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Mother-in-law's Manners Guide.

  • Thread starter Thread starter catherinecherub
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catherinecherub

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A bride to be, who has diabetes, has been given a very public etiquette lesson after an email from her future mother-in-law, attacking her uncouthness went viral on the internet. :roll: :roll:


http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-New ... 1513?f=rss

The advice concerning the girl's diabetes starts off, "It is tragic that you have diabetes. However............"
 
Have you seen the whole email? It's insane! It's either 100% true or an amazing PR stunt!

It is high time someone explained to you about good manners. Yours are obvious by their absence and I feel sorry for you.
Unfortunately for Freddie, he has fallen in love with you and Freddie being Freddie, I gather it is not easy to reason with him or yet encourage him to consider how he might be able to help you.
It may just be possible to get through to you though. I do hope so.
Your behaviour on your visit to Devon during April was staggering in its uncouthness and lack of grace.
Unfortunately, this was not the first example of bad manners I have experienced from you.
If you want to be accepted by the wider Bourne family I suggest you take some guidance from experts with utmost haste.
There are plenty of finishing schools around. You would be an ideal candidate for the Ladette to Lady television series.
Please, for your own good, for Freddie's sake and for your future involvement with the Bourne family, do something as soon as possible.
Here are a few examples of your lack of manners:
When you are a guest in another's house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat - unless you are positively allergic to something.
You do not remark that you do not have enough food.
You do not start before everyone else.
You do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your host.
When a guest in another's house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early - you fall in line with house norms.
You should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughter.
I have no idea whether you wrote to thank [your future sister-in-law] for the weekend but you should have hand-written a card to her.
You should have hand-written a card to me. You have never written to thank me when you have stayed at Houndspool.
[Your future sister-in-law] has quite the most exquisite manners of anyone I have ever come across. You would do well to follow her example.
You regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself why.
It is tragic that you have diabetes. However, you aren't the only young person in the world who is a diabetic.
I know quite a few young people who have this condition, one of whom is getting married in June. I have never heard her discuss her condition.
She quietly gets on with it. She doesn't like being diabetic. Who would? You do not need to regale everyone with the details of your condition or use it as an excuse to draw attention to yourself. It is vulgar.
As a diabetic of long standing you must be acutely aware of the need to prepare yourself for extraordinary eventualities, the walk to Mothecombe beach being an example.
You are experienced enough to have prepared yourself appropriately.
No-one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity style behaviour.
I understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters' marriages.)
If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes.
One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddie.
 
I would be very surprised if a lady with such an old-fashioned attitude to manners and etiquette actually sent this by email! She would be much more likely to have written a letter.

I'd like to have been a fly on the wall that weekend.

Viv 8)
 
Do I believe the validity of this email ?.........not a chance and it's more likely a publicity stunt to draw attention to themselves! :)

Nigel
 
I heard this being debated on radio 2 Jeremy Vine this afternoon..and some of the callers responses!!!!

I found it totally amusing....as people should remember that written words of any sort can never be taken back when sent by email or post......

Reminded me of my brother and his wife who have sent some disgusting letters to my mum and stepdad over the years........why can't people say things...why do people who can have face to face chats resort to emails.....if it is true of course....
 
They'll all be on Jeremy Kyle next week fighting! :lol:

Nigel
 
noblehead said:
They'll all be on Jeremy Kyle next week fighting! :lol:

Nigel


Now that would be funny "Sit down, shut up and listen, this is my show and I'm talking now"
rolmao.gif



My advice to this young lady would be drop him like a hot stone and run, very fast as far away from him and his step mother as is humanly possible, she will make the MIL from hell.
 
This mother-in-law is an absolute DONUT. I've found that the type of people with these types of beliefs (and put such high regard on such things as etiquette) have very little else that they have any kind of knowledge of.

Thank god they're a dying breed. Embarassment does great things to stupid people.

I get on really well with my potential futur MIL (you know me - I get on with everyone...), BUT - I'm sure I could NOT hold back if she ever spoke to me in the way this woman has spoke to Heidi.

(P.S - I'm sure Heidi's website isn't complaining... :twisted:)
 
I hate to say this, but at face value I agree with some of what the future MIL said.

If you go to visit someone, and stay, it's only courteous to fit in with what the host household considers as normal. If you want to stay in bed until noon, say so the evening before! Appearing at 11:30 demanding breakfast is not considerate.

You say thank-you after a visit - maybe not a hand-written note, these days, but certainly a phone call.

If you have any diet issues, you can raise them before the visit ever takes place - equally, the hostess should ask you! never mind the diabetes, many people are vegetarian or have wheat intolerance, allergies, etc.

Looking at that email , I certainly would not be marrying her stepson; but who's to say we've seen the whole email? It's possible for the recipient to edit it before forwarding on the a 'friend'.

We've only got one side of the story here, if indeed it is true. I'd like to hear the rest.

Future DIL has now got a great excuse to break her engagement. Future MIL has had great publicity for her nursery garden. Is anyone going to get a tabloid payout? I don't get Sunday papers - let me know, someone.

Anyone fancy going into partnership over something similar? We could concoct a great story-line!

Viv 8)
 
She is not really the future M-I-L as she is the young man's step mother.

His biological mother has stepped in to answer how she feels about her future daughter in law.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/family/86113 ... n-law.html

I think mother's should take a step back when their offspring have girl/boyfriends. We all want the best for our children but we cannot dictate who they fall in love with even if we don't approve. Putting their respective partner down works against parents and makes them more determined in their choice.
 
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