Struggling, why am I doing this?

Grant_Vicat

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,176
Type of diabetes
Don't have diabetes
Treatment type
I do not have diabetes
Dislikes
Intolerance, selfishness, rice pudding
Thanks for being so understanding and supportive, everyone. I'm not usually a moaner. I think this is worse because of Covid and lockdown happening at the same time. Sometimes that's a plus in that I've had plenty of time to learn and research and my access to food is limited. But now the new normal beckons and it's a diabetic normal.
It also gets galling shopping for the 85 year old who doesnt care he has type 2. Our 2 shopping lists couldn't be more different.

I'm trying to up my salts, but my BP is 'perfect' according to the surgery nurse.

I will try eating to hunger and my monitor and ignoring macros and what others do.
Its quite tough when one is the cook and provisioner for an otherwise metabolocally normal family. It's difficult enough producing meals 3x 3 x7 a week. They used to be out at work for at least 10 meals a week, and I could eat or not as I liked . Now its expected to sit at the table 3 times a day. I miss baking and the wider range of cooking.

I suppose part of it is that I dont have/see any benefits from being so restrictive, nor do I see any symptoms if I eat the wrong things. Yes the monitor helps but I was symptomless on diagnosis. I only went for the test because my sister getting it put me in a higher risk group. She has a lot to be blamed for!!!
Hi @MrsA2 I remember reading recently a report that said if you are on a low carb diet, your kidneys can deal with excess salt, provided that they are not already damaged. With a 'perfect' reading it doesn't sound like you have a problem. The reason doctors are so concerned with blood pressure in a diabetic is that if it is raised, that usually is a sign of kidneys struggling to regulate levels of glucose, calcium, potassium, phosphates and salt. If you are not eating much carbohydrate, upping the salt, if that is what is required, shouldn't be a problem. A blood pressure test will let you know!
 
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MrsA2

Expert
Messages
5,575
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
Not only that but just because their routine has been forced to change they should not expect you to compromise your health to suit their wishes. They can still fix themselves breakfast and lunch without you having to do it for them. Nor should you have to join them at the table no matter who has cooked if you don’t want to eat that meal. I appreciate all families have their own dynamics but they need to be supporting your health decisions.
They are supportive and do much. I think I'm just down and missing my independence somewhat.
 

HSSS

Expert
Messages
7,465
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
They are supportive and do much. I think I'm just down and missing my independence somewhat.
Yep. I miss having the house to myself sometimes and feel that so many extra meals were a major pain. However I now have them all doing their own breakfast and lunch and helping with dinner sometimes. And even better no packed lunches need to be made
 

MrsA2

Expert
Messages
5,575
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
Yep. I miss having the house to myself sometimes and feel that so many extra meals were a major pain. However I now have them all doing their own breakfast and lunch and helping with dinner sometimes. And even better no packed lunches need to be made
Yes it's ironic that just when I need to reduce food that there are extra mouths and meals. Food has been so central and we have far too much in the fridges. Hubby insists on coming shopping and buys everything everytime. I keep telling him we dont need so much but he feels he is contributing and helping. It's hard to disillusion him... like kicking puppy (blush)
 

Bex72

Well-Known Member
Messages
191
Type of diabetes
LADA
Treatment type
Insulin
Dislikes
government policies that increase inequality, brussel sprouts, neighbour's karaoke at 2am
I'm finding this diabetes malarkey a bit much. I have gone very low carb and it's mostly ok but I'm getting envious of others. My sugars aren't coming down far or fast enough.
During lockdown I've been doing the shopping for a pair of 85 year olds, one of whom was diagnosed type 2 a good few years ago but what they buy is very wrong, bread, tea cakes, rice pudding, baked beans, jam, cereals, corner yoghurts, week in week out. He ignores the advice and is only tested infrequently, doesn't seem to have any complications, or any guilt.
My sister was diagnosed at xmas but only started taking action few months ago. She has cut her doughnuts down to once a week! Yet her hba1c has fallen by the same as mine even though I am being much stricter. I am also younger, slimmer and fitter yet her results are the same as mine.
It's not fair.
I keep going in circles trying to lose weight and keep sugars down but not seeing much effect either way.
I swing between thinking I'm eating too much because of the fats and lack of weight loss to thinking I'm not eating enough because I get dizzy and light headed. I've got funny skin sensation and lots of headaches.
I'm dreading lockdown releasing as that will just show I have no will power. I dont want to be restricted in restaurant choices, but I dont want to lose a foot either. Some days I think my carb cravings have gone, then I get a smell of soemthing and I know I'd be right back on it if there was any in reach.
The fun of eating fat is wearing off, it just feels greasy now. I'd love a proper pudding, yet I'm thinking I need to fast more and for longer.
I think I can stop testing regularly but as soon as I stop testing I worry that my sugars and weight will go up
I'm scared to try other foods. I'd like to add more range but am frightened to try in case it just shows I'm going to be limited for life.
I keep oscillating between aiming to get sugars right down then relaxing a bit and getting fed up waiting and relaxing a bit now. I want to believe the gp that I dont need another test for year, but I dont trust myself to stop testing. I want to be in control but I don't want to have to be in control.

