Molly56
Well-Known Member
- Messages
- 3,844
- Type of diabetes
- Don't have diabetes
- Treatment type
- I do not have diabetes
@andreaabbott1 @copey399 ...I can relate to both of your stories being a partner of a Type 2 diabetic who was in denial about his diabetes...and to some extent still is...
I don't know the answers as to how to solve your individual problems but can only relate what has happened in my circumstance and say there is still hope and that people can change.
To start with it is important to share the problem with others (for your own sanity as much as anything) and listen to their advice...i have had lots of advice from people here on the forum and it has really helped....not all of the advice has been appropriate to me or my partner but you just need to sort out what is best for you....only you know your own personal circumstances and what will work and what won't...
Since I have been here on the forum things have definitely improved with my partner (even though my occasional postings and rants may not make it look that way)....thinking back a few years (when we first met) he would spend every night in the pub drinking and not taking any notice at all of what he ate or his medication....since getting together he has made changes and now no longer drinks any alcohol....he went through a phase of drinking six to eight cans of diet fizzy drinks a day but has now ditched that habit and now only drinks bottled water and a daily cup of coffee...
....as far as eating was concerned he was very much in the same boat ...eating what he wanted and not thinking about the consequences....a packet of sweets would be consumed without a second thought and no account was taken of what was healthy and what was not...now it is different ...he will look at the amount of carbs in food (my consistent and sometimes not very subtle hints eventually worked and the penny dropped)...and now has chosen to eat salads for tea..he doesn't eat potatoes anymore (his choice) and where he used to eat four or five slices of bread as a late night snack this is no longer on the menu.....he has the minor relapses I know with the occasional tiger roll or two appearing on the shopping receipt but I overlook this...
The important thing is that he has changed but that he had to make that change when he was ready to do so...
Saying all of that it is not all perfect....as one of you mentioned he does seem to spend the majority of his time in bed ...but I have had to accept that that is the way he is and only he can decide that is not a good thing and decide to do something else...I hope one day that he does but no amount of me telling him is going to change that....I too point out articles in newspapers etc about inactivity and how this is detrimental to health...but he will only take in what he wants to take in...
My concerns now are over the worrying signs of diabetic complications such as the neuropathy in his feet and hands ...especially where this is making simple daily tasks problematic....have told him he needs to sort it out because I'm not doing it......other signs of problems such as those mentioned by yourselves are also evident...
If I have any advice I would say try to speak to either your GP or your diabetic team about your own concerns...particularly as it also affects you in terms of your own health and wellbeing...I always think it is difficult to cope with this situation as you are the only one that knows exactly what is going on behind closed doors...the professionals are there to help but they need to know that help is needed...concentrate on your own wellbeing first and foremost...thankfully my GP will listen and can make appropriate suggestions to help when needed.
I hope you both manage to find the right answers for yourselves and can perhaps manage to find valuable support for each other here on this forum.
I don't know the answers as to how to solve your individual problems but can only relate what has happened in my circumstance and say there is still hope and that people can change.
To start with it is important to share the problem with others (for your own sanity as much as anything) and listen to their advice...i have had lots of advice from people here on the forum and it has really helped....not all of the advice has been appropriate to me or my partner but you just need to sort out what is best for you....only you know your own personal circumstances and what will work and what won't...
Since I have been here on the forum things have definitely improved with my partner (even though my occasional postings and rants may not make it look that way)....thinking back a few years (when we first met) he would spend every night in the pub drinking and not taking any notice at all of what he ate or his medication....since getting together he has made changes and now no longer drinks any alcohol....he went through a phase of drinking six to eight cans of diet fizzy drinks a day but has now ditched that habit and now only drinks bottled water and a daily cup of coffee...
....as far as eating was concerned he was very much in the same boat ...eating what he wanted and not thinking about the consequences....a packet of sweets would be consumed without a second thought and no account was taken of what was healthy and what was not...now it is different ...he will look at the amount of carbs in food (my consistent and sometimes not very subtle hints eventually worked and the penny dropped)...and now has chosen to eat salads for tea..he doesn't eat potatoes anymore (his choice) and where he used to eat four or five slices of bread as a late night snack this is no longer on the menu.....he has the minor relapses I know with the occasional tiger roll or two appearing on the shopping receipt but I overlook this...
The important thing is that he has changed but that he had to make that change when he was ready to do so...
Saying all of that it is not all perfect....as one of you mentioned he does seem to spend the majority of his time in bed ...but I have had to accept that that is the way he is and only he can decide that is not a good thing and decide to do something else...I hope one day that he does but no amount of me telling him is going to change that....I too point out articles in newspapers etc about inactivity and how this is detrimental to health...but he will only take in what he wants to take in...
My concerns now are over the worrying signs of diabetic complications such as the neuropathy in his feet and hands ...especially where this is making simple daily tasks problematic....have told him he needs to sort it out because I'm not doing it......other signs of problems such as those mentioned by yourselves are also evident...
If I have any advice I would say try to speak to either your GP or your diabetic team about your own concerns...particularly as it also affects you in terms of your own health and wellbeing...I always think it is difficult to cope with this situation as you are the only one that knows exactly what is going on behind closed doors...the professionals are there to help but they need to know that help is needed...concentrate on your own wellbeing first and foremost...thankfully my GP will listen and can make appropriate suggestions to help when needed.
I hope you both manage to find the right answers for yourselves and can perhaps manage to find valuable support for each other here on this forum.