I am so incredibly frightened

[Dianecz]

Hi, I am so incredibly frightened, my husband was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. I am 60, he is 70, we have been together 22 years and got married 2 months ago. I don't know what to do to help him, everything I read on what to eat and what not to eat and all the information is conflicting. I have mental health issues and my darling Colin suffers from depression. What can I do, I love this man with all my heart, and I will protect him ferociously. Is there a definitive list on how to manage this. I don't care what happens to me in this world, but not Colin, I need to protect him, he is such a good man, please help or reassure me that this can be managed, I will go to the ends of the earth from him. Thank you in anticipation,
Diane x

 

[KookieMunchster]

Hi Diane and welcome
Being here is a good start and you’re certainly with people who have first hand experience of it. Some of us do better and some not so but the collective knowledge here is going to help give you support. To help you , people will probably need to know a little more about you both. I really just wanted to write to assure you that you’re not alone and everyone here is quite helpful

 

[Guzzler]

Hello and welcome to the forum. Tagging @daisy1 for the info pack offered to all newcomers.

Steady now, lass. You can breathe, T2 can be managed, put into remission or reversed. There's quite a lot to get your head around but first things first. Get Colin a glucometer, @Rachox has loads of info on models. This is an essential piece of kit that measures blood glucose levels so that we can learn which foods we can eat and those we would be better to avoid.

Do you have your husband's result of HbA1c to hand?

Lowering the amount of carbohydrate in his diet will be key to managing this condition.

Have a wander around the forum and ask as many questions as you like.

Edit to ask.
Has your hubby been prescribed medications for Diabetes? This information means we will be better able to offer appropriate advice.

 

[Chook]

Welcome to the forum Diane x

Don't panic you will find lots of lovely people here to help you and your husband learn to cope with this. I'm just tagging @daisy1 for her very comprehensive welcome message.

There are people who, with some diet adjustments, have lived for many years with Type 2.

About depression, it can be brought on by uncontrolled raised blood glucose so he might find it fades away once he gets his blood glucose under control.

Have a wander round the forum and also have a look at the Diet Doctor website - then ask questions. We are here to help and support you.

 

[Rachox]

Hi Dianecz and welcome to the forum. You have arrived at a good place for advice and support.
Can I first commend you for supporting your husband and wanting to help him. The Diet Dr site that @Chook mentions is a good place to start learning about low carb eating, here’s a link:

https://www.dietdoctor.com/low-carb

Testing before and after eating is the best way to see what food your husband can tolerate so here’s some info on meters, and to be clear I have no commercial connections with any of the companies mentioned. For a meter with cheap strips go for the Tee2 + found here:

http://spirit-healthcare.co.uk/product/tee2-plus-blood-glucose-meter/ with the strips found here:

http://spirit-healthcare.co.uk/product/tee2-testing-strips/


With more expensive strips is the Caresens Dual which I currently use, this one has the advantage of glucose and ketone testing in one machine, it’s to be found here:

http://spirit-healthcare.co.uk/product/caresens-dual-blood-glucose-and-ketone-meter/

With the strips here:

http://spirit-healthcare.co.uk/product/caresens-pro-blood-glucose-test-strips/


And to be totally transparent I used to use the SD Code Free which has the cheapest strips available. However I found itto be becoming less and less reliable. Here it is for anyone wanting to give it a go:

http://homehealth-uk.com/product-category/blood-glucose/blood-glucose-monitor/

and here for the extra strips

http://homehealth-uk.com/all-products/sd-codefree-test-strips-to-be-used-only-with-the-sd-monitor/

There are discount codes if you buy in bulk.

5 packs 264086

10 packs 975833


Don’t forget to check the box that you have diabetes so you can buy VAT free. (for all meters and strips)

 

[Cocosilk]

Hi, I am so incredibly frightened, my husband was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. I am 60, he is 70, we have been together 22 years and got married 2 months ago. I don't know what to do to help him, everything I read on what to eat and what not to eat and all the information is conflicting. I have mental health issues and my darling Colin suffers from depression. What can I do, I love this man with all my heart, and I will protect him ferociously. Is there a definitive list on how to manage this. I don't care what happens to me in this world, but not Colin, I need to protect him, he is such a good man, please help or reassure me that this can be managed, I will go to the ends of the earth from him. Thank you in anticipation,
Diane x

I think the dietary advice for diabetics in the UK might be ahead of what it is in Australia (where I am) but this program might be helpful to you all the same as they are questioning the current guidelines here now too and starting to offer new advice: https://www.abc.net.au/catalyst/lowcarb/

 

[jjraak]

Hi, I am so incredibly frightened, my husband was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes.
I am 60, he is 70, we have been together 22 years and got married 2 months ago.

