getting back on the wagon

Have a very big hug from me. So sorry to hear you're struggling today -- though entirely relatable given your dream about the cat and feeling you can hear him.

Just try to get through the next meal. The following one might be a lot easier.

Remember you're not alone. We have got your back.

Really, really well done, @lucylocket61. How are you feeling?

Personally, I wouldn't worry too much about eating a bit more or about measuring blood sugars for the time being . You've been low carbing long enough and know from experience that blood sugars will come down eventually anyway once you eliminate most carbs. (By the way I didn't measure glucose levels for almost a whole year after diagnosis (too chicken to do this), just changed my way of eating and it worked fine.)

Start using your meter again when you feel ready.

lucylocket61 said:

Please dont use this thread to tell me off, I know i have stuffed up.

Five weeks ago my father died suddenly. Last week I had to have my cat put to sleep, he was 19 years old.

I cant stop eating for the past week. All the things I shouldnt eat. Eating and eating. I know I am eating my feelings, and not addressing them, but I am in a loop now and need some ideas to get stop this and deal with my emotions in a constructive way.I have no access to any counselling and have at least another 11 months to go on the waiting list for cbt.

On top of this, I have been prescribed metformin SR for my PCOS. I feel like a failure for having to resort to meds.

Basically, I am in a mess and need some constructive advice please.

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I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Please stop to beat yourself up! Many of us lose track when our situations are extraordinary. Have done that myself. I hope you will find help with the Samaritans!

With regard to your blood glucose level, take it slowly. May be it is wise to start to measure your bgl in the morning and two hours after breakfast. When you feel that you master your bgl after your breakfasts, please chose another meal you will try to go in for. I thought the dinners was worst to plan (when I was in grief). Remember grief is not a quick fix. If you don't get control over your daily bgl after trying for some time. May be the best will be to ask your GP for medication temporally (higher dosage if you already use meds).

lucylocket61 said:

I am still feeling very upset, but without self loathing and guilt added to the mix.

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Then that sounds like a good moment in you day,
not easy to do, so good for you.

Tough days and months, with a smattering of good moments,
that eventually get longer and longer
that's the rhythm of grieving.

@ziggy_w makes a great point, do what suits YOU, when you are ready for it.

Take care.

lucylocket61 said:

I am still feeling very upset, but without self loathing and guilt added to the mix.

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Glad to hear that guilt and self-loathing is gone, probably didn't help to have this in the mix also. The rest will certainly take a quite a while, I am sure.

I do own a cat myself, can't imagine life when she's gone (though I know this will eventually happen), so I absolutely empathize. It's like part of you is missing.

lucylocket61 said:

I am still feeling very upset, but without self loathing and guilt added to the mix.

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You have every right to be upset. Not having the self-loathing and guilt added to that though, is a great stride forward. You be good to yourself, okay?