Celibate for life....IS IT POSSIBLE?
- Thread starter jonniey
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Many girls told me I'm handsome.... yet all the ugly guys get the girls while I just stare and wish!!
.....and sleep alone every night
.....and sleep alone every night
If this is the extent of your problems, consider yourself extremely lucky.
Seems like without money, there's no possibility of getting a woman. So I'll just have to accept that I'll be alone forever.
Gezzabelle
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Hey Jonniey...stop being so hard on yourself. Instead of standing and staring at a distance try a little smile at some lady who takes your eye. You don't need money to get a woman....we aren't all gold diggers who demand a good time every night. We much prefer a kind, warm person who is there with a smile and some kind of optimism instead of all the negative thoughts you seem to have. Stop beating yourself up so much and get out there and mingle. You won't find anyone lurking in the background feeling sorry for yourself. Get out there and sparkle....show them what they have been missing 
hornplayer
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Your 4 year old self thought very deep thoughts 
There are some lovely encouraging replies on here for you. Money and "getting a woman" are not two things that are inextricably linked, as other poster have said. But I would like to point out, gently, and with respect, that women are not objects. They are not things to be acquired. You obviously talk to girls - the ones who tell you that you're handsome? Maybe you could work on establishing friendships first and see if something grows from there?
There are some lovely encouraging replies on here for you. Money and "getting a woman" are not two things that are inextricably linked, as other poster have said. But I would like to point out, gently, and with respect, that women are not objects. They are not things to be acquired. You obviously talk to girls - the ones who tell you that you're handsome? Maybe you could work on establishing friendships first and see if something grows from there?
Freema
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some time ones thoughts come true , especially if one manages to convince oneself of a lot of negative "facts" of how one is ...
it is quite the opposite of what elite sports people do, they meditate on their success and on purpose do picture for them selves how they win, imagine how it feels to win, imagine how it feels to do the effort they need to do..
If one is continuingly saying to oneself : I am a fiasko, I am a fiasko...then in the end the deeper parts of oneself ends up taking that as a fact and one behaves accordingly to that selv image..
It can be turned around, as it is a matter of self hypnosis and bad habits in ones self-Picture and identity, but then one must learn not to devaluate one self every second hour of the day and in what "essense" one present oneself to others as well...
your thoughts have much more power than you would think... especially if you think you are not the master of your own thoughts and self-picture/identity your self.
it is quite the opposite of what elite sports people do, they meditate on their success and on purpose do picture for them selves how they win, imagine how it feels to win, imagine how it feels to do the effort they need to do..
If one is continuingly saying to oneself : I am a fiasko, I am a fiasko...then in the end the deeper parts of oneself ends up taking that as a fact and one behaves accordingly to that selv image..
It can be turned around, as it is a matter of self hypnosis and bad habits in ones self-Picture and identity, but then one must learn not to devaluate one self every second hour of the day and in what "essense" one present oneself to others as well...
your thoughts have much more power than you would think... especially if you think you are not the master of your own thoughts and self-picture/identity your self.
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Cumberland
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Well iv actually given up for years now. im in my comfort zone......so I just never bother. I'm gonna die from diabetes anyway so I'll make piece that I'll be alone till death.
donnellysdogs
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People that can't listen to other people's opinions.
People that can't say sorry.
Ok from a womans point of view:
You dont have to be the best looking guy, or with money or health to be honest.
Why not go out and find some voluntary workina charity shop? You meet interesting people (dare I say mainly female?).
Why not try changing your attitude and helping yourself oht of this doom and gloom?
You do not have to have money to make friends or meet ladies...for example I helped set up a table tennis group in our community after moving to a totally new area and being completely housebound for 6 months. I did the paperwork and phonecalls to halls etc, placed adverts on free websites, wrote editorials... the chap needing help to set it up came to my bungalow. I have met so many people now it is unbelievable. I have real people in my life now that really make me laugh and they care about me. Male and females!!
You could offer help at any community voluntary event and meet people, become friends and gain confidence that you lack... and it doesnt cost money!!
I seriously think you need to talk to a GP and get some one to one counselling.
