Type 1 and anger

[Robinredbreast]

I guess I'm pretty laid back and don't find diabetes makes me angry even when my BG is misbehaving in either direction. Although, lack of patience is sometimes an indication my BG is getting low.

I am probably weird but I see diabetes as something which I can do nothing about so, with my logical, engineering brain, I don't see anything to get angry about. My diabetes emotions tend to be around the diagnosis: I am happy/grateful that I was diagnosed because I would not be here otherwise. ... It's the happy/grateful bit that probably makes me weird.

It tends to be people that make me angry. It's usually their laziness or negative defeatist attitude that frustrate me. I am not talking about people with or talking about diabetes ... I mean all people.

Like @kev-w I find exercise calms me down - something about giving an outlet for the anger.
Along the same lines, I also find bread making therapeutic - as well as creating something at the end of it, I sometimes picture the face of someone particularly annoying in the dough as I vigorously knead it.

Having a nice long walk for me, helps to unscramble the head and the thoughts, plus exercise, all good.

 

[Robinredbreast]

No it isn't. It's just "advice" from people who will say literally anything to make themselves feel better, no matter how unconvincing or just stupid. If they actually MENTIONED those caveats it might mean something but they don't. This is just a bunch of people trying to persuade themselves that something is lovely when it isn't. Sorry but I can't maintain that sort of cognitive dissonance. Nothing makes me angry about this more than YOU GUYS.

Many people say things to help other's, but, not for their own gratification, it's called kindness and empathy. Your post is truly a sad, poor me, soul destroying one.

 

[Robinredbreast]

Couldn't you get an insulin pen with a smilie face on?

Sorry, sarcasm being the lowest form of wit and all that jazz... But no, I'd say it's a bunch of people trying to make the best of what they've got, and it's not so much the saying of things to make ourselves feel better, but the DOING of things to achieve that.

Look at it another way, if this was a 100 years ago you'd be dead, same as each and every t1 on this board so it could be worse, a whole lot worse in fact.

Compromise is a tool you've yet to find.

People have to open their minds to find it though, but not in this case I'm afraid

 

[Fairygodmother]

How are you doing today @mountaintom? My pred text wanted you to be mountaintop - hope it’s truly predictive and you’re feeling on top of the world. Like many of yours, this thread’s really taken off - does it help?

 

[Circuspony]

Careful you're not allowed to say that round here, only a permanent attitude of forced happiness is allowable.

It can feel a bit like that at times! I think I am more resigned to T1D than I am angry about it. I feel fortunate that it happened late in life because I do think it would have stopped me doing some of the things I have done with my life. Positive mental attitude might get you a long way, but if I'd had T1D in the middle of the Namib desert with sunstroke it would likely have been life threatening (although I doubt I would have got the insurance to do that particular trip) rather than just making me as poorly as I was at the time. I get the anger Susie feels at having her freedom curtailed by this disease. No, there is nothing we can do but accept it and get on with life but that doesn't mean you can't feel a bit p'd off that its happened.

Other people's attitudes are frustrating and I can see how that could build up into anger. The novelty of me 'being ill' has definitely worn off from friends and family but unfortunately I'm stuck with it.

 

[mountaintom]

How are you doing today @mountaintom? My pred text wanted you to be mountaintop - hope it’s truly predictive and you’re feeling on top of the world. Like many of yours, this thread’s really taken off - does it help?

Thanks for asking! I’m fine today! No outbursts.
Researching neuropathy as I’ve had tingling fingers on my left hand and upper arm for a few days.
My outbursts are probably more related to me not having a beer for 4 months and saying goodbye to the old me in more ways than one.

 

[Fairygodmother]

Yup, the first few months are often hard. Hope your tingling’s ‘just’ a trapped nerve.

 

[Engineer88]

Why is it only adult onset that can be angry?

