because I did it differently and he cant understand why and everything is just black and white, if things have always been done one way they should always be.done that way, he cant see there should be a.gray area to move within. The worst thing is that he takes everthing literally so if you make a joke or comment it can turn bad rather quickly. Do you tjink your OH wouls be open to being assessed, if not that is understandable and there are a myriad of tools ect online that you should be able to access.

 

[hankjam]

Hi @hankjam I meant to say last night, have you tried Scottish Autism they have a family worker and could send you information on Clannalba if you and your wife would be interested. We found them very very good, nothing was too much trouble and our lad seemed to enjoy it [most of the time]

Hi @13lizanne not yet... we are more heads in the sand at the moment... glad to hear your son has benefited from them. They have an outpost in Dundee, which we have meant to get in touch with.... but not done yet....

 

[Shar67]

The way the ASD was described to me was to think of a circle with several different width rings inside, the closer to the centre ring the more autistic you are, everyone is on the spectrum it is just most people are on the outside ring of the circle.

 

[Diamum5972]

Guys is their such a thing as mild asperges? The symptoms on Wikipedia describes my o/h on a bad day. GP has given him antidepressants which helps with depression and anxiety but we has gone from doing day to day duties to struggling to complete anything. He verbally lashes out in anger and frustration. Verbally communicating in a very negative confused way. He is constantly on edge and has in the past used alcohol to relax giving him more of a problem.
I have no experience with any autism or spectrums. Your posts are brilliant and they're educating me.
O/h has an autistic brother and his other brothers son is autistic too.
Is it in the genes? Or does it get triggered some how?
I'm sorry if I sound ignorant but I truely haven't any knowledge, til now of autism and it's make-up. :-(

In my experience it definitely is genetic -my late dad showed Aspergers symptoms, my younger brother and son have been diagnosed and even my older brother has symptoms as well. Unfortunately he is the most stubborn out of all of us so won't even entertain the idea of going to the doctor about it. Although my brothers and son fit the general profile of ASD they all show individual traits. My son also suffers from depression and anxiety, when he was younger we wondered if he had ADHD because his dad was hyperactive as a child. Apparently there is a link between autism and several other neurological disorders including ADHD and depression

 

[13lizanne]

How do you cope with looking after your child/grandchild when you are ill?
@Diamum5972 how did your day out with your friend go?

 

[Diamum5972]

It went really well thanks, we had a lovely pub lunch and after a potter round the shops we went to IKEA for a cuppa and bumped into my brother I was good, I had a skinny chicken breast burger with extra salad instead of chips and I only ate half of the bun

 

[13lizanne]

@Diamum5972 That's impressive I've just eaten half a bag of potato sticks - well, I was only following @KimG 's advice lol

 

[mo53]

Everyone needs a treat now and again

 

[Diamum5972]

I've had a problem lately with DS, he's become obsessed with use by dates. He has quite a limited diet anyway but if anything he eats is within a couple of days of the use by date he won't touch it. Bread is the biggest problem, he will only eat one brand and if it tastes slightly different I have to throw out the whole loaf. Luckily we have a Sainsburys quite near to us (15 minute walk) so it's quite easy to get a replacement but he's getting more and more anxious about food in general. Now he's started asking what the use by date is on everything he eats and it's getting on my nerves! I don't want to say anything to him in case it makes him even more anxious so I hope you lot don't mind me ranting about it

 

[4ratbags]

Oh no that must make life even more difficult. My second eldest daughtet is like.that but thankfully she doesnt live with us, whew.

 

[13lizanne]

Hi @Diamum5972 the hard thing about this is your son knows that there are use by dates on lots of things and can read them? I'm tempted to say tell him a date in advance of the actual date, I know most people would throw up their hands in horror at "lying" to DS but they don't have to live with it. My lad can't speak but shows his anxiety by pulling on my arm or making noises "adoo adoo adoo" non stop. You have my heartfelt sympathy x

 

[Diamum5972]

You hit the nail right on the head Lizanne, he's always been a good reader and is working for his English GCSE so there's no pulling the wool over his eyes! He gets quite paranoid and if he thinks I have an ulterior motive he will check it himself. If I did "stretch the truth" all hell will break loose! It's only really been bad this last year, he had a breakdown last Easter and since then he's really struggled with his mental health.

 

[13lizanne]

What a shame, poor lad. I think the hardest thing is seeing your child suffer, I would rather suffer myself. It's so frustrating when you can't help them, I suppose this is when we just need to keep loving them and trying to keep calm. Love to you both x

 

[Shar67]

I would invest in a date stamper so you can stamp your own date on.
My son had to just have same amount of food everyday, like 15 peas or pieces of carrot, I would try to cheat but failed, which got us on the subject of trying things that were different not in routine.

 

[Diamum5972]

What a shame, poor lad. I think the hardest thing is seeing your child suffer, I would rather suffer myself. It's so frustrating when you can't help them, I suppose this is when we just need to keep loving them and trying to keep calm. Love to you both x

Oh absolutely, that's why having friends who understand is so important. I count myself lucky, I can also talk to my mum any time about it. My younger brother suffered from depression when he was a teenager and even talked about suicide when he was bullied. Luckily he had counselling when he went to uni and was diagnosed with Aspergers so things got much easier after that. Mum and I love having our natters, we can ***** and moan about the boys as much as we want!

 

[Diamum5972]

Hi everyone, I'm worried about DS. He's been on a carby kick lately - all he seems to eat is sandwiches crisps and crackers! The part that's worrying me the most is the diabetes symptoms, he's tired all the time, grumpy and constantly thirsty. He drinks Volvic touch of fruit sugar free and is going through 2 big bottles a day. I can't keep up! I know it's Saturday but he's only just getting up now, god knows what he's going to be like on Monday when he has to go to college! I'm going to have a word about testing him for diabetes, wish me luck!