With so much negativity around every aspect of your posts I suspect (from a womans point of view) that abit more brightness, positivity and wanting to help yourself would be more attractive and alluring, enticing than being somebody that is so negative.
Why not join a free dating site?
I met my hubby 20 years sgo from an advert in a paper. He put in it "mongrel looking for a pedigree". I responded thinking he lime dogs!! 5 weeks later we married. He was very, very nervous of women... he was brought up a catholic and was 30 years old before I met him. His kindness and personality absolute shone through. He has never ever moaned or been negative ever.
I beg you to first talk to your GP. Get some one to one counselling and a brighter positive attitude and get some voluntary work.
You dont have to be the best looking guy, or with money or health to be honest.
Why not go out and find some voluntary workina charity shop? You meet interesting people (dare I say mainly female?).
Why not try changing your attitude and helping yourself oht of this doom and gloom?
You do not have to have money to make friends or meet ladies...for example I helped set up a table tennis group in our community after moving to a totally new area and being completely housebound for 6 months. I did the paperwork and phonecalls to halls etc, placed adverts on free websites, wrote editorials... the chap needing help to set it up came to my bungalow. I have met so many people now it is unbelievable. I have real people in my life now that really make me laugh and they care about me. Male and females!!
You could offer help at any community voluntary event and meet people, become friends and gain confidence that you lack... and it doesnt cost money!!
I seriously think you need to talk to a GP and get some one to one counselling.
With so much negativity around every aspect of your posts I suspect (from a womans point of view) that abit more brightness, positivity and wanting to help yourself would be more attractive and alluring, enticing than being somebody that is so negative.
Why not join a free dating site?
I met my hubby 20 years sgo from an advert in a paper. He put in it "mongrel looking for a pedigree". I responded thinking he lime dogs!! 5 weeks later we married. He was very, very nervous of women... he was brought up a catholic and was 30 years old before I met him. His kindness and personality absolute shone through. He has never ever moaned or been negative ever.
I beg you to first talk to your GP. Get some one to one counselling and a brighter positive attitude and get some voluntary work.
hornplayer
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And d'you know, being single doesn't need to be necessarily the end of the world. - If I want to sit around in my pyjamas, reading a book and ignoring the world once in a while, I can do it without anyone huffing at me. - And no sex really is better than BAD sex!!!
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And d'you know, being single doesn't need to be necessarily the end of the world. - If I want to sit around in my pyjamas, reading a book and ignoring the world once in a while, I can do it without anyone huffing at me. - And no sex really is better than BAD sex!!!
You're into the wrong genre of music...!
hornplayer
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Jaylee and I know each other from other threads on the forum. That's where the music reference came from. - Do you participate in other threads? That's a good way to get to know people and maybe help you break away from negativity? You say that Negativity is your comfort zone. Your reality. Maybe that could be something that's contributing to your inability to make a connection? It's fine to be comfortable in your negativity as long as you're equally as comfortable with your own company. It wouldn't be fair of you to ask someone to join you there, or to place the responsibility for your happiness solely on their shoulders. That isn't fair on them and it wouldn't be fair on you either in the long run.
Sorry if that sounds in anyway harsh, but you need to learn to live with and be happy with yourself before you can expect to form a decent relationship.
Sorry if that sounds in anyway harsh, but you need to learn to live with and be happy with yourself before you can expect to form a decent relationship.
Well I feel all hope In life is gone because of diabetes. I felt this way since I got diabetes almost 9 year's ago. It's hard to change the way I think.
. I felt this way since I got diabetes almost 9 year's ago. It's hard to change the way I think.
donnellysdogs
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People that can't listen to other people's opinions.
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May be hard but you got to try and persevere. If you continue in this frame of mind you are just wasting your life on misery. Just give something a go.
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Nothing whatsoever. It does however have something to do with respecting "someone" in your life to just chill out, comfortable with a book & create their own "headspace" without the demands of being a "supermodel" 24/7..
Or whatever "pedistool" you wish them awkwardly perched on....?Talking of music.... Ever thought of forming an "Emo" band? This is just the ticket!Negativity which is my realty, is my comfort zone!
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