I find the anger is cyclic

 

[JoeT1]

No it isn't. It's just "advice" from people who will say literally anything to make themselves feel better, no matter how unconvincing or just stupid. If they actually MENTIONED those caveats it might mean something but they don't. This is just a bunch of people trying to persuade themselves that something is lovely when it isn't. Sorry but I can't maintain that sort of cognitive dissonance. Nothing makes me angry about this more than YOU GUYS.

You're right. What's the point? There is no point, surely. I should stop getting out and getting my 15,000 steps minimum a day, I should stop lifting weights, I should stop looking after myself. It's pointless, i'm clearly just brainwashed and fooling myself into thinking I have felt better since diagnosis, ****, there was me thinking I was actually feeling ok.

Even if I am, I can't be healthy, can I? No, ****, everybody else is stupid, they are all brainwashed also. That woman I met in the hospital who had T1 for 63 years and full of life? She's a fraud, surely.

It's going to get me in the end isn't it? There is no way I could possibly prevent all the horrible things? You're right, i'll give up, that's the logical solution.

 

[NicoleC1971]

I don't get angry as much as I get depressed but I gather that can be the flip side of the coin. The anger is internally directed but comes from some kind of guilt that there is always something those of us without a working pancreas could be doing better (testing more, counting carbs more or not feel negative about our condition). How we all deal with those feelings are as diverse as the kind of personalities who get diabetes but I think anger could be a positive response as long as you use it to do something that moves you on e.g. hitting a punch bag in the gym gets you fitter (positive) whereas being compulsively negative for the sake of it may not be helping. Is it helping?

 

[therower]

This is just a bunch of people trying to persuade themselves that something is lovely when it isn't. Sorry but I can't maintain that sort of cognitive dissonance. Nothing makes me angry about this more than YOU GUYS.

Solution........GOODBYE.
Diabetes.....no choice.
This forum........your choice.

 

[leahkian]

You can get angry when your sugar is low but you can also angry if you are having a bad day. Everyone deals with diabetes and anger in different ways, some people get angry about doing BS or injecting. Diabetes is something that effects your life everyday but it is how you as a person deal with it, since i had a double transplant 3 years ago my anger has got worse not because of the transplant but what the diabetes had done over the years i had it. I know i cannot do things that i could do before but i had to have it to see my children grow up. Being a diabetic you mood can be great one day and the next you are on the bottom, your mind works overtime thinking if i only did not have diabetes and people act different it could be your mental health or you think there is know point in carrying on.

 

[leahkian]

Careful you're not allowed to say that round here, only a permanent attitude of forced happiness is allowable.

Susie this is a forum where people share their feeling some are good and some are bad but everyone is able to express themselves. I know you hate diabetes and feel your life is over and i am not going to tell you that you are wrong because i know that diabetes will kill me in the end or something to do with it will, did i enjoy having diabetes when i was 10 no, when i was 20 no, 30 no and i will never like it. I hate seeing little children with diabetes as i know even with the progress they made with research that life will be hard for them as i know life is hard for you. I am already on with my second pancreas and third kidney and i only got them because a 23 year old man died and i got his organs, who do i hate for this diabetes and myself. Why myself because i have to live with the thought of someones son, brother, sister, husband or even father died for me to live. I sent a letter 10 months after the transplant it was the hardest thing i have ever done it took me 2 weeks to do it as i kept breaking down in tears, what can you say that will make up for there loss. Since the 17th of April 2015 i have lived with the guilt, anger and frustration, yes i do not have injections anymore but i would take injecting again if that lad could live. All i what to do is see my children grow up in the past 6 years they have gone through more things than most kids go through. They came to live with me when i seperated then their mother moved away, they were in tears when i went to hospital for my transplant both of us knowing that this might be the last time we saw each other and the many times i have had to come and see me in hospital. Yes i hate diabetes because of all the people that it effects, so i know you cannot be happy all the time. Even though i am not a diabetic at the minute my life is still being effected by diabetes that sometimes i want to scream, the 17th of April is my sons birthday and he will never forget his tenth birthday

 

[Broomthebeast]

For me, when I am really angry I do kickboxing alone in my living-room (with a video). Nothing better than picturing the stuff (or people!) that make me angry and hitting!

