Hi,
I'm a Type 1 diabetic first diagnosed when I was 7 years old, so basically have and will have (if and until they make a cure) it for the majority of my life. I don't know if I can help at all but I'm 19 going on 20 and about to go into my second year of University. And my sugars before this past one-two weeks had been in the teens and 20s, too high for my health, and already in the past year I've been feeling the horrid effects of it such as getting blurry vision for a few days (and I mean so much so that I'd started to struggle to read sign posts), mood swings (I've had a lot of depression-based moments, absolutely horrid), always thirsty and tired, then other female related conditions that I'm a little too shy to admit on a forum but you get the idea.
The point is, for so long I've been and still do feel like you do, or how it sounds from what I've read, the days where I want complete freedom to eat and drink what I want and not feel guilty about having a high blood sugar, fed up of pricking my fingers and injecting into my skin which can cause bruises and bumps that don't go away. And the worst bit was that I didn't have anyone close enough who was going through the same thing, even the doctors kept messing up my insulin orders and made me so frustrated I actually broke down in tears one day when I went in to try and explain just how important that I get the medicine otherwise all of the above that I mentioned would keep happening. I didn't even realise things like stress could effect my sugars until I joined the Diabetes Facebook page. And the reason I joined was because I felt like you, like I just couldn't take control.
I'm sorry for the waffling but if you or anyone else wanted to chat or become diabetic buddies or something, I'd be happy to try and help and relate. I've said a lot about myself because I thought perhaps you'd like to know a similar but also different perspective on the matter?
I've made a new resolve to face my diabetes and focus on controlling the sugar levels, and now that I have a lot of the bigger problems have gone away. The emotional part is one of the hardest, because even your family can struggle to understand, and after dating my boyfriend for nearly 2 years I still have to explain things to his family. The annoying part is when strangers come up to you and say ignorant things such as my boss when I first told him about my condition "Well a healthy looking girl like you doesn't look overweight or like you eat much". The truth is I actually LOVE food and eat a lot, but that I got diabetes genetically and through a distant cousin, not because of a bad diet or my weight. So I bit the bullet and explained the difference.
I fully support you and really do hope things improve from now on, keep an eye out for other diabetics online like on this forum, I think that the age variety and experiences really helpful and inspiring to motivate me to take care of myself. Learning to love yourself will help you to love those around you even more <3 xx