This is all so muddled, but my thoughts swing from one extreme to the other all the time

Example: I just tested after a meal to which I added 4 small grapes. I also ate teaspoon of couscous while cooking to taste it for others. Yet those 2 new things sent me up 3 (from 6 to 9). I know my levels aren't bad compared to some, but why me??? Why cant my life be simple? What have I done to deserve this, and for the rest of my life too?

This sounds such a moan but it is really getting to me. Any tips any one?
I feel your pain. Little in life is fair really. You aren't alone. I've been having similar thoughts. I have really blurry vision still and am fed up. I am controlling with diet and have been lucky that my BG came down to a good level quickly. However, if I eat or drink the wrong thing it will shoot back up. I'm only two weeks into this journey and still have a lot to learn. Thank goodness for this forum.
 
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Alexandra100

Well-Known Member
Messages
3,738
Type of diabetes
Prediabetes
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
By the way, this month is my diaversary. I plan to celebrate it at an all-you-can-eat grill restaurant: all meat, all over the place. There are still spots where you can go nuts.
Wow, this speaks to me! Glucose intolerance forced me to give up my preferred Mediterranean / semi-vegetarian diet. Part of me still strongly dislikes the idea of eating cows and pigs, but another part of me longs to eat a huge steak, perhaps with bacon on the side. Every time I pass a steak house I dream about it. Maybe post Covid I'll actually do it once a year. I bet the reality will be disappointing and set me up for another year eating wild caught fish, free range chicken and eggs.
 

Alexandra100

Well-Known Member
Messages
3,738
Type of diabetes
Prediabetes
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
I just tested after a meal to which I added 4 small grapes. I also ate teaspoon of couscous while cooking to taste it for others. Yet those 2 new things sent me up 3 (from 6 to 9)
Believe me, I do share your outrage! I eat VLC and am under rather than over-weight, but my bg doesn't seem to care. I see that others began with far higher A1cs than me and with weight to lose, and yet now are rightly proud of their far lower numbers. I don't follow the forums where people share what they have eaten, because I know many will have enjoyed far more carbs than I could allow myself and yet are doing far better than me.

But then, a non-diabetic friend has just developed cancer. She has had her bladder taken out and an external bag fitted. Would I swap with her? No!!!

Grapes are some of the most high carb fruits. Do you like raspberries, strawberries, blackberries? Any of those could be a fruity treat (especially with double cream) but would almost certainly not raise your bg so much. You can buy frozen packs of mixed berries and just take out a few when temptation hits. Mixed with cream and/or low carb Greek yoghurt berries ooze a delicious syrup. Eaten slowly and mindfully with a teaspoon this can be much more satisfying than casually eating stuff while standing and cooking.

Forgive me if you already know all this, but if not you might find Diet Doctor helpful:
https://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb/fruits
 

Alexandra100

Well-Known Member
Messages
3,738
Type of diabetes
Prediabetes
Treatment type
Tablets (oral)
Yes it's ironic that just when I need to reduce food that there are extra mouths and meals. Food has been so central and we have far too much in the fridges. Hubby insists on coming shopping and buys everything everytime. I keep telling him we dont need so much but he feels he is contributing and helping. It's hard to disillusion him... like kicking puppy (blush)
@MrsA2, since your hubby / puppy is so nice and really wants to help, could you sit him down at a tactfully chosen time and say you really need his help and what that help would be? Spell it out and show how you trust his good will and intelligence? Going along with a pretence that he is helping when really he is harming is a highway to nowhere.
 