 

[isjoberg]

@mountaintom i'm not adult onset, have been diabetic for over 20 years, but I do find when I have periods of worse control (neverending rollercoaster....) I struggle to keep my emotions in check when angry (and can really overwhelmed which used to result in me doing stupid things but now is more about me removing myself from a situation). However this also happens sometimes when I'm doing well with control. I mean maybe it is a diabetic thing having outbursts, I wouldn't know because I was only 18 months when diagnosed! But ye you're not the only one.

 

[rochari]

When my sugar level is low I know I am a nightmare to those around me. I get angry, impatient and will argue with anyone and usually everyone. Like many diabetics I am not even aware of it and the first sign is somebody telling me to test my blood. I'm told I always say no and that I am OK which keeps the argument going!

Bill

 

[Robinredbreast]

When my sugar level is low I know I am a nightmare to those around me. I get angry, impatient and will argue with anyone and usually everyone. Like many diabetics I am not even aware of it and the first sign is somebody telling me to test my blood. I'm told I always say no and that I am OK which keeps the argument going!

Bill

I can feel angry, but often I am more stroppy and think the person or persons are ganging up on me, feels like like an old teenager syndrome, also weepy. But my teenager is spot on by just looking at me, she knows a hypo and takes control and is certainly in charge, bless her <3

 

[mountaintom]

Susie this is a forum where people share their feeling some are good and some are bad but everyone is able to express themselves. I know you hate diabetes and feel your life is over and i am not going to tell you that you are wrong because i know that diabetes will kill me in the end or something to do with it will, did i enjoy having diabetes when i was 10 no, when i was 20 no, 30 no and i will never like it. I hate seeing little children with diabetes as i know even with the progress they made with research that life will be hard for them as i know life is hard for you. I am already on with my second pancreas and third kidney and i only got them because a 23 year old man died and i got his organs, who do i hate for this diabetes and myself. Why myself because i have to live with the thought of someones son, brother, sister, husband or even father died for me to live. I sent a letter 10 months after the transplant it was the hardest thing i have ever done it took me 2 weeks to do it as i kept breaking down in tears, what can you say that will make up for there loss. Since the 17th of April 2015 i have lived with the guilt, anger and frustration, yes i do not have injections anymore but i would take injecting again if that lad could live. All i what to do is see my children grow up in the past 6 years they have gone through more things than most kids go through. They came to live with me when i seperated then their mother moved away, they were in tears when i went to hospital for my transplant both of us knowing that this might be the last time we saw each other and the many times i have had to come and see me in hospital. Yes i hate diabetes because of all the people that it effects, so i know you cannot be happy all the time. Even though i am not a diabetic at the minute my life is still being effected by diabetes that sometimes i want to scream, the 17th of April is my sons birthday and he will never forget his tenth birthday

Whoa that’s some story. God bless you all!

 

[db89]

4.9 sends me into a rage I've rediscovered this morning.

 

[rochari]

I can feel angry, but often I am more stroppy and think the person or persons are ganging up on me, feels like like an old teenager syndrome, also weepy. But my teenager is spot on by just looking at me, she knows a hypo and takes control and is certainly in charge, bless her <3

Exactly! Thanks Robinredbreast, you described it better than I could. I'm retired now but I remember years ago getting into an argument with a customer on the phone and I would not back down. It was terrible customer service but I could not let it go. I remember my boss slowly coming over, gently take the handset from my hand and introduced herself to the now irate customer. She turned the call around, thank god as another colleague dived into a drawer in my desk where the emergency stuff was and wouldn't move until I drank the can of Coke. God bless them because I was so stroppy with them both but as far as I was concerned I was OK, not realising I wasn't and they were only trying to help.

Bill