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New diabetic nurse appointment this Tuesday

lucylocket61

lucylocket61

Expert
Messages
6,394
Location
Wrexham
Type of diabetes
Type 2
Treatment type
Diet only
  1. Can I have some vibes for Tuesday please? I am meeting my new Diabetic Nurse for my results and annual review. My experience so far has not been good, with fat shaming, heavily implied that i must be lying about how much I eat, despite my results, disbelief of my inability to lose weight, ignoring the letter from my liver specialist, disbelief that I have been diet controlled (successfully) for 10 years now, pressure to take meds etc etc etc and that was just the pre-appointment checks and blood taking. Please vibe that I keep my nerve, keep my cool, dont lose my temper, dont cry etc. I have no other nurse to see, this is a small surgery in a village. Changing GP's is not an option. Practice manager is her SIL and they are all related in the surgery team. I know I can make them make me have a GP appointment (my GP is nice) but its the effort, and the nerves, and the toll on me later..........sorry
 
Totally understand what you are going through. Been there too. I'll be thinking of you and pray that the new DN really listens and understands and believes you.
 
Good luck for Tuesday and a virtual hug as well.

I have had similar experiences- they always believe my super skinny husband but assume I am lying about how much I eat. If there was an olympic event for calorie counting I think I could represent Australia- maybe you would be competing against me :)

Let us know how it goes!
 
lucylocket61 said:
  1. Can I have some vibes for Tuesday please? I am meeting my new Diabetic Nurse for my results and annual review. My experience so far has not been good, with fat shaming, heavily implied that i must be lying about how much I eat, despite my results, disbelief of my inability to lose weight, ignoring the letter from my liver specialist, disbelief that I have been diet controlled (successfully) for 10 years now, pressure to take meds etc etc etc and that was just the pre-appointment checks and blood taking. Please vibe that I keep my nerve, keep my cool, dont lose my temper, dont cry etc. I have no other nurse to see, this is a small surgery in a village. Changing GP's is not an option. Practice manager is her SIL and they are all related in the surgery team. I know I can make them make me have a GP appointment (my GP is nice) but its the effort, and the nerves, and the toll on me later..........sorry
Click to expand...
Hi Lucylocket

just remember the brilliant blood test results listed at the bottom of your post. Ignore any rudeness and just get the answers you want. Hope it goes better than expected.
 
Stealing a phrase from our indigenous people here in Australia: Always was, always will be telling the truth, tell them

Stick to your guns and don't let them get to you, just smile at them all the time.

A bucket full of hugs coming your way.
 
lucylocket61 said:
I am meeting my new Diabetic Nurse for my results and annual review.
Click to expand...

Well let's hope she is more educated than her SIL and has some knowledge about low carbing. My DNs in New Zealand are all on board (and NZ is normally 20 years behind the UK on most medical stuff) so am channelling some of her enthusiasm in the direction of your DN.

Fat shaming .... yuk. They should be T2 remission/control by diet acclaiming.

Good luck, as the others have said, lots of virtual hugs.
 
Maybe she will be more clued up, empathetic and just nice… fingers crossed for that!

If not, well - what do you actually want or need from her? All I want from mine is an annual referral for a diabetic eye check. Of course if she wants to say I’ve done well, that’s nice, but I don’t need her to validate my results. If she turns out to be a stinker, just don’t enter into discussion - in and out quicksticks and get on with your day. Do not attach any import to the unsolicited opinions of idiotic people you have no respect for. You know more about the treatment of diabetes than she does, for sure.
 
WOT @TeddyTottie said.

10 years..... OUTSTANDING results.

You don't need their advice, you already got this

Nod & smile as you bat away their negatively.

Best wishes for s friendly chat, some decent advice & maybe a pat on the back.
 
@lucylocket61 You have my best wishes, and fingers crossed for a more understanding nurse this time.

It's my experience and belief that generally anybody who tries to put you down, shame you, imply that you're lying, etc, is someone who is insecure and probably ignorant, incompetent. and/or jealous, so their opinions and comments are not really worth bothering about - easier said than done I know.