I don't know what to do to help him, everything I read on what to eat and what not to eat and all the information is conflicting.

I have mental health issues and my darling Colin suffers from depression.

What can I do,

I love this man with all my heart, and I will protect him ferociously.

Is there a definitive list on how to manage this.

I don't care what happens to me in this world, but not Colin, I need to protect him,
he is such a good man,

please help or reassure me that this can be managed,
I will go to the ends of the earth from him.
Thank you in anticipation,
Diane x

Now THAT'S the kind of partner many would die for @Dianecz

( and i'm sure your husband feels the very same about you....)

so relax for a minute..and just breathe slowly.

no ones going anywhere.

Btw, Congratulations on the wedding, and the enduring love affair.
( we are in the same boat, and have lasted WAY longer then any of our friends relationships.)

Now back to helping your man.

Many will post excellent help and assistance, because we have all been where you are now, just after we got diagnosed.

( i know i was....and i sure ain't dead yet.. )

but for simpleness..your beloved is allergic to sugars.
which if you don't know, we also get sugar/glucose from the carbs we eat when they get broken down inside us, once eaten.

so essentially we are allergic to carbohydrates.

and if your allergic to something .what do ya do..?

exactly... avoid or cut down.

but until we get a bit more idea of what the HBA1C score was ( the official test to say yep, you got diabetes )
and what medication/s he's on.

we are a little in the dark.

But cutting back on some of the higher carbs might be a good idea.
so although sugars is off the table, some sweet foods are too.
as well as some of the every day foods i used to eat lots of, also..

for me that was potatoes, rice and pasta.
to begin with.

(if it helps with shopping i don't bother with calories..i simply look at the Carb content on packets and tins
under 5gm per 100, it goes in the basket..5-10 i um and ahh, then decide IF its worthy ..and over 10gms
it goes right back on the shelf sharpish.)

i then fine tuned it with a better selection of vegetables and snacks befitting a type 2 diabetic.

and my HBA1c numbers at diagnosis, came DOWN from 57 oct 2018..
( Reasonably high, but others have started out much higher.)
to 42 in january 2019..and trust me i didn't starve or miss out on too much.

as an aside, the diabetes has struck us..(your husband and i ) at a late stage in out lives after taking many years to grow and become an issue.

i personally feel that the way of eating ..Low Carb/High (better) fats.is giving me protection from the potential damages and complications T2D (type 2 diabetes) can cause.

Sufficient enough that while i truly believe it HAS and is still putting my diabetes into remission.

.... if it isn't reversing or 'curing' my diabetes, ..it will have pushed back the diabetes for several years, perhaps even a decade or two.
so i fell it's more likely i'll be hit by a bus then anything diabetes can throw at me.

But it did take some learning from the good people on here, and taking a little time to practice what was spoken of
AND find the foods that DID agree with me better, and DIDN'T spike my allergies.

so it's a bit like school...
lots of homework, plenty of practice PLUS you/he gets to try out some new exciting recipes,
which will all go a long way to helping you and your husband make better food choices going forward.

Good bless you both,
and best of luck on your Journey.

Long may it last.

 

[poemagraphic]

Welcome Diane
Happy Easter.

You are both in the best place here to learn what you both need to understand.

I have only been here for 3 weeks tomorrrow. Several of the members here have been here for years and talk from experience.
I can say that in such a short time I have been both welcomed and reassured. The information here is first class I fully agree with all the posters above.

Take things one day at a time, keep coming back, keep reading, watching the videos on YouTube that will give you both plenty to think about. What to eat... what not to eat. staying calm and relaxed (A vital part of keeping abreast of things mentally and emotionally )
I recommend meditation, it is really 'just' sitting quite and watching/counting your breath breathing slowly in and count in your mind to 4 hold for a couple of seconds and then breath out for 4 and then just do it again for a little while.

Sit together and relax in silence for a little bit before going to sleep it helps you both to have a deeper peaceful sleep.

Po

Remember if you want to eat an elephant, take it one bite at a time.
errr. don't really eat any elephants though.

.

 

[Dianecz]

Now THAT'S the kind of partner many would die for @Dianecz

( and i'm sure your husband feels the very same about you....)

so relax for a minute..and just breathe slowly.

no ones going to anywhere.

Btw, Congratulations on the wedding, and the enduring love affair.
( we are in the same boat, and have lasted WAY longer then any of our friends relationships.)

Now back to helping your man.

Many will post excellent help and assistance, because we have all been where you are now, just after we got diagnosed.