MrsA2

Expert
Messages
5,575
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
@MrsA2, since your hubby / puppy is so nice and really wants to help, could you sit him down at a tactfully chosen time and say you really need his help and what that help would be? Spell it out and show how you trust his good will and intelligence? Going along with a pretence that he is helping when really he is harming is a highway to nowhere.
My original post was over six weeks ago, and like everything else to do with diabetes, it has been an up and down roller coaster of good times and bad times since. Hubby is learning.....slowly, but it is progress.
Any 'bad' fruit is now kept out of sight so I can't pick mindlessly. I had a chocolate craving today but resisited as none of the local shops had anything sufficiently dark and high % to interest me
 

SlimLizzy

Well-Known Member
Messages
3,212
Type of diabetes
Prediabetes
Treatment type
Diet only
Dislikes
football, both the game and the culture.
Believe me, I do share your outrage! I eat VLC and am under rather than over-weight, but my bg doesn't seem to care. I see that others began with far higher A1cs than me and with weight to lose, and yet now are rightly proud of their far lower numbers. I don't follow the forums where people share what they have eaten, because I know many will have enjoyed far more carbs than I could allow myself and yet are doing far better than me.

But then, a non-diabetic friend has just developed cancer. She has had her bladder taken out and an external bag fitted. Would I swap with her? No!!!

Grapes are some of the most high carb fruits. Do you like raspberries, strawberries, blackberries? Any of those could be a fruity treat (especially with double cream) but would almost certainly not raise your bg so much. You can buy frozen packs of mixed berries and just take out a few when temptation hits. Mixed with cream and/or low carb Greek yoghurt berries ooze a delicious syrup. Eaten slowly and mindfully with a teaspoon this can be much more satisfying than casually eating stuff while standing and cooking.

Forgive me if you already know all this, but if not you might find Diet Doctor helpful:
https://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb/fruits
If you go for the Greek yoghurt, look for full fat, (will be about 9%) low fat will definitely have more carbs.
 

Buzzer81

Well-Known Member
Messages
160
Have a hug.

firstly, you don’t have to eat fat if you find it unappetising and greasy. Just eat to your appetite and stop when you don’t. Please don’t fall for the you MUST inhale fat, because that simply isn’t true.

if you want to get it down to the simplest level, then eat ‘normal’ protein, low carb, and enough fat to satisfy. Let your meter guide you. That gives you a huge scope of veg and salads and sauces and dressings. After I clamped down and went v low carb, I got sooo bored. I think it was a sign that I was resenting the change and feeling hard done by. I am such a sucker for New and Exciting and NOT the same every day. I mean, nowadays I need to be carnivore. That is pretty restrictive. I have to shake it up every now and then. Just for variety. I could never eat steak twice a day, every day, so I have curries and pickled herring and cheeses and roasts and stews and soups and scrambled egg with smoked salmon and cheesy mince and Moo Grob and endlessly varied ribs, duck, chicken, turkey, beef, pork, lamb, goat, heart, liver, kidney, salmon, herring, bassa, cod, kippers, sole, prawns, butter and garlic, herbs, spices (and chocolate ;) ). The variety is much greater than you might think. If I had veg in there too, The only limit would be my imagination and howmuch effort I would put into cooking.

Have you discovered low carb mug cakes? They make up for a heck of a lot of carby donuts.

it is INCREDIBLY hard to stop judging people for eating stuff that you can’t. It may be impossible. It is frustrating to see them tucking into stuff that would send your bg into the stratosphere. But... what works for them clearly doesn’t work for you. Your body is different. Your metabolism is different. You need to find a way that works for you.

What is Cheesy Mince?!?!
 

TriciaWs

Well-Known Member
Messages
1,727
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Other
Unfortunately our bodies are all different, so some will be able to get their blood sugars under control by just cutting out a few things and others will struggle on a far stricter diet.

My example of how not to do it is my mother, who carried on eating junk full of sugar. In spite of her GP increasing her metformin to the point she had serious diarrhea every day. And in spite of her eyesight damage, so bad at the end she could barely read, and restless legs, and peripheral neuropathy.
I plan in advance to keep a few low carb extras for the tough days, and plan in advance what I can eat when out. If everyone else will be eating cake I know I have low carb cake at home, so I can watch them and have mine later.

So one thing I knew I had to cater for was my sweet tooth - low carb did not get rid of it so rather then be endlessly tempted I allow for low carb sweet treats - greek yogurt with raspberries most days, or occasional no added sugar almond/coconut flour cake (stored in the freezer ready sliced), plus a little 85% dark chocolate. Some days I have a sugar free jelly with the yogurt. I also make 'crumble' with ground almonds lightly pressed over a bowl of rhubarb and baked on a medium heat - lovely with cream or a real egg custard.
And if I have lunch (I often don't) I make 90sec almond bread which is great if split, then lightly toasted served with cheese or so homemade no added sugar marmalade.
 
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Buzzer81

Well-Known Member
Messages
160
Wow, I feel like I’ve been living in the shadows my whole life!!!! This is such an epic idea, I cannot wait time try it!!!!! Thank you for that tip!!!!