Please dont use this thread to tell me off, I know i have stuffed up.
Five weeks ago my father died suddenly. Last week I had to have my cat put to sleep, he was 19 years old.
I cant stop eating for the past week. All the things I shouldnt eat. Eating and eating. I know I am eating my feelings, and not addressing them, but I am in a loop now and need some ideas to get stop this and deal with my emotions in a constructive way.I have no access to any counselling and have at least another 11 months to go on the waiting list for cbt.
On top of this, I have been prescribed metformin SR for my PCOS. I feel like a failure for having to resort to meds.
Basically, I am in a mess and need some constructive advice please.
I'm so sorry for your losses... *big hug*
I fell off the wagon when our cat was put to sleep two weeks ago, that was hard enough. I can't imagine losing a parent as well in such a short time span, so no, I'm not surprised you fell off the wagon too, and can't imagine anyone here having the gall to tell you off. (They'd be told off in turn, I'm sure!). They always say life happens. Well, death happens too, and the ones remaining behind are left to deal with the repercussions in whatever way we can. And sometimes that's eating, because there isn't a quick fix for grief, healing from losses takes time, far as it is possible to begin with (I feel we incorporate the loss, rather than "get over it". It just becomes part of who we are somehow). Even if something doesn't fix what we're feeling, it at least means we're doing something, be it constructive or not, because we feel powerless and overwhelmed and hey... Food! So do give yourself a break here eh. Every day is a new day, and you can get back on the wagon every time you open your eyes in the morning. If it doesn't work because pain is too big right now, then hey, you get another morning the day after. Just keep trying, and
don't give up on yourself. And ditch the high carb food, just toss it out or give it to the food bank... Stock up on low carb, bindgeworthy things. (That helped me this past week, otherwise my husband's chocolate stash would be completely gone now. And he has a
lot.)
Should you talk to someone? Probably. A professional? Maybe. But there's quite a few folks here who know what it's like to be in your shoes (diet/diabetes wise), so you can always connect with someone here, I'm sure. (If typing counts as talking). I live a pretty isolated life myself, because people are just plain difficult, so I do get there sometimes is just no-one around you can talk to who actually
understands.
As for the PCOS, well... It's not a faillure to take metformin. If you need it to get it licked, take it. There's no shame in needing medication. My thyroid's busted, should I feel shame for supplementing the hormones so I can breathe, and don't get cancer? Would you tell anyone here who needs metformin to tackle something, that they should go sit in a corner and contemplate their sins? I doubt it.
Be gentle with yourself and stock up on cheese and pork scratchings.
*HUGS*
Jo