( i know i was....and i sure ain't dead yet.. )

but for simpleness..your beloved is allergic to sugars.
which if you don't know, we also get sugar/glucose from the carbs we eat when they get broken down inside us, once eaten.

so essentially we are allergic to carbohydrates.

and if your allergic to something .what do ya do..?

exactly... avoid or cut down.

but until we get a bit more idea of what the HBA1C score was ( the official test to say yep, you got diabetes )
and what medication/s he's on.

we are a little in the dark.

But cutting back on some of the higher carbs might be a good idea.
so although sugars is off the table, some sweet foods are too.
as well as some of the every day foods i used to eat lots of, also..

for me that was potatoes, rice and pasta.
to begin with.

(if it helps with shopping i don't bother with calories..i simply look at the Carb content on packets and tins
under 5gm per 100, it goes in the basket..5-10 i um and ahh, then decide IF its worthy ..and over 10gms
it goes right back on the shelf sharpish.)

i then fine tuned it with a better selection of vegetables and snacks befitting a type 2 diabetic.

and my HBA1c numbers at diagnosis, came DOWN from 57 oct 2018..
( Reasonably high, but others have started out much higher.)
to 42 in january 2019..and trust me i didn't starve or miss out on too much.

as an aside, the diabetes has struck us..(your husband and i ) at a late stage in out lives after taking many years to grow and become an issue.

i personally feel that the way of eating ..Low Carb/High (better) fats.is giving me protection from the potential damages and complications T2D (type 2 diabetes) can cause.

Sufficient enough that while i truly believe it HAS and is still putting my diabetes into remission.

.... if it isn't reversing or 'curing' my diabetes, ..it will have pushed back the diabetes for several years, perhaps even a decade or two.
so i fell it's more likely i'll be hit by a bus then anything diabetes can throw at me.

But it did take some learning from the good people on here, and taking a little time to practice what was spoken of
AND find the foods that DID agree with me better, and DIDN'T spike my allergies.

so it's a bit like school...
lots of homework, plenty of practice PLUS you/he gets to try out some new exciting recipes,
which will all go a long way to helping you and your husband make better food choices going forward.

Good bless you both,
and best of luck on your Journey.

Long may it last.

Thanks so much for your reply,I think I love you already! His reading was 54, we have been tweaking our diet all week, I am doing it with him, I have bought books, am in the middle of doing a zillion spread sheets, he is outside playing with his Bonsai at the moment, happy as a sand boy, once again, thank you so much, you have made me feel better already.
Many Thanks, Diane

 

[enb54]

Hello Diane...
As others mention in this forum, do get yourselves a blood glucose monitor and test/record before and after eating/drinking anything. Doing this will ensure that you know what foods cause blood sugars to rise uncomfortably. Also, there is a lot of helpful information and support in this forum...

 

[jjraak]

Thanks so much for your reply,I think I love you already! His reading was 54, we have been tweaking our diet all week, I am doing it with him, I have bought books, am in the middle of doing a zillion spread sheets, he is outside playing with his Bonsai at the moment, happy as a sand boy, once again, thank you so much, you have made me feel better already.
Many Thanks, Diane

My pleasure @Dianecz
and the great thing about this forum, is it will be for so many others on here giving advice., as well

we all benefited at first arrival, So it's always nice to give something back.

Your time will come to 'repay' the debt forward to someone just like yourself,
and offer the reassurance and help to calm down those (like me n you) a little concerned and worried.

hope you get the pleasure of enjoying the Bonsai, once pruning is done.

 

[Scott-C]

Hi, @Dianecz , a big worry is always about complications, and there are endless studies about how T1 and T2 raises the risks of all sort of things.

But it's important to keep complications in perspective. I'm in Scotland, and an annual survey is published, showing not risks but actual numbers. I expect England does the same.

In the executive summary pic below, you'll see that the numbers of T2s recorded as having end stage kidney failure or major lower limb amputation are a mere 0.6%.

Other pages show around 1 to 2% having foot ulcers, and a mere 11 people recorded as being blind caused by diabetes.

It's obviously no consolation for those patients, but those are all very small numbers.

I suspect many of those will be older school, when there was less understanding of how important it was to keep blood glucose in normal range.

There's a surprising number of both T1s and T2s who just aren't that fussed if their levels are in the high teens or 20s, and they are the most likely candidates for complications.

While there can be absolutely no guarantees against complications, all the evidence shows that provided a decent effort is made to keep levels in check, the chances of developing complications is massively reduced, and the numbers actually experiencing them are reassuringly small.

The numbers are on Colin's side here provided he takes steps to keep bg in range.

Good luck!