(I know a bit about how you must be feeling: I've recently had an problem over my existing management of a non-diabetic issue with a new nurse who was determined to get her way, She sent me to a specialist who agreed with what I was already doing, and told me that if nursey tries to tell me different again, she'll have words with them. :D)
 
Sending you the vibes you want for calm, but actually if they did that to me I’d very very politely lose my temper right back at their ignorance and rudeness with some well place facts as well as recommend the Dr Unwin CPD training to help bring her up to date. I hate it when medical staff push us around or are rude.
 
@lucylocket61 - your frustration is screaming out loud and clear from the page here, and I so feel for you.

The harsh reality is you likely know more about T2 than your nurse, and likely even your GP, but that doesn't deflect from the harsh reality that they are your gateway to care. That gateway can be care from them, or from an elevated source.

Whilst sometimes changing GP seems like an attractive option, we all know deep down the grass is not always greener. At the moment there is a lot on our village Facebook pages, voicing frustration at both the village surgery and others in the adjacent town. Sound like everywhere has issues. Personally, I'd not want to be gambling on a better deal elsewhere. It strikes you could end up in another tricky situation, but several weeks down the line - even if it was an option to you.

As for your appointment? You know my usual mantra: Make a list of the things YOU want to discuss. It's your appointment. Not theirs. Write down each point you want to be covered. For me, I would also want to know what I wanted from the HCPs. I'd want to understand my own desired outcome, after all, that's likely what you will judge the appointment on. Did they come up to scratch, fail or surpass your expectations? That's where you will be on Tuesday night.

If during the appointment you get emotional? So what? Those would not be tears of weakness or because you are feeble. They would be tears of pure frustration. You have fought for a long time it seems.

If you are too frustrated or emotional to go through your list, then give it to her, and ask her to go through it.

Bottom line is, if you end up being prescribed some meds to help you through these difficult times, then maybe that's just fine. Meds aren't necessarily forever, and certainly aren't a sign of failure. They're a sign that things have change for you for now. In time they may settle, but if not it's more important you are supported in better health than you are counting the meds you take.

Lucy, I'm sure you know you have lots of people here who have your back. We'll be rooting for you.

Do whatever you have to to get through the appointment. The only thing I'll say is don't hit her. That tends not to end well.

Go for it Lucy. My fingers will be well crossed for you tomorrow.
 
Aw @lucylocket61, I was sending out positive vibes to some other Lucylocket in the profile list which I realised wasn't you so now I am sending it to you in waves. It is horrible when you have a Nurse like that, who sits there with a dubious look on her face. My own response would be the exact opposite of yours but we are all different and it's easy to get angry and then upset and then forget your thread, which doesn't help. I wonder if you could write down a paragraph or two about your regime and hand it to her saying 'I've done this because I get upset when I'm not believed' and maybe write down a few questions for her to answer instead of her asking YOU! xxx
 
Medications prescribed do not ned to be collected or taken. It is up to you to ultimately decide what you do with them. They cannot force you against your will.

Have you considered having an advocate with you? This is allowed in my area. A friend with you to watch your back. They would of course be party to your confidential info, so be aware of that.

As has been said already, the LCHF treatment plan provided by Dr Unwin is recognised formally by the NHS as applicable. The Low Carb course offered by this site is also recognised by NHS.

Good luck for tomorrow. Hope it goes well.
 
@lucylocket61 You've got lots of vibes now, so I'm sending you something different.
It's an invisible Teflon coated cloak.
You put it on and all slings and barbs sent towards you just slide right off without making any effect at all.
It's an amazing cloak in that it makes the wearer stand an inch or 2 taller and sit straighter so most people won't even think of messing with the wearer.
Best of all it is invisible to no one knows you are wearing it

I was given it in another forum on the understanding it would be passed on in time, and I pass it to you in the same understanding. Wear it as often as needed, then when you don't need it any more, pass it along, please.
 
A big welsh hug is being delivered by some fluffy sheep :) You do a excellent job of getting your point across on posts on the forum so try and do the same at the meeting :happy:
 
I'm with Oldvatr on this one. Take along a friend who can ride shotgun and intervene if necessary. Just knowing that you have someone in your corner can make all the difference to how you feel and can also make a DN modify their behaviour. Warn the surgery in advance that you are bringing a friend and be prepared to insist that your friend stays with you. Brief your friend in advance as to what outcomes you expect and try to get in first!
I have been both the friend and the befriended with good effect. All the best for tomorrow - it is your appointment and it is about you and what you want.
 
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