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Dear judgemental person

Discussion in 'Diabetes Soapbox - Have Your Say' started by AdamJames, Apr 4, 2018.

  1. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Dear Judgemental Person,

    I'm sorry for choosing to be fat and having T2.

    I didn't try to gain weight in my youth of walking, climbing, cycling, tennis and martial arts, but I admit I do like food. I am ashamed of that. Every time I look at a picture of burger and chips, I feel desire and I know I should really be feeling self-hatred. I'll try to work on that. I understand that it is only fair that I should be facing an increased risk of blindness, heart attack, kidney failure and amputation as punishment for giving in to eating things I liked and were readily available to me every day. I should have eaten things I didn't like, which must be what you do.

    I am sorry that these days I only walk up hills for an hour every night after work in the p***ing rain and cold in a pathetic, lazy effort to deal with T2. And on the weekends, well the biggest walk I've managed recently is Snowdon, and I screwed that up by having two slices of fake low-carb bread when I got home just so I could pretend that I am eating food I actually like. I am so sorry. I just can't get anything right. I am pathetic.

    I mean, I know I've never actually stolen food from anyone. And I know on occasions where food needs to be shared, such as when out hiking for days with friends, that I make d**n sure we all get the same. And yes, I often used to get cake at lunch time to share with people at work - people who gratefully accepted it and are thin. But none of that changes the fact that I deserve to be punished for those times when I actually enjoyed eating what I want - that's just selfish greed.

    I don't believe this nonsense that science talks about - insulin what? Genetics what? Hunger hormones? Nonsense! Life is a level playing field, allowing us all to easily judge each other. We are all born the same, with the same bodies, and we experience the same things in life and have the same tastes. When I was standing there eating my bacon sandwich, the person next to me eating the salad was *pretending* to like it - they in fact must have wanted my bacon sandwich, but they were morally superior to me and so made the morally right decision.

    I am now trying my best to atone for my sins. I have greatly reduce the range of foods I allow myself to eat and I am learning to eat things I don't like the taste of. I will ignore all the people around me who can eat whatever they want and I will not be jealous. I will spend the rest of my life counting carbs and calories. And I'm losing weight, and will gratefully accept that I'll probably spend the rest of my life with a low BMR, needing to eat much less than other people to stay thin.

    That's if I can even get thin. Some lazy T2 slob on this forum tried eating 800 calories a day for 8 weeks recently and his weight loss stalled - he was pathetic, like me. But I will try. This is the least I can do to make up for my decadent past.

    And when I'm thin, I'll still have T2, but I accept tha... what? What's that you say? When I'm thin you won't judge me any more? Wow, now THERE'S an incentive to lose weight.

    You arrogant p***k. If I beat this thing it will be for me, not you.

    Sincerely.

    Edited by moderator for language
     
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    #1 AdamJames, Apr 4, 2018 at 2:26 PM
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 4, 2018
  2. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    I'm sorry, I'm finding it hard to breathe after reading another thread and I had to get ... things ... off my chest.
     
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  3. karen8967

    karen8967 Type 1 · Expert

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    no need for apologies you said what was in your heart and i applaud that :)
     
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  4. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    You're very kind, thank you :)
     
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  5. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    I must say I love the fact that someone has tagged an angry rant as 'informative' :)
     
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  6. JoKalsbeek

    JoKalsbeek I reversed my Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    This. Oh lord, so much this... Thank you.
     
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  7. LittleGreyCat

    LittleGreyCat Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Information is information.:)

    At least we learned something today.:cool:

    Oh, and keep fighting the good fight!!
     