 

[jjraak]

Hi, @Dianecz , a big worry is always about complications, and there are endless studies about how T1 and T2 raises the risks of all sort of things.

But it's important to keep complications in perspective. I'm in Scotland, and an annual survey is published, showing not risks but actual numbers. I expect England does the same.

In the executive summary pic below, you'll see that the numbers of T2s recorded as having end stage kidney failure or major lower limb amputation are a mere 0.6%.

Other pages show around 1 to 2% having foot ulcers, and a mere 11 people recorded as being blind caused by diabetes.

It's obviously no consolation for those patients, but those are all very small numbers.

I suspect many of those will be older school, when there was less understanding of how important it was to keep blood glucose in normal range.

There's a surprising number of both T1s and T2s who just aren't that fussed if their levels are in the high teens or 20s, and they are the most likely candidates for complications.

While there can be absolutely no guarantees against complications, all the evidence shows that provided a decent effort is made to keep levels in check, the chances of developing complications is massively reduced, and the numbers actually experiencing them are reassuringly small.

The numbers are on Colin's side here provided he takes steps to keep bg in range.

Good luck!

View attachment 32461

interesting post..cheers.

worrying how the T1..increase is near 20%
yet the T2D was close to 60% over the same period

and 5.5% of scotland diagnosed as diabetic back in 2017
if i read that right.

 

[Scott-C]

interesting post..cheers.

worrying how the T1..increase is near 20%
yet the T2D was close to 60% over the same period

and 5.5% of scotland diagnosed as diabetic back in 2017
if i read that right.

It would seem so. The survey is here for those interested in number-crunching:

http://www.diabetesinscotland.org.uk/publications.aspx

I was surprised when I learned how prevalent diabetes is in Finland. 10% of the population and the highest incidence of T1. Who'd have thunk it for a country which traditionally seems to be so close to nature? I blame inhaling fumes from pine trees...

 

[Resurgam]

I do feel that there are GP surgeries around the country which seem designed just to cause anxiety distress and further ill health.
All you needed to be told is that simple type two diabetes is a reaction to eating too many carbs when your body can't cope with them.
Lots of people are in the same state.
Many people drop sugar and starch from their diet and replace the foods containing them with low carb, often seeking out foods under 10 percent carbs, but they also eat more fat - having chicken thighs rather than breast fillets, so they use the fat as fuel - the process for doing that is not affected by diabetes.
After a few months may find that they are slimmer, more energetic and healthier than for some time, and they would not go back to eating breakfast cereals and other stodge for a pension.
It can take a bit of time, luck and determination, but many have done it.
If it doesn't work as well as it might then other things can be added, tablets, injections, but that is for the future, and might never be needed.

 

[Traceymac23]

Thanks so much for your reply,I think I love you already! His reading was 54, we have been tweaking our diet all week, I am doing it with him, I have bought books, am in the middle of doing a zillion spread sheets, he is outside playing with his Bonsai at the moment, happy as a sand boy, once again, thank you so much, you have made me feel better already.
Many Thanks, Diane

That's a fantastic start.......and I reckon the odd cuddle can only help.......in fact I prescribe one right now LOL (although to be fair it sounds as though neither of you miss out where cuddles are concerned).

Gardening is fantastic exercise for.....how shall I say......mature folk so keep him fiddling with that bonsai.

Keep smiling,learning and loving TOGETHER and you'll both be just peachy

 

[bulkbiker]

Hi, I am so incredibly frightened, my husband was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. I am 60, he is 70, we have been together 22 years and got married 2 months ago. I don't know what to do to help him, everything I read on what to eat and what not to eat and all the information is conflicting. I have mental health issues and my darling Colin suffers from depression. What can I do, I love this man with all my heart, and I will protect him ferociously. Is there a definitive list on how to manage this. I don't care what happens to me in this world, but not Colin, I need to protect him, he is such a good man, please help or reassure me that this can be managed, I will go to the ends of the earth from him. Thank you in anticipation,
Diane x

Please don't be frightened.. a whole load of us are now so much more healthy that we are quite grateful for being diagnosed.. In the early days you may find that hard to believe but trust me it can happen.

 

[JAT1]

I agree with the others, don't be afraid. This is a health situation that you can do something about unlike so many others. Lower your carbs, keep the blood sugar in range and the chances of suffering complications are the same as those for non-diabetics.

 

[daisy1]

@Dianecz
Hello and welcome to the Forum Here is the Basic Information we give to new members and I hope you will find it both interesting and helpful.


BASIC INFORMATION FOR NEW MEMBERS

Diabetes is the general term to describe people who have blood that is sweeter than normal. A number of different types of diabetes exist.

A diagnosis of diabetes tends to be a big shock for most of us. It’s far from the end of the world though and on this forum you'll find well over 300,000 people who are demonstrating this.

On the forum we have found that with the number of new people being diagnosed with diabetes each day, sometimes the NHS is not being able to give all the advice it would perhaps like to deliver - particularly with regards to people with type 2 diabetes.

The role of carbohydrate

Carbohydrates are a factor in diabetes because they ultimately break down into sugar (glucose) within our blood. We then need enough insulin to either convert the blood sugar into energy for our body, or to store the blood sugar as body fat.

If the amount of carbohydrate we take in is more than our body’s own (or injected) insulin can cope with, then our blood sugar will rise.

The bad news

Research indicates that raised blood sugar levels over a period of years can lead to organ damage, commonly referred to as diabetic complications.

The good news

People on the forum here have shown that there is plenty of opportunity to keep blood sugar levels from going too high. It’s a daily task but it’s within our reach and it’s well worth the effort.

Controlling your carbs

The info below is primarily aimed at people with type 2 diabetes, however, it may also be of benefit for other types of diabetes as well.

There are two approaches to controlling your carbs:

• Reduce your carbohydrate intake
• Choose ‘better’ carbohydrates

Reduce your carbohydrates

A large number of people on this forum have chosen to reduce the amount of carbohydrates they eat as they have found this to be an effective way of improving (lowering) their blood sugar levels.

The carbohydrates which tend to have the most pronounced effect on blood sugar levels tend to be starchy carbohydrates such as rice, pasta, bread, potatoes and similar root vegetables, flour based products (pastry, cakes, biscuits, battered food etc) and certain fruits.

Choosing better carbohydrates

The low glycaemic index diet is often favoured by healthcare professionals but some people with diabetes find that low GI does not help their blood sugar enough and may wish to cut out these foods altogether.

Read more on carbohydrates and diabetes.

Over 145,000 people have taken part in the Low Carb Program - a 10 week structured education course that is helping people lose weight and reduce medication dependency by explaining the science behind carbs, insulin and GI.

Eating what works for you

Different people respond differently to different types of food. What works for one person may not work so well for another. The best way to see which foods are working for you is to test your blood sugar with a glucose meter.

To be able to see what effect a particular type of food or meal has on your blood sugar is to do a test before the meal and then test after the meal. A test 2 hours after the meal gives a good idea of how your body has reacted to the meal.

The blood sugar ranges recommended by NICE are as follows:

Blood glucose ranges for type 2 diabetes

• Before meals: 4 to 7 mmol/l
• 2 hours after meals: under 8.5 mmol/l

Blood glucose ranges for type 1 diabetes (adults)

• Before meals: 4 to 7 mmol/l
• 2 hours after meals: under 9 mmol/l

Blood glucose ranges for type 1 diabetes (children)

• Before meals: 4 to 8 mmol/l
• 2 hours after meals: under 10 mmol/l

However, those that are able to, may wish to keep blood sugar levels below the NICE after meal targets.

Access to blood glucose test strips

The NICE guidelines suggest that people newly diagnosed with type 2 diabetes should be offered:

• structured education to every person and/or their carer at and around the time of diagnosis, with annual reinforcement and review
• self-monitoring of plasma glucose to a person newly diagnosed with type 2 diabetes only as an integral part of his or her self-management education

Therefore both structured education and self-monitoring of blood glucose should be offered to people with type 2 diabetes. Read more on getting access to blood glucose testing supplies.

You may also be interested to read questions to ask at a diabetic clinic.

Note: This post has been edited from Sue/Ken's post to include up to date information.

 

[1spuds]

Cut out the white rice,potatoes,pasta and breads.No added sugar and you will be well on the way to dealing with this.Hi fat,low carb is what works for a LOT of people here.Fats arent the enemy,now they are your friend.Carbs are the enemy.Read food labels,learn what is low carb and especially avoid those in pre packaged foods as a lot are full of sugars and carbs.most are in my experience.Take those out of the diet.

Soon you will be testing before you try something,and 2 hours later.You will quickly see what he can and cannot eat.We are all different,so eat what your meter says you can tolerate.Very simple really. Many of us record every meal and every test so its easy to see whats working.

You CAN do this,its not nearly as scary as it seems once over the shock.And dont be shy,any questions you have will be answered by real people who know what does and doesnt work.By actual experience.

Take a gander at this thread.Shows real people,what they eat,and what their numbers are.Gives great,fantastic meal ideas.
https://www.diabetes.co.uk/forum/th...orning-and-what-did-you-eat-yesterday.117017/