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  8. lindijanice

    lindijanice Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Hey @AdamJames, you are a winner in my book for putting in black and white what so many of us have felt over the years - the looks, the comments, the snickers, etc......but haven't had the nerve to put it out there. It took me a long time to admit that much of my life I spent trying to "do/eat the right things" to make, in my mind, people happy with me, and in the end, it was never enough....now, I care about me, I care about how I feel about myself, I care about what I am doing to make me happy with me, I care about what I am achieving on this journey of life for no one else but me. And now, I view others in a very different light as well, if you like me, fine, if you don't, your loss. Good for you Adamjames - keep at it!! Cheers/L
     
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  9. rom35

    rom35 Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    me - informative. Because it is not about "Judgemental Person", but about your feelings, how your psychic cope with T2D.
     
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  10. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Yes, it's a pity that we have to cope with the psychological effect of judgmentalism on top of all the other stuff. It's a really difficult subject for all of us, I think. It particularly irks me that the people who judge most loudly and publicly are often the least informed.

    And then there's the humane side of it all - even if someone has made mistakes in life, that doesn't make them evil and they don't deserve to be punished, and ridiculed, and hated for it.

    I think people have this idea in their head of someone with T2 saying "I'm going to eat these 100 pies and you are going to pay my medical bill". But that's just not the way it is. Behind T2 there is a lot of dietary misinformation, unhappiness, guilt, misery and an environment piled with unhealthy food.

    I think sometimes people are so fixated on judging certain people that they forget there are actually genuinely bad people out there who murder and rape. Presumably the rapists and murderers would need to be fat and Type 2 in order to be the target of that judgmentalism.

    Anyway I love the 'informative' tag and I see I now have a 'creative' one! I might end up with a full house :) Presumably someone could find it 'useful' on some level and tag it as useful? Not sure how, but I live in hope!
     
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  11. Antje77

    Antje77 LADA · Moderator
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    There you go! Only 2 left now :p
    And it is useful too. One could print it and shove it under the nose of the next judgemental person they meet, saving themselves the breath and time to answer someone who you don't want to be talking to anyway! I don't see how that is not useful :)
     
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    #11 Antje77, Apr 4, 2018 at 4:04 PM
    Last edited: Apr 4, 2018
  12. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Haha! Brilliant. I love you.

    What ones are left, let me see...
     
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  13. LooperCat

    LooperCat Type 1 · Expert

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    I’ll put my hands up and confess to being a bit judgemental in the past, although never out loud, having believed the “lifestyle-induced” stuff. But since I joined up here, and read a lot of the T2 posts, I’ve come to realise how wrong I’ve been. As a result I’ve changed the kind of answers I’m giving to my close friend who has T2 when he asks me about diabetes things, gently suggesting he makes some of the changes you guys have said helped you rather than the standard NHS “lose weight, move more” mantra.

    This really hit it home. Hence my <3 react x
     
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  14. Rachox

    Rachox Type 2 (in remission!) · Moderator
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    Well said @AdamJames, good to get things off your chest from time to time, even if it did give the mods some work! :joyful:
     
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  15. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Haha! I bet the mods love it really, getting to edit all those dirty words :) Well okay, I do feel a bit naughty. Sorry mods! Well I know who it was and she sent me a very polite message.

    Don't worry, if you get elected as a mod I'll make darn sure you have your work cut out for you. I won't be using the word 'darn' when you are on, that's for sure.
     
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  16. satindoll

    satindoll Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    @AdamJames ......One to go then you'll have a full house......seriously though........ you have managed to put into words...... emotions that I'm sure a lot of us feel or have felt....... more power to your pen.......:writer:
     
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  17. Antje77

    Antje77 LADA · Moderator
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    @AdamJames still needs the 'creative' and the 'agree' icons for his full house. Surely someone can come up with a nice justification for those two.
     
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  18. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    Hurrah! Thank you for your 'optimism' :)
     
  19. AdamJames

    AdamJames Type 2 · Well-Known Member

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    I think I've got full house now, thanks to an 'agree' from @bulkbiker! That works for me on so many levels :) Thanks BB!
     
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  20. Rachox

    Rachox Type 2 (in remission!) · Moderator
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    Do you get a prize? I’ve never seen a post with a complete set! :joyful: :hilarious